Theory of Me - Procrastination Queen - Wattpad

Story cover for Theory of Me by Willow_Leif

Theory of Me

Reads 48
Votes 0
Parts 7
Time 13m

Reads 48
Votes 0
Parts 7
Time 13m

depression friendship journal lgbt library loss love nerd realization selfdiscovery selfharm teen

"There she is, Jezebel, directly across the street leaning on her sky blue cruiser and pointing her face towards the clouds. The rain is coming down hard now, but she doesn't move. Her eyes flutter open and she smiles at me. It isn't shy or awkward like it had been before; it is warm and comforting. My heart rate noticeably picks up speed. I shake my head, turn around, and make my way slowly to the running car, not daring to look back."
This is the journal of a depressed adolescent. In this specific journal they are trying to understand their feelings for the strange new girl in town. Keep in mind this is only one of the journals from only one perspective, so you may have unanswered questions about the story line and for most of this journal their identity is unknown to the reader. 
	When there is a date and the chapter is titled as a journal that means you are reading a journal entry. Outside of that you are still in the perspective of this journal keeper they just aren't writing in their journal at that point in the story.All Rights Reserved

depression friendship journal lgbt library loss love nerd realization selfdiscovery selfharm teen

Table of contents

7 parts

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{ #3 } Twisted Moon (MxM || 18+) by Snape75

Black Moon Series Book #3 Warning: #Mature #Gay #Triggering You shouldn't read this story before you have read at least I Would Give Him The Moon as you'll be missing part of the plot otherwise. My name is Camden and my friends categorize me as a sadist. A sadistic Dominant. I need to get this anger within out and I do so by inflicting mental and physical pain to my Submissives. And yet the moment I get the best kicks is through the aftercare I dispense. My soul is twisted. My past is twisted. * My name is Noah. I'm a homeless teenager who ran away from a homophobic family who never loved me because of what I supposedly did to my twin sister. I need pain to soothe my troubled mind. So I self-harm. My soul is twisted. My past is twisted. "A lifetime of consumption, They've all become the same, I punish them for pleasure, And pleasure some with pain. I punish you with pleasure, And pleasure you with pain" Thirty Seconds To Mars - End Of All Days "I wanna hide the truth I wanna shelter you But with the beast inside There's nowhere we can hide [...] When you feel my heat Look into my eyes It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide Don't get too close It's dark inside It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide" Imagine Dragons - Demons

The Death Of Me by HannahxGracex

A girl has her problems, no matter what happens. There will always be a biological problem with a girl, even if she denies the problem’s existence. She will have your days whenever she is down. Her problems... killing her soul little by little. But she doesn’t always want the death to be apart of her. As she fights her depression, the numbers of scars rising and the blood being lost, Ever-Grace finds herself losing herself. With the departure of her friends companionship and her boyfriend’s love, will she ever be the same ever again? Will she ever be in love with herself like she used to be? With sanity ever be apart of her everyday life like it used to be? Will it come so easily like it once was...? Will anything ever be the same like it used to be or will it ever not? There are so many questions to be answered but nothing that the tendency of being answered. As time passes by with all the stupid emotion, she loses herself. She loses the love for herself that might never return. Or will it? Nothing is guaranteed. Not even the death of me.

HELLO. IT'S ME by Cans_kray

"It's not always the tears that measure the pain. Sometimes, it's the smile we fake." Hello. It's me. I Trust You. You're the only one who is going to know all of my secrets and feelings that I don't share with anyone. I think we can be best friends. You would like to be my companion. Wouldn't you? No matter what, you're my diary afterall. ©ᴏᴩy®ɪɢʜᴛ : ᴄᴀɴꜱ_ᴋʀᴀy ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ : ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀy ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ ᴀ ꜰᴇᴡ ɪɴꜱᴛᴀɴᴄᴇꜱ ᴏʀ ꜱɪᴛᴜᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴀꜰꜰᴇᴄᴛ yᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴇxᴛᴇɴᴛ. ɪᴛ ᴀʟꜱᴏ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴜɪᴄɪᴅᴀʟ ᴀᴛᴛᴇᴍᴩᴛ.

Never Alone by __lily

Life is not easy, nor is it simple. There are always obstacles you need to get over and things preventing you from being happy. Charlotte is a 17 year old girl who understands that. She is struggling to get over the obstacles and doesn't know if she'll make it. ..... Warning: This story contains description of self-harm in almost every chapter. I didn't include a warning at the beginning of every chapter because this whole story is about mental health so anything may cause triggers. SIDE NOTE: This short story is currently undergoing MAJOR editing! The earlier chapters might not be consistent with the later chapters but the plot remains the same! The book will be all ready very soon! (Also I am very that my book description is not very good, I promise the story is much better than described)

Will it be ok? by NoBlood_Vampire

Dealing with depression is hard, but what's harder is the people around you don't notice and play it off as you are lazy. 15 year old, Hazel had been dealing with depression, anxiety, and self-harm. Life had gone downhill ever since her father had taken his own life. Her best friend, Penelope, had noticed these signs and made it her entire mission to help her. 《🎀🌸🤍📙🍊》 Or Two best friends, Hazel and Penelope, navigate a world of pain and despair from losing someone they love. They learn that having each other was important but Hazel learns how to deal with her issues while Penelope is there to hold her in this situation. 《🎀🌸🤍📙🍊》 Obvious Disclamer: Depression, anxiety attacks, and self-harm, so if those themes aren't good for you, then don't read

