Faded

"You're an idiot", i said with a nonchalant tone to my voice. Pretending not to care of an uncomfortable topic that rose out of honest to god, nowhere. I turned to give my best friend a good, long, bored stare. Yet, of course, the way my stomach turned and my chest tightened would make it sickly obvious that i as a matter of fact do care.

"Dude, think about it. Try to imagine yourself in my shoes. If you were with some hot as chick. And you absolutely loved everything about her, her laugh, her smile, they way her hair flows in the wind like a-"

"I get it." i rudely interrupted him, "i get it, you are in love. I see that, now can you please stop talking about it. You've been getting rather annoying and I'd like to go back to reading." i finished with a stressed sigh and quietly rose from the purple bean bag i was sitting on, book in my right hand as i clutched my fingers around the spine so hard my knuckles could have turned white with irritation.

I am aware that i might of been a bit harsh but my inner turmoil didn't allow me to register the look of shock on his face when i walked away from the bed he was currently sitting on and made my way to the door of his bedroom. Selfish thoughts fogged my brain as i mindlessly opened the bedroom door, walked the hall of the *insert family name here* residence, and descended the skeletal spiral stairs to the kitchen.

"Why does he flaunt his love life like that?

Can't he see I'm miserable as he tells me this?

Of how much he loves her?

Of how much they love each other?

Of how he found what gives him happiness?

Of how i desperatly wished i was the source of his great happiness?

And how I'll never be able to know how it feels....

To be truly happy."