Why Kacey Couldn't

The first time I was almost sure I'd imagined it as I walked down the cleaner parts of the asylum. "It can't be his scent...you're delusional...It's all just a part of your illness." I whispered, trying desperately to convince myself, but as I carried on quicker than before the scent stayed with me still. I ignored it to the best of my ability...but I knew... I remember him... though it has been quite a while.

Today as I trudged down that particular corridor it happened again... the beautifully toxic scent of sage twisted around me, grabbing my attention and threatening to overwhelm me with memories... However, this time I did not fight it... instead I let it consume me and intoxicate me, transporting my spirit back in time... back into his arms... back in that car again... recklessly riding... without a doubt... without a care in the world apart from one another... or so I thought.

Obviously I was wrong... Now I'm back... back in the real world full of ignorant fucked up kids and orderlies who pretend to care about us when they honestly couldn't care less. Back in the wretched hospital which seems more like a prison at times... back in this horridly dull routine that I know have the pleasure of calling my life. Sage is nowhere to be found... At least he evaded a ruthless arrest . . . but he also abandoned me... replaced me... forgot me... I shook my head, pushing all traces of him from my thoughts, and droning on... a shell of a woman as I usually am in this place. I cannot escape. I will not try.