A Poet's Secret by ookayooh

Being in love with your best friend isn't the ideal life situation but for Zora, it's her only life situation. Secretly harboring her feelings for her best friend, Sierra, Zora pours her emotions into her journal in the form of poetry. After years of keeping her attraction for her friend at bay and trying to deny her feelings by forcing herself to love a boy who unconditionally loves her, Zora's favorite emotional outlet becomes the cause of her life falling apart as the truth finally comes out. ***** It was happening again. It was dark, sunset, I waited for her to be done with volleyball practice 'because she was my ride'. Somehow we wandered from the gym to the football field and we were sitting at the very top of the bleachers staring at each other. Her dark hair mirrored the direction of the wind, the setting sun being replaced by the brightness of her smile. We were sitting so close I could feel her warmth. It was an unusual situation. Friends don't do this. We held eye contact for a long time before I couldn't take it anymore and just closed my eyes. It wasn't real, she was just my friend. Then, I felt her tuck a strand of my curly hair behind my ear. That with the chill of the night sent shivers down my spine and a swarm of butterflies attacked my stomach. I reopened my eyes. If she didn't want me, why did she look at me that way? I held her hand and I held it for so long because I didn't know if we'd have another moment like this. We talk and laugh and she tells me I'm pretty and I ask her if she'd just noticed that and we laugh again. I realize the feelings I felt in that moment were not just the intense feelings of attraction that I felt every time I was with her. Warmth flooded to my face and if it wasn't for my dark complexion, my blush would be noticeable. I look into her dark-colored eyes and I come to the conclusion that I'm royally fucked and I'm probably also in love.

The Girl with no Emotions (GirlxGirl) by Kathy202

I was only 7 when I met her, but we had an instant connection. We were inseperable. She was always happy and joyful around me, but me on the other hand, I was a completely different story. I suffered a disorder that caused me to have no emotions. I told her my condition and she understood, but one day she dissapeared, I didn't feel sad, worried or angry like I should have. I just continued my day like any other day, but by myself. I continued to have no friends as I got older and talked to no one, but it didn't bother me. I soon became the "weirdo" as most people would say. I became known as the girl with no emotions.

Suicidal by kaii12321

This is the story of an abused teenage girl, Maddie. Her need to die has become overwhelming and she is trying to find a way to help herself before she does something she may regret. The story is told from her point of view as she recalls all that has happened to her. Maybe telling her story will help her, maybe not. This isn't just any other sob story. This is more realistic. You may even find yourself comparing your life to Maddie's while reading this story. Disclosure: I wrote this as a 13-year-old and the writing is definitely not up to my current standards, but I feel as though changing what I have already written would take away from the emotion I put into this story at 13 years old. If you'd like an updated and more well-written version, please read my other story entitled "Remembering". TW/CW: domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault, depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation

Open up (18+ Only) by RENOl_ENOLA

A 16 years old loner girl paints a perfect picture of her life,never had a best friend or anyone to talk about her messed up life apart from her now gone sister gets to work on a school project and get very close with her group mates than she expected and she feels the need to get out of her comfort zone until she realizes that one of the reasons they got close was to know how she got wrist marks while she paints a perfect picture for her so that her peers to think she's okay and perfect but is she really okay? Is the image she's painting for everyone to see true? And what happens when life tries to kill and finds new realizations and truth about her own life Will she ever be able to face her fears and ever open up even after she finds out about why they got close to her? IMPORTANT "Throughout the book there will be some mistakes and do correct when necessary" Please DO NOT copy any poem based on the moon or anything else There maybe some errors and everyone is allowed to freedom of speech. #thandiwegrace87@gmail.com

Cynical Souls by DramaQueenforreal

COMPLETED✅ Two high school teenagers finding themselves, analyzing this ever changing world, and building love. This is the type of love you wish you found in high school but probably know way too well that it only exists as fiction. Today I'm turning my fiction to reality. ❣️•••❣️ Excerpt: Just as I was about to seek shelter under some building's roof, the tires of a car come to a halt, I wonder who might pity the lonely girl walking in the rain. The passenger window rolls down, and I spot the most unexpected person seated behind the wheel. "Get in" comes out his voice, and I must've stood there agape for a few moments because next comes his rhetorical question. "Are you getting in or continuing walking in the rain?" Eyebrows raised expectantly. He sounds annoyed, like he regrets his decision to ever stop and help me. ❣️•••❣️ #5 in cynical #2 in loveandfriendship #1 in opinionated #4 in ihatelife #10 in nerdgirl #10 in HighschoolRomance #26 in GoodGirlBadBoy *contains mature themes. *contains cursing.

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Slide 1 of 10

{ #3 } Twisted Moon (MxM || 18+) cover

The Death Of Me cover

HELLO. IT'S ME cover

Never Alone cover

Will it be ok? cover

A Poet's Secret cover

The Girl with no Emotions (GirlxGirl) cover

Open up (18+ Only) cover

Cynical Souls cover

{ #3 } Twisted Moon (MxM || 18+)

Black Moon Series Book #3 Warning: #Mature #Gay #Triggering You shouldn't read this story before you have read at least I Would Give Him The Moon as you'll be missing part of the plot otherwise. My name is Camden and my friends categorize me as a sadist. A sadistic Dominant. I need to get this anger within out and I do so by inflicting mental and physical pain to my Submissives. And yet the moment I get the best kicks is through the aftercare I dispense. My soul is twisted. My past is twisted. * My name is Noah. I'm a homeless teenager who ran away from a homophobic family who never loved me because of what I supposedly did to my twin sister. I need pain to soothe my troubled mind. So I self-harm. My soul is twisted. My past is twisted. "A lifetime of consumption, They've all become the same, I punish them for pleasure, And pleasure some with pain. I punish you with pleasure, And pleasure you with pain" Thirty Seconds To Mars - End Of All Days "I wanna hide the truth I wanna shelter you But with the beast inside There's nowhere we can hide [...] When you feel my heat Look into my eyes It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide Don't get too close It's dark inside It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide" Imagine Dragons - Demons