Roasts and Comebacks - greyyysweaterr - Wattpad

Story cover for Roasts and Comebacks by greyyysweaterr

Roasts and Comebacks

Reads 69,848
Votes 2,611
Parts 153
Time 12m

Reads 69,848
Votes 2,611
Parts 153
Time 12m

comebacks funny hilarious humor idek lmafo lmao lol lolidk roast

It's very cut and dry 

Roasts
And
Comebacks

Also lol this book let my inner bad bitch shine through 

Share with your friends, familys, and pets if your that bored.

I also dare all of you reading this to try out some of the roasts and comebacks in this book.

Comment on the one you used and tell me what happened. Or you could just private DM me :)


Also this book uses some "adult" language.

|#208 in Humor 8/25/17|
|#179 in Humor 8/26/16|All Rights Reserved

comebacks funny hilarious humor idek lmafo lmao lol lolidk roast

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153 parts

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Cliché, Touché and Douche by FadedSmoke

{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.

Jokes😁 (COMPLETE) by Joons_unshaken_hand

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Perfect Fate ✔ (Moved To Inkitt) by fanoshkaflippo

Wattpad Creator! Happy and proud. HIM: Staying the night? Not my thing. Hearts and flowers? Boring. Falling in love? Not anytime soon. Settling down? Off the table. Getting married? You're kidding me, right? That was me before the night we first met. Because, well, meeting a hot chick that made me hard just by looking at her was definitely not in my plans when I sneaked out of a woman's apartment after what was already a long night. Taking her home and getting her a chocolate cake, though, was kind of intentional. But falling for her? Boy, that was pretty much inevitable. HER: He came out of nowhere, literally. I was there, sitting on that bench, barefoot and crying and just getting my heart broken in peace and silence. Then he appeared, all mad and furious and sexy and tall and just drool-worthy! And just like that, despite my poor attempts of escaping him, he had me wrapped in his world. A crazy yet heart-fluttering world, that I have absolutely no intentions of leaving anytime soon. ------- Character development is a main theme in this book. It shows you how they both work on changing for the better, while trying to overcome the obstacles in their relationship and fight for each other till the end. ** Warning!! Some chapters contain sexual scenes, but there's always a warning at the head of the chapter. Do not read them if you're under 18.** * Also, please beware that this story contains a lot of swearing. Read at your own risk. * **I don't own any photos used in this book. All are found on the internet for public use.** Highest Rankings: Sexy - #1 Love - #1 General Fiction - #41 Romance - #46 ------ ** Copyright © 2014 by Fanoshka Flippo (Farah Fekry). All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of Fanoshka Flippo / Farah Fekry. **

Runaway (slight BDSM) by NikkiBug16

"I don't know who you think you are disrespecting me like that but you're going to regret it," he growls. "Oh, kinky," I purr, causing him to roll his eyes and let out a disappointed sigh. "Put her in the trunk," he says and makes his way to the passenger seat. "Woah at least take me to dinner first." I could've imagined it but I think I heard the bodyguard chuckle before he slammed the top of the trunk, leaving me in total darkness. (Can read the book on its own but there will be characters from the previous book mentioned) ---- *BDSM *Warning of emotional and physical abuse *Warning of sexual content *If any of this is triggering for you, I suggest you read another book Highest ranking #1 in disobedience #1 in funny moments #1 in sassy #1 in poor

For the curvy|BWWM by Black_baddie

"Why do you love me? I'm fat" I said as I looked down at my feet. "Princess there's a difference between fat and thick" he said as he grabbed a hand full of my ass. --------------------- Diamond Ryder is a 17 year old curvy girl. Her past is so messed up that she doesn't consider herself beautiful. She can't even look in the mirror anymore. She has no friends at school and her bestfriend is her mom. Sam Greene is the school's bad boy. Girls chase after him but, he doesn't really pay attention to them. Diamond ran into Sam's life, literally. When they come across each other what will happen? Will Diamond let her guard down and love again? ------------------ ⚠️Under major editing⚠️ ------ Jay112098 "I really enjoy your story for the curvy, it's a nice escape from reality. I live in a small racist town where I get bullied and when I read your book it gives me a peace of mind that not all white people are racist" Tayjay207 "My favorite book" Amii_xo13 "I love this book" XWeirdSnackx "Its like my life depends on it" Zoeneluise "Its weird because I can relate to this" MochaBousso "I just LOVE THIS STORY❤ definitely going to my reading list" Kuwonubeans "I love this booookkk❤" Karentina23 "Gosh I love this book❤" User75473053 "I'm in love with this book❤❤❤"

Keeping Up With Trouble by Lucky_virgo

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"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] by lazyazz_bijj

Hello! This is my first book so there will probably be some Errors but i'll try my best to fix it. Also English is not my native language so pardon my bad grammar😅😅😅 . Anyway here are some keywords: (Y/N) = Your Name (L/N) = Last Name (H/C) = Hair Colour (H/L) = Hair Length (F/C) = Favourite Colour (S/F/C) = Second Favourite Colour (F/F) = Favorite Food (F/D) = Favourite Drink (F/S) =Favourite Sweet (B/N) = Brother's Name (M/N) = Mother's Name (F/N) = Father's Name __________________________________________________________________________________ You're on college btw and (Y/N) is female. here's a peek at my book. _________________________________________It was a sunday morning and you were making lunch for you and you're roommates. Suddenly you got a call from the headmaster saying that you and your roommates would be having a new roommate and that they would be arriving after lunch. ~Time Skip~ You were playing video games on the couch when you heard a knock on the door. You were confused on why there were knocking on the door because it was Sunday and most of the students were out doing god knows what. Then you suddenly remembered that the headmaster told you that you were having a new roommate today. You opened the door and you see a cute half human half demon boy. "Oh! You must be our new roommate. Nice to meet you, My name's (Y/N) (L/N)." You introduced yourself. "Sup cutie. The names Selever nice to meet you." ............... That's all folks! If you want more of this story, I suggest you read this book. Edit: Just a fair warning. Some chapters may have been jumbled Because of an error so please check the chapters before you read them please.

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Feel The Angst by virginsacrifice

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Book 1✔️ Sugar Baby by LoveLiveLust

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Slide 1 of 10

Cliché, Touché and Douche cover

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Runaway (slight BDSM) cover

For the curvy|BWWM cover

Keeping Up With Trouble cover

"My Little Monster~"|| Selever X Reader [DISCONTINUED] cover

The Satan's Eve (Completed)✔ NOT EDITED cover

Feel The Angst cover

Book 1✔️ Sugar Baby cover

Cliché, Touché and Douche

{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.