Pickup Lines
- Reads 662
- Votes 36
- Parts 12
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Sun, Nov 19, 2017
The funniest pickup lines ever.
Totally worth reading.
I would give a better description of it but I believe in no spoilers so yeaahhh.
Dude you already know what it's about so why a blurb.
It's pickup lines.
Go read it please?
Pretty please?
Pretty please with a cherry on top?
All Rights Reserved
#8
sofunny
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𝐀𝐧 𝐮𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭. 𝐒𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 20-𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫-𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐞, 𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐬𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞. 𝐇𝐞'𝐬 𝐚 36-𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫-𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫, 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐝, 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜. 𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐬, 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐥𝐮𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐬. 𝐁𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭, 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤. 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐬?
Picture this: You enter the mall with your friends. As you're making your way to buy a strawberry smoothie, you notice something more delicious walking right towards you. As he comes closer, he gives you a heart stopping smirk then takes you by surprise. He pulls you into a headlock, jabs a gun in your temple, then runs away with you. As I uncover why this mysterious model kidnapped me, I find myself tackling, punching, hugging, and watching Disney movies with him. Call me reckless, but something about this troubled kidnapper is quite intriguing yet heartbreaking. Find out if I, Skylar Scrowbar, end up dead in a ditch somewhere, or end up helplessly falling in love with my sexy kidnapper.
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