True Love story

I have only written a few paragraphs but from what you see written and published please comment and help me with this story. Help me make it more interesting.

Okay so, A girl (Lucy) has some extremely important news she has to tell her family, not good news, and all she can think in her head is what happened how it happened flash backs and what her over protective annoying father is going to do as a consequence, this is all happening while standing just her parents house and Lucy needs to tell her parents the big ( not so good) news to her parents but then she gets a phone call from her fiance and that becomes to bombs hit on her parents both in the same night, how is her family going to cope with the (not so good) news?