Roasts and Comebacks - greyyysweaterr - Wattpad

Story cover for Roasts and Comebacks by greyyysweaterr

Roasts and Comebacks

Reads 69,848
Votes 2,611
Parts 153
Time 12m

Reads 69,848
Votes 2,611
Parts 153
Time 12m

comebacks funny hilarious humor idek lmafo lmao lol lolidk roast

It's very cut and dry 

Roasts
And
Comebacks

Also lol this book let my inner bad bitch shine through 

Share with your friends, familys, and pets if your that bored.

I also dare all of you reading this to try out some of the roasts and comebacks in this book.

Comment on the one you used and tell me what happened. Or you could just private DM me :)


Also this book uses some "adult" language.

|#208 in Humor 8/25/17|
|#179 in Humor 8/26/16|All Rights Reserved

comebacks funny hilarious humor idek lmafo lmao lol lolidk roast

Table of contents

153 parts

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mememe › bbno$ [2] by color_mebadd

[PART 2] SEQUELLLS- which aren't really as good as the original one. [If you haven't read the first book go do that !] started: 4-27-19 Finished: t-b-d **DISCLAIMER** This book involves cussing and inappropriate jokes. Read at you're own risk.

For the curvy|BWWM by Black_baddie

"Why do you love me? I'm fat" I said as I looked down at my feet. "Princess there's a difference between fat and thick" he said as he grabbed a hand full of my ass. --------------------- Diamond Ryder is a 17 year old curvy girl. Her past is so messed up that she doesn't consider herself beautiful. She can't even look in the mirror anymore. She has no friends at school and her bestfriend is her mom. Sam Greene is the school's bad boy. Girls chase after him but, he doesn't really pay attention to them. Diamond ran into Sam's life, literally. When they come across each other what will happen? Will Diamond let her guard down and love again? ------------------ ⚠️Under major editing⚠️ ------ Jay112098 "I really enjoy your story for the curvy, it's a nice escape from reality. I live in a small racist town where I get bullied and when I read your book it gives me a peace of mind that not all white people are racist" Tayjay207 "My favorite book" Amii_xo13 "I love this book" XWeirdSnackx "Its like my life depends on it" Zoeneluise "Its weird because I can relate to this" MochaBousso "I just LOVE THIS STORY❤ definitely going to my reading list" Kuwonubeans "I love this booookkk❤" Karentina23 "Gosh I love this book❤" User75473053 "I'm in love with this book❤❤❤"

Cliché, Touché and Douche by FadedSmoke

{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.

Revenge Of The Fat Wallflower|✓ by Nikithasuz123

(Editing) His eyes widen and his lips part in pain as he stares wordlessly at me and then at the large blotch that forms around his chest . He clutches it as he coughs in pain. I didn't get to push him into a sewer, but this feels so much better. I sardonically chuckle to myself before leaning in to whisper into his ear. "Gotcha." - - - I was a nobody . A big fat wallflower that was always in the background. The only mistake I made was confessing to the school's prince. That day I was completely and utterly humiliated. It's been two years and now I'm back. Back for some sweet revenge. #Winner of the Pre-Watty awards for best laugh worthy book. *Filled with humor and jokes that can't stop you from chuckling ;) # 1 ranking in Stop bullying (10/5/18) #11 In Humor (1/6/18) ©Nikithasuz123 Cover credits to unreadymage. Amazing cover XD

Feel The Angst by virginsacrifice

(Highest ranking #2 in marysue) [previously titled "marysue roasts"] *warning* If you are a sensitive little child don't read this book, you'll probably end up crying... AND READ MY DISCLAIMER FIRST!! Basically, you can send me whatever you want and I'll do a rating/rant/give my opinion on it:)) but don't worry you still can send me ocs to rate Examples of things you can send: Ratings: ocs, book, au etc... Rant:anything cringe worthy Opinion: anything really(fandoms,idk food???)

