Back To You {Louis Tomlinson}
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- Parts 6
My name is Louis Tomlinson.
My happiness and my confidence was my mom Johannah Deakin. She left me, i lost her and she will never come back. My life was paused, but Freddie Reign Tomilinson my son made me to replay the button of my life ,and i got back my lost happiness with Eleanor Calder my girlfriend. First love of my life, with her i spent four years of my life. They both filled my life and have their shades in my existence.
But i didn't know it was short lived, i didn't know that there is no happiness for me in my life, if i did know it already i would have held it longer because now i have nothing. Nothing!
I lost them, i couldn't save them, she got hurt because of me, Freddie was there because of me, it was my fault. I couldn't save them. It was just my fault.
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theaquapearl
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"Nothing makes you hurt like hurting who you love" Love shouldn't hurt, loving somebody with everything you have shouldn't make you feel like you're dying. Louis feels like he's drowning. He should have known where this was going from the start, he should have been prepared. Now he's waking up in an empty bed, some days he doesn't want to even wake up again. There's a hole in his heart; it's in the shape of Harry. Nothing he does can fill it. Drugs, alcohol, pouring out his heart into songs that Harry probably won't ever hear. When Louis is with him, he feels like he's in heaven. Being alone, that's what he feels he deserves, at least Harry can be happier without him. Maybe if they met at a different time, under different circumstances, he could have saved them. Louis had to do what was best for Harry, but it kills him a little everyday. Louis sees his smile everyday, but he knows it's no longer for him. Someone else makes Harry happier, but Louis wanted it to be him. They could have had forever. Louis would have given Harry everything. "Forget what I said, it's not what I meant" Harry had tried to say, but Louis knew that wasn't the truth. After everything they've been through, Louis still loves him.
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