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Some days I feel like I don't know what my purpose is. And I know lots of people feel that way. Many of us wander around in this life working jobs because we need money. We talk to the people we talk to because they are convenient. We do what we think is right until we feel in our hearts that we are unhappy. I do not know what would ultimately make me happy. I value my success, my career, my identity as an individual highly. I also value my ability to love and be loved, to have my freedom, to hopefully spread happiness to other people. Life is an incredible journey and we are never sure of where we are on that journey. We have feelings and experiences that we try to digest. We try to gain meaning from the things that happen in our lives. Mindfulness is the challenge I have been given. To be mindful of what is happening in my life now, today, what I am doing for myself today. Having a mental illness makes that difficult but I do try. Despite the days where I feel helpless, I have days where I feel empowered. It is knowing there will be a day where I will be satisfied with my choices in life that keeps me trying to make my life a success...in whatever capacity will make me happy.
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