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Self Deception

SempiternalEmoSongsx

Reads 2,506
Votes 611
Parts 119
Time 4h 8m

Reads 2,506
Votes 611
Parts 119
Time 4h 8m

SempiternalEmoSongsx

Mature

2017 2018 anger blood columbine creative dark death grunge insane life love mentalillness poetry psychosis realityisntreal rhyme schizophrenia tcc truecrime

Poetry 2017 
And if I burn out in a fit of psychosis, remember me as a young god, with that smile made of daggers, even if I was the most dangerous thing you could've touched. Perhaps all that danger comes from the multiple personalities, but all I know is I've got something fucking with me, and it possesses me until my pupils don't even exist and the immaterial spills from my nose like concrete. It's time to disconnect, I've made such a mess of myself. When reality unhinges itself and all you can do is watch your sanity slip through your fingers, you start to understand what value truly is, because it's looking a lot like the black tar on the walls. I've lost myself to a pill bottle of prescribed obsession, but everything's feeling so timed. What is it you see when you look through these screens into my soul?All Rights Reserved

2017 2018 anger blood columbine creative dark death grunge insane life love mentalillness poetry psychosis realityisntreal rhyme schizophrenia tcc truecrime

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119 parts

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Paint Us Gray: Part 1 by actressesumner

Rejection. Betrayal. Heartbreak. Grief. Unfortunately, we've all had a swallow, some more than others, of this bitter brew. This is just a sliver of my chapter that is a part of this world's grand narrative; it's about one person's toe dipping into the brokenness of the Earth, and the ripples, waves, tsunamis it created in her life. A couple of months ago, while consoling a friend grieving the loss of a relationship, he asked me a question no one had ever asked me before. A very vulnerable and powerful question. I had been sharing some of my own similar experiences with him when he messaged me that life changing question, "And, what did you see at the top of the mountain?" While his words were just letters on a screen, I could see the hunger in his eyes, hear the desperation in his voice, sense the overwhelming thirst of a person climbing up an incredibly steep and treacherous mountain. What did I see at the top of the mountain? This book is my answer to this question. Let's go for a hike.

paracosm-delusional nightmares by paracosmic_being

{poetry : completed} "𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐤𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐞." in a tiny corner of the world, but in the vast corner of my imagination, this is my paracosmic delusion, something that i've created out of indignant, dejected and euphoric emotions. each word in this book constitutes my delusional nightmares, the ones that i know aren't really there, yet i write about them anyway. this is me, my barest and deepest feelings, and my monstrous thoughts. ✦✦✦ {all rights reserved || ©2021, ashe} {published on may 30, 2021} {cover designed by @paracosmic_being} {peace \/}

The Days With No Sun by hello-no-one

Sometimes we fear truth over reality. But things get dark and heavy and we play the blame game. We end up hurting others or ourselves even. We don't think before we act or we don't say before we do. This is the evolution of my madness. A cluster of rants and thoughts and poems for you guys. Everything is written how I wanted it to be rants will be long with few pauses and there will be mistakes I might have skipped over. Aha. Poems at the beginning from when I was 15 years old to now when Im 18. Truly a visual of my writing evolution. Edited by @ChemicalStarling who writes a lot but never posts! Read on, loves. I'll see you on the other side...

Wake Up Call by VictoriaAshleyAuthor

A broken girl... Twenty years old and I'd finally had enough. I couldn't take anymore, so I packed up my things and disappeared, leaving behind my drunken, abusive father and the mother that stood by and watched as I slowly died. I knew I was going, but not where I'd stop. The last thing I expected once on my own, was to be spending my nights stripping at a club in Florida, barely getting by. I should have known running from a past wouldn't make it stop haunting me, because misery will always find me and tear me down until there's nothing left of me. It always has... Things can always change though, right? Like looking up at a handsome, tattooed stranger, and with one stare he has me questioning everything I've ever believed in. I wasn't expecting or prepared for someone to storm into my life. Not him. Jace Montgomery. The name I'll never forget. The need to save me lies in his eyes, but I don't need a savior. Trust- what he wants to teach me. That I'm something more than what I've grown up believing and that I'm worth loving. Those are the things he wants me to believe. How am I supposed to let him in and show me I'm something when I've spent my entire life being... nothing? He won't give up, and honestly, I'm hoping he never does... Because maybe... just maybe... I am worth saving after all.