Runaway (slight BDSM) by NikkiBug16

"I don't know who you think you are disrespecting me like that but you're going to regret it," he growls. "Oh, kinky," I purr, causing him to roll his eyes and let out a disappointed sigh. "Put her in the trunk," he says and makes his way to the passenger seat. "Woah at least take me to dinner first." I could've imagined it but I think I heard the bodyguard chuckle before he slammed the top of the trunk, leaving me in total darkness. (Can read the book on its own but there will be characters from the previous book mentioned) ---- *BDSM *Warning of emotional and physical abuse *Warning of sexual content *If any of this is triggering for you, I suggest you read another book Highest ranking #1 in disobedience #1 in funny moments #1 in sassy #1 in poor

Devil Or Angel? by paperandpen444

"You bitch! Look what you fucking did!" "I did?" I ask. "You were the fuck the blew the red light!" "I didn't blow any fucking lights, bitch whore! You destroyed my fucking Jeep!" "No I didn't! You got a tiny fucking dent and a goddamn scratch? I can't even drive my fucking car!" "So? It's a piece of shit anyways and you shouldn't have blown the fucking light!" "I didn't fucking blow the light, asshole! You did!" "I did not!" he shouts, getting right in my face. "How old are you anyways? Three?" "No! You're acting like a fucking two year old! Just own up to your goddamn mistake!" "I didn't make a mistake, you cunt! You did!" "Fuck you, dick! I didn't do anything!" "How fucking old are you?" he hisses, his lips inches from mine. "I'll be fucking twenty one tomorrow, fucker, how about you, huh? How old are you? Thirty? Forty?" "Twenty fucking two." he hisses. "Now pay up!" he puts his hand out. <><> Alyssa is your regular girl with perfect looks. Luke is your hot bad boy asshole. When you push the two together, two things can happen. One, they can click, or two, they can crash. And it won't be hard to wonder if he's a Devil or an Angel.

"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] by lazyazz_bijj

Hello! This is my first book so there will probably be some Errors but i'll try my best to fix it. Also English is not my native language so pardon my bad grammar😅😅😅 . Anyway here are some keywords: (Y/N) = Your Name (L/N) = Last Name (H/C) = Hair Colour (H/L) = Hair Length (F/C) = Favourite Colour (S/F/C) = Second Favourite Colour (F/F) = Favorite Food (F/D) = Favourite Drink (F/S) =Favourite Sweet (B/N) = Brother's Name (M/N) = Mother's Name (F/N) = Father's Name __________________________________________________________________________________ You're on college btw and (Y/N) is female. here's a peek at my book. _________________________________________It was a sunday morning and you were making lunch for you and you're roommates. Suddenly you got a call from the headmaster saying that you and your roommates would be having a new roommate and that they would be arriving after lunch. ~Time Skip~ You were playing video games on the couch when you heard a knock on the door. You were confused on why there were knocking on the door because it was Sunday and most of the students were out doing god knows what. Then you suddenly remembered that the headmaster told you that you were having a new roommate today. You opened the door and you see a cute half human half demon boy. "Oh! You must be our new roommate. Nice to meet you, My name's (Y/N) (L/N)." You introduced yourself. "Sup cutie. The names Selever nice to meet you." ............... That's all folks! If you want more of this story, I suggest you read this book. Edit: Just a fair warning. Some chapters may have been jumbled Because of an error so please check the chapters before you read them please.

Keeping Up With Trouble by Lucky_virgo

Who knew you could get into an amusing conversation with a guy you just met at a coffee shop? Not Heather. ~~ "Why do you keep on following me?" "Because." "Because what?" "Just because." "Stupid idiot" "Do you really wanna know why?" "Will I ask you if I don't wanna know why?" "Way to go with the attitude Amore" "Just answer the damn question estùpido" "Well, keeping up with trouble is fun don't you think?" . . . "What the heck are you talking about?" ~~ With secrets and a whole different level of danger facing them, Who knew that said guy is determined to develop a special hate and love relationship with trouble itself? Not Heather, that's for sure.

bad thoughts › bbno$ [1] by color_mebadd

[PART 1]this book was created to make you laugh and it has some dirty jokes in there.. I hope you enjoy!! <3 finished: 3-17-19 **DISCLAIMER** This book involves cussing and inappropriate behavior. Read at you're own risk.

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Slide 1 of 10

mememe › bbno$ [2] cover

For the curvy|BWWM cover

Cliché, Touché and Douche cover

Revenge Of The Fat Wallflower|✓ cover

Feel The Angst cover

Runaway (slight BDSM) cover

Devil Or Angel? cover

"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] cover

Keeping Up With Trouble cover

bad thoughts › bbno$ [1] cover

mememe › bbno$ [2]

[PART 2] SEQUELLLS- which aren't really as good as the original one. [If you haven't read the first book go do that !] started: 4-27-19 Finished: t-b-d DISCLAIMER This book involves cussing and inappropriate jokes. Read at you're own risk.