Yuri on ice: Dealing with you

What happens when Sassy Madeleine meets Salty Yuri and both are coached by Viktor Nikiforov? What happens when he persuades them to try pair skating? How does Yuuri feel about all of this? And where the hell does that heard of cows fit in?

Warnings:

Possible language
Possible trigger
Possible abuse
Still figuring this out as I go