A Poet's Secret by ookayooh

Being in love with your best friend isn't the ideal life situation but for Zora, it's her only life situation. Secretly harboring her feelings for her best friend, Sierra, Zora pours her emotions into her journal in the form of poetry. After years of keeping her attraction for her friend at bay and trying to deny her feelings by forcing herself to love a boy who unconditionally loves her, Zora's favorite emotional outlet becomes the cause of her life falling apart as the truth finally comes out. ***** It was happening again. It was dark, sunset, I waited for her to be done with volleyball practice 'because she was my ride'. Somehow we wandered from the gym to the football field and we were sitting at the very top of the bleachers staring at each other. Her dark hair mirrored the direction of the wind, the setting sun being replaced by the brightness of her smile. We were sitting so close I could feel her warmth. It was an unusual situation. Friends don't do this. We held eye contact for a long time before I couldn't take it anymore and just closed my eyes. It wasn't real, she was just my friend. Then, I felt her tuck a strand of my curly hair behind my ear. That with the chill of the night sent shivers down my spine and a swarm of butterflies attacked my stomach. I reopened my eyes. If she didn't want me, why did she look at me that way? I held her hand and I held it for so long because I didn't know if we'd have another moment like this. We talk and laugh and she tells me I'm pretty and I ask her if she'd just noticed that and we laugh again. I realize the feelings I felt in that moment were not just the intense feelings of attraction that I felt every time I was with her. Warmth flooded to my face and if it wasn't for my dark complexion, my blush would be noticeable. I look into her dark-colored eyes and I come to the conclusion that I'm royally fucked and I'm probably also in love.

Atlantis Academy: The First Element by AutumnKalquist

Five Star Reviews for Atlantis Academy: "Omg this book was amazing I couldn't put it down or stop reading. I carried it with me open on my phone while I did everything just to keep reading. I need more of all of this. Epic story, epic content, epic visuals, just epic. LOVE THIS!" "Once I got into this story, I did not stop reading it. This is a beautiful story about a very awkward girl who is riven with so much pain and angst and yet... this makes her who she is and shapes her into the person she will become. The world she finds herself awakened to is magical and yet filled with the all-too-familiar cliques and tribes of the very human people who inhabit it. One word to describe the story: beautiful!" "The story pulls you headlong to the end and leaves you wanting to shout "No! Not yet!" ...If there were 6 stars, I would have given it that." *** Humanity is one secret society away from extinction. The children of Atlantis use magic to keep us safe. If they make it through the Academy. Hi, I'm Lyric. And I'm kind of a mess. ADHD, that's me. I'm a high school drop-out, late everywhere I go, and one screw-up away from being homeless. I'm a loner, and I like it that way. Who needs friends when you have a Redwood forest nearby? Trees never bully me like the kids did at school. Or get drunk and throw things at my head. After my mom died, I figured life couldn't get much worse. I thought it might even get better. Ha. The universe has a great sense of humor. I should've listened to the rumors about evil spirits. About the angry, ancient magical creatures haunting our small Oregon Coast town. But did I? No. That was my first mistake. And it might be my last. 'Cause now I'm in a battle for my life. A whole new world has opened up... a magical world I don't understand. And the blood in my veins says I belong here. But I have to prove myself to save myself. And when have I ever done that?

In The End No One is Okay by you-Are-amazing

Hello, person whom must be reading this, my name is Jay, I write a lot of poems. So this will be a place I'll write them down for whom ever wants ideas, feels lonely, or wants to read. Whatever it may be, keep in mind there are trigger warnings, deep subjects, and fair amounts of fear. Enjoy and read at your own risk. March 17: #7 in Poetry March 22: #2 in Sadpoems March 19: #3 in lovepoem June 9: #1 in freshmeat

