Ambivalent Stories

Evanescent were my thoughts, Until the sight of you became manifested in my daydreams, And I find myself ambivalent~ thinking unrequited love renders me unwilling to let go, but knowing, with miserable rumination, that the heart only heals when I Move on

This is a story about a person, a child. An emotion child, who can't decide if they deserve anything. They fumble around in the blinding darkness trying to make decisions and figure out if being pitiful makes any difference to their self image. They have a somewhat normal life- and they know it- but why does it feel so wrong, so shaken up? So many questions, so much time. Too many mistakes made, yet they can't learn from these stabbing blunders. Yearning to be something bigger, something important, they make new questions beyond their age. Forged from the fuck-ups, can our protagonist live a simple life with complicated mind? **WARNING** BOOK CONTAINS SUICIDAL ACTIONS HARMFUL ACTIONS LANGUAGE CRAPPY WRITING OTHER POSSIBLY DISTURBING STUFF Copyright c 2020 by Lawrence **** All rights reserved. Published by me. (And Wattpad.) No part of this story may be reproduced in any form and in any way without permission or license from the creator. (Me.)

Literally just random musings inspired from my own life; perhaps no head or toe to them without context, but hey, it's how I'd like it to be. For the most part, anyway.

Why do I love you if you only cause me pain? (Poetry)

"your love is like a deadly drug little mouse, it killing me yet I need it badly" "you're just a killer!! stay away from me you bastard!! he wasn't just the murderer he was the devil himself "you wanna escape,try my love....even death can't do us apart little mouse" "please let me go, let me go, PLEASE LET ME GO!!!" "we're not who we used to be" "Run little mouse, this time there will be no one chasing you " "all I knew was, he set me ablaze, and I never wanted the fire to go out " "not all stories have happy endings" "this time, I won't let you go little mouse....." now I was here on his grave. remembering time we spent together not a fairytale "we were supposed to have a happy ending " "I need you as much as I hate you" "ours is the type of love that was cursed " "in the end it's you and me " "afterall I'll kill everyone who will come in between us"

"If ye' don't open your eyes, you'll never see what's right in front of ye' " U N E D I T E D

Here's my December thoughts while silently fighting my depression. I hope you can appreciate my poems!

Roshan always knew what he wanted and when he didn't he just winged it. Growing up in a country which wasn't his own but still felt like he belonged was enough for him to make it his home. He had it all at least he thought he did. All that changed when he went to a party he wasn't suppose to attend and bumped into her while she listened to her own aunties bad mouth her mother and herself. From then he knew he had to have her. It didn't matter who or what was in his way which included his mother, the girl his mother promised would have him and his best friend.

Cannon is a sweet girl but has lost the feeling of extreme emotions due to past trauma. She meets someone that shows her the world in a new light, the time she spends with him makes her see the world differently. With more color and life to it. The ups and downs they experience together are more than she's ever felt, and while she discovers new feelings and emotions that she hasn't felt in years, something occurs that makes all the things she feels, no they both feel, seem worthless. Read my book now:)

Everything is false. But with a person struggling with anxiety, anything can be true. Walk into this unplotted collection of short stories updated by someone who can relate to the terrors this/these character(s) face(s) with anxiety and, most probably clinical, depression. It has a romantic twinge - in fact, it is all about romance, but with the awkward anxious factor.

Not just a basic love story or friendship. There's more beyond what the eye meets. One story Two minds. This is the Ambivalent Series where you can see not only the perspective of one character but other books for different characters have been RELEASED and soon will a book specifically focusing on a sneak peak of someone's past, who's past?. You'll see very soon so pay attention and don't miss out. Each book will have a name attached to its title so you can know who's book it belongs to maybe you can spot them on different books other then their own. TAKE NOTE OF THIS: Please feel free to comment but make sure to keep the comments appropriate and don't ruin the fun for other readers by spoiling. Keep the environment friendly :) BTW The Unexpected Turn: Lilly Rain Adams is out and so is The Unspoken mind: Diana Phillip Enjoy! :)

2 schoolmates who started hating each other but were meant to be. they thought they never would love the other, but what if they fall for each other subconsciously? what will their futures be? a story of two young people getting an arranged marriage that will change their future. Park Seorin, the inexperienced lover Kang Daniel, trapped in a psychotic girlfriend's controlling world blurb: I shouldn't have loved you. loving you was my mistake. the biggest mistake I ever made. and now I regret it. ~Park Seorin [STATUS: ONGOING] <<MY FIRST FF>>

"please.. let me be with you, you promised that you'll never leave me" He begged. "I don't make promises and you already know that" She stated. "You're the worst liar Chel.. I hate you" "Love is cruel, isn't it?" She uttered. What do you think will happen if two enemies fall for each other?

This is a story of a young boy named jonathon who just want to know more about himself but at the same time he got a crush on a lady named clara. He wants everything but life makes it hard for him to get everything that he wants, therefore he gotta lose himself for her and lose alot of friends. <More bio will update>

These are short poems about this girl and a guy how they met how they fell in love even though they shared nothing in common ...he was the popular guy well the typical bad boy and she was the quiet not so popular girl... and the poems are her unsent letters to him about how she felt trap now that she is with him , she does not know who she is anymore

This is an anthology of poems that depicts the hopes and struggles of a formerly broken and lost soul during his long and hard battle with demons from the past as well as the struggles he faces as of writing each of these poetic stories. This is myself I am referring to and I believe that any 'good' and brutally honest story can only be written in a moment at which the most overwhelming emotions can be felt in every fiber of one's being; and my personal inspiration comes from, predominantly, the deepest despair and then then the fiercest of hope. This is a small portion of my blessings from God that can be interpreted, or even, as they most often are, misinterpreted in any way the readers' thoughts and feelings may sway them to. I would urge caution to all readers who might have faced similar, or even vastly different but similarly devastating struggles, to abstain from reading these poems any further when they feel likely to be overcome with any subtle thought of relapse, including mental, emotional, physical, as well as spiritual relapse. As for those seeking someone with whom they can relate, someone who can show them that they are not alone in this dark and depraved world: Read this at your own leisure and please do enjoy.

I'm depressed and corny, lemme be