Wasted Ink

Wasted Ink

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sat, Nov 2, 2013
Dear Emily,        I’m so sorry for it all; I never meant to hurt you. I know it’s obvious but think I still love you. I know what I said about how I won’t bother you about this subject anymore but it’s just so damn hard. I couldn’t help myself when I saw a piece of notebook paper. I was sitting on my bed, thinking about the tour, and looking at my guitar. It reminded me of you. I turned away so I wouldn’t have to look at it and saw a pink envelop, then a piece of notebook paper with the pen that I never write with. You know, I’ve never written with that pen before. I know when my dad gave it to me that it was special. I have kept that pen safe and never used since I was fourteen. Last night I used it, for you. Guess what? It write beautifully, just as beautiful as your voice when you strum your guitar. I’m sorry, I really want to change I just need to get away from love and alcohol. I want to make a deal with you. If you think I have changed after the tour, will you go out with me again? If you don’t want to, then don’t waste your time telling me no. I just wanted to tell you how I feel. Love, or hate, Harry
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A few snippets so far: I felt naked in front of him. He's stripped me bare, pulled back my flesh, cracked open my rib cage to literally have my heart in his hands. He has the power to finish me off with one forceful squeeze or help hold all the pieces together while I work on mending and healing it. **** I take this time to breathe in the stale peacefulness of the room and wait for my body to properly wake up to get started with another day. My thoughts are soon abruptly stopped when I hear heavy breathing next to me, then I can feel the rise and fall of someone's chest and the heaviness of something wrapped around my torso. The imaginary glue in my eyes disappears as they open in a flash. To my utter disbelief and confusion, I find Harry sleeping...in my bed...with me. What, when how...what in the world is happening?! My internal panic worsens when I realize if he's here he saw the broken glass and blood in the room. FUCKING HELL! "Don't freak out, don't freak out," I talk out loud to myself but it's not fucking working. **** Last fucking chance to tell me I'm wrong and you're not hoeing around then sleep in my bed!" I say as harshly as I can. She doesn't say anything, doesn't even bat an eye at what I said. I pick up her phone on my nightstand and throw it at the closed door and watch her body tense up in anger. Her fists are white from how tightly she is clamping her fingers in her palm and her jaw is clenched. "You said it yourself, we're just friends. Friends don't act jealous like this," she quietly speaks. "I am not jealous; I couldn't give a fuck less. Have nothing to be jealous of." She takes a step back like I hit her, I can see her shattering right in front of me. "You know your way out. Get the fuck out of my apartment now," she walks over to grab her phone that bounced off the wall and walks out, she stops before she closes the door all the way.

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