Trapped in my own head by WildImaginations16

She is an outcast. She finds it easier to express what she feels in the form of writing. Whether it is poems, letters or long texts. These are poems that she writes trying to describe how it feels to live with certain mental health issues, in a world that disregards outcasts. So, these are on the darker side of the spectrum. Some poems might be distressing for some readers. I personally enjoy consuming dark content, it's kinda like a coping mechanism. I really hope none of you relate with any of these :) I'll be posting only poems here, I'll try to be as active as I can. The poems are not in any order. They are just the thoughts that pop up any time of the day. (8.11.2023) PS: Please check out 'safe space'. I need your help to make it a real safe space, readers! Ranking: #1 shortpoem #1 distressing #1 poetry (17.1.2024) #1 poem (24.1.2024)

Emotional Amnesia by CAKerst

Sometimes when I say "I'm okay", I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight and say, "I know you're not". I have felt like this many times in my life; as a kid, teenager and as an adult. I have seen many things in my life and felt even more things that has been horribly depressing... But I got up. I stood up to walk on for another day. I dealt with my emotional amnesia the only way I knew I could and that was by writing it out into poetry. I wanted to forget my pain and forget what I was going through. I needed that cut of the blade or a pill to drink to take everything away. My poetry became both my pill and my blade... Now I share the most intimate part of myself with the world. The part of me I kept hidden in the closet. The part I never thought I would ever present to the world. Now is the time I have to stop having amnesia about my emotions. It is time to learn, to better myself and to stand up and remember the things that I shut out like a voluntary amnesia all these years. Those who are offended after reading this - f**k you! If you are sad with me and willing to cut your wrist - I know how you feel! If you just enjoy the words - I love you! #679 in Poetry on 17/03/2018 #779 in Poetry on 18/03/2018 #807 in Poetry on 19/03/2018 #474 in Poetry on 22/03/2018

NOW YOU SEE," THE REAL ME" UNDER MAJOR EDITING by darkxdestruction

NOW YOU SEE "THE REAL ME" #1 IN THE SERIES OF POETRY BOOKS //SAD POETRY EDITION (under major editing) "My heart was taken by you, broken by you, and now it's in pieces because of you" My poems aren't the best. The first few poems may not seem worthy of being read but... later down in the book they get better. To some, my poems are beautiful; to some, my poems are shitty and they are rubbish💀. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! I can't promise that your time won't be wasted reading this book. I'm not a professional poet so expect the worst. This book isn't for everyone. It's sad, a little motivating and dark. If you aren't into sad poems don't read this book, it isn't for you. This book contains some of my thoughts,mostly about me or the people around me or just society in general. If you are feeling sad or depressed, please seek help. I know how much it hurts but it isn't too late to heal. Cover made on postermywall ♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡.｡♥*♡∞:｡ Rankings: #1 in sad poet out of 23 07/25/2021 #2 in deep thought out of 4. 8 K stories 07/25/2021 #2 in thoughts out of 73. 4 K stories 07/25/2021 #3 in sad poems out of 10.1 K stories 07/25/2021 #3 in thoughts and feelings out of 10.1 K stories 07/25/2021 #6 in poet out of 14.3 K stories 07/25/2021 #40 in deep out of 26.6 K stories 07/25/2021 #48 in depressing out of 18. 3 K stories 07/25/2021

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Slide 1 of 10

Paint Us Gray: Part 1 cover

paracosm-delusional nightmares cover

The Days With No Sun cover

Wake Up Call cover

A Poet's Secret cover

Atlantis Academy: The First Element cover

In The End No One is Okay cover

Trapped in my own head cover

Emotional Amnesia cover

NOW YOU SEE," THE REAL ME" UNDER MAJOR EDITING cover

Paint Us Gray: Part 1

Rejection. Betrayal. Heartbreak. Grief. Unfortunately, we've all had a swallow, some more than others, of this bitter brew. This is just a sliver of my chapter that is a part of this world's grand narrative; it's about one person's toe dipping into the brokenness of the Earth, and the ripples, waves, tsunamis it created in her life. A couple of months ago, while consoling a friend grieving the loss of a relationship, he asked me a question no one had ever asked me before. A very vulnerable and powerful question. I had been sharing some of my own similar experiences with him when he messaged me that life changing question, "And, what did you see at the top of the mountain?" While his words were just letters on a screen, I could see the hunger in his eyes, hear the desperation in his voice, sense the overwhelming thirst of a person climbing up an incredibly steep and treacherous mountain. What did I see at the top of the mountain? This book is my answer to this question. Let's go for a hike.