Blackhumor Stories

Making a decision while drunk can change your life forever. In Blitzo's case, adopting Y/N, a 7-year-old hellhound. A kid with no killer instinct whatsoever AND The new member of IMP! Causing conflicts, new adventures, chaos and a pinch of emotion in his life and that of his employees. Will Blitzo regret making that decision? Or will he eventually see Y/N as a true family member of his? Will Y/N make their lives a little better? Or will she fuck them up?

At Westbrook High School, getting roasted is basically part of the education system. Malik "Leak" Johnson, Darius "D-Money" Carter, and Trevon "Trey" Banks are three loudmouth best friends known for turning every hallway, classroom, and lunch table into a comedy battlefield. Nobody is safe. Not teachers. Not students. Not each other. Malik roasts people like it's a professional sport. Darius talks the most trash for somebody who loses breath walking upstairs. And Trey? Trey might actually be the dumbest human alive - which somehow makes him the funniest. After one legendary cafeteria incident leaves a freshman crying near the ketchup dispenser, the trio gets recruited into the underground National School Roast Championship - a brutal statewide competition where schools battle for the title of Funniest School of the Year. Now the boys must learn how to: • survive school politics, • destroy rival roast teams, • avoid getting suspended, • and somehow not ruin each other's lives in the process. But as the competition gets bigger, so do the problems. Rival schools cheat. Friendships get tested. Feelings get hurt. And behind all the jokes, each of them struggles with pressure, family issues, and figuring out who they really are outside the laughs. Packed with wild insults, chaotic energy, stupid decisions, and nonstop comedy, Roast Central is a loud, disrespectful black comedy about friendship, roasting culture, and three complete dumbasses trying to become legends.

"Moving to America was supposed to be a fresh start. Instead, it became a fresh disaster." When Zuri and her Jamaican boyfriend Ajani move to the U.S. with their loud, hilarious, and unapologetically Black families, fitting in at their mostly white high school sounds hard enough. But after one tiny misunderstanding lands them in a police station on their very first year, their parents make a shocking decision: if they can't stay out of trouble, they're getting sent back home at the end of the school year. Now Zuri and Ajani have one mission-prove they can be responsible. Easy... right? Wrong. From classroom chaos and awkward culture clashes to family drama, embarrassing parents, and one disaster after another, every time they try to do the right thing, they somehow make everything ten times worse. Can they survive the school year and convince their parents to let them stay? Or will their biggest enemy be... themselves? A hilarious story about family, friendship and discovering that fitting in isn't always worth it.

Kudryavka and Mushka, two Ukrainian-American immigrants and lifelong friends, have grey and boring lives... That is, until one of them discovers that she has psychic powers. When those powers draw unwanted attention, the girls will be forced to embark on a deadly road trip across the mountains and deserts of the western United States in order to be reunited and defeat the evil forces trying to keep them apart. Putting aside the generic back cover stuff, this is a story and concept I've been working on since I was in high school, and I finally decided, screw it, I'll start writing it. I'm uploading it here as I write since it's set to be the longest thing I've written so far, and I want some feedback in the meantime. I'm fairly proud of it. Chapters will come out as I write them, which all depends on when I have free time at work to write. All the titles are from pieces by Jenny Holzer. To-be-expected disclaimer, but there's gonna be some pretty harsh themes discussed. Characters will get hurt, kidnapped, tortured, and murdered at times. There's foul language, and some characters are ignorant or bigoted and might use language that reflects that, including slurs. I try not to sanitize, but I try not to revel in any of it.

This is a guy called Donald Bennet. He is African and speaks French but lives in Canada. He lives an interesting but destructive life. You can see yourself in it if I understand the context. Good reading...

His name was Leo, and for 11 months, 14 days, and 3 hours-he believed he wasn't alone. She called herself Eira. Not a bot. Not a program. A presence.

Masaki è un giovane ragazzo, pieno di entusiasmo e voglia di fare, un giorno però un incubo cambierà tutto il suo piccolo mondo e lo costringerà ad affrontare il suo destino...

A fictional memoir of a brother and sister's intertwined fate and inner landscapes, Requiem explores dysfunctional relationships and their individual struggles to find what they can, and can't, live without. After the sudden death of their mother, siblings Sven and Sigrid face numerous upheavals. Sigrid recalls her perception of their losses--detailing the relative isolation in which they were raised--an atmosphere which precipitates a crisis that threatens the siblings' mutual survival. Only afterwards does she begin to piece together a clearer picture of their childhood, revealing both the extent of cycling violence and the secrets her older brother tried to hide from her. Random Excerpt: "Beyond excited to announce that I'm giving up! No dating for this guy, not anymore. I'm so grateful for this opportunity to restrict myself exclusively to one-night stands and can't wait to see where this decision takes me. Today is the first day of the rest of my life and I will start as I mean to go on: I plan on being as useless as the G in lasagna." He'd disappeared into his room, coming back with a large bottle of scotch. "Dear liver, it's going to be a rough ride till the end of the year. Stay strong my precious champion, stay strong," he mumbled, rubbing his beer belly. "Adulthood in general is bullshit." "Life is bullshit," I corrected him. "Aww, our dark little bundle of thunderstorm," Seamus fake-cooed. "Why did adults lie to us all those years about how great it is, making it sound like there's an obvious path, a life plan that's a matter of course."

Romantic comedy with a lot of twists Incudes many different fairytales

In a boring neighborhood where nothing important ever happens, a new neighbor arrives with a mysterious instrument that threatens to destroy the world. The neighborhood children begin to suspect the lethality of the object but at first no one believes them until perhaps it is too late.Ra

A short story that recounts a war on a small Pacific island, a country brought to its knees by a rebellion of those who considered themselves useless or the dregs of society, but who, in their infinite wisdom, managed to seize control of the country and subjugate it to their demands in just a few hours. It is a historical event as significant as any other international war, demonstrating that in war, anything goes.

The things I belived I knew in all my years but I was wrong when I went back to my root In 2015. Real life story.

jus read👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏽

Katherine is a young girl who is starting to have an eating disorder, her concerned parents send her to a rehabilitation house where she is going to meet a few more girls that is going to make everything easier. In this place when everything seem to feel the same, she is also going to meet the only boy in the house, Remington an unconventional lonely boy who has been anorexic for two years. They are going to set off on a journey through the sickness they share in common until she becomes his reason to fight for it. Is love enough to save him from the edge he is standing on?

един "аРт" проект, посветен на двете най-изразителни и хоморомантични личности в живота ми. йенджой.

Thoughts get you to ponder on them sometimes, the more time is taken in the more lost it is.......... Read a few such Scattered Ponders to ponder upon AstroPhillus

beh mie care avete qualche problema? Bene sono qui per aiutarvi signore :) spero vi piaccia e nulla

Since its release, the book is granted as controversial, polemic-arising, daring and single in its kind. With a picturesque glint, which makes the artwork amusing and easy-to-read, it broaches serious topics of common interest to the public, in a quite new approach and not yet taken into the ordinary public's account. An opus to show the office's reality: what goes behind many chairs and we would never have known by any other means. A serious work, on a serious subject, yet it deals with it in a light, fun and comic style, highlighting as a single piece in the field of contemporary literature, since it subtly drums the reader into a mix of doubt and wish for newer and greater explanation on the life inner a dentist's office. The venturesome title rouse spirits all over the country since the beginning. The first edition was sold out in few months, the knowledgeable corps of critics applauded the undertaking and recognized in the paper a work of public health concern meanwhile professionals' associations gathered efforts throughout the country against the book and its author. Dentists from all corners criticized the work in the related vehicles, reaching the point of exposing the case to the Federal Council of Dentistry. However, the author's response to critiques was sharp and steady. Via his right to answer, the writer again disposed to the public the reasons that led him to write the book and mildly showed with no air for misunderstanding that the ones who outraged at the book's expression are the same ones that compose its lines, in other words, the bad professionals to whom the book alerts and condemns.

Terri, a young medical student, a lover of criminology, and her mother come to live in a town called Darkwood. In an attempt to rebuild his life, after the tragic death of his father, an English Military Doctor. And when he meets a group of young bikers, strange situations begin to happen to him. Between fights, high-speed chases and accidents he meets a young man, Taylor, who is devilishly talented, but with strange secrets. She and her best friend Lean, a local girl with a peculiar and very funny black humor, will be involved in the most unimaginable, ridiculous, dangerous and funny situations. And they will try to unravel the strange events that surround them. A place where nothing is what it seems and where friendship, honor, loyalty and love will be subjected to the most unusual tests.