Darkhumor Stories

Welcome to planet Talvaris, your generic isekai world filled with magic, dragons, and voluptuous female elves who look like they escaped from an illustrators search history. Everything here is as beautiful as the goddess Celes envision it, if you just ignore the slavery and racism on the corner. Unfortunately, maintaining this picturesque fantasy realm costs divine power. Luckily for the goddess, divine power can be charged by the Talvarians' prayer. And nothing beats the high-quality prayer of a Talvarian during the act of killing or being killed. That's why the occasional demon invasions are needed, oh and the OP otherworlder hero is also needed to tone down the invasion. Nobody wants the sweet Talvarians to get wiped out, right? But this time the celestial HR department makes a mistake. Alex Solomon is not a teenager, not handsome, and definitely not a Japanese. He is just a regular pot belly millennials who spend most of his time looking at the screen every day, just like the one who reading this now. Totally doesn't meet the goddess's standards. Hence, the beautiful but angry goddess cursed Alex Solomon to become an orc and banish him to the Demon Kingdom with nothing but a ability to access Earth internet. Stuck among demons, Alex Solomon decide if the goddess wants him to be a monster, he'll be the worst kind possible - a monster with ideas. Armed with memes, wikipedia articles, and misquoted great thinker, he and the demon army set out on a quest for revenge by doing the most disruptive thing that have been proven on earth: Building world peace, freedom, and democracy across Talvaris. One Tomahawk missile at a time. New Chapters every Tuesday & Friday For 30 chapters ahead, you can check at RR For 40 chapters ahead, you can check and support my patreon at patreon.com/Bimbanana

On the continent of Adriala, humankind lives in perfect peace with nature. On their thirteenth birthday each citizen receives a divine blessing from the Alverian Goddess. However, its citizens believe that since their blessings make everyone happy, people are incapable of violence. Soon unexplainable deaths and disappearances challenge the prevailing teachings of the Alverian church. In response to the bizarre occurrences a unique team of heretics will use their knowledge of the dead to expose the truth.

It's all started when red thread of fate tied them together the more they know each other , the more they get obsessed with eachother But what will happen when he get to know the girl he wants to destroy she's already destroyed , brutally Broken , beyond his imagination Be ready to experience not so ordinary love story of broken soul and beast mafia who find their obsession for eachother , their solace in eachother , who loved each other like there is no tomorrow and who can burn whole world for each other Story about love , past trouma , survival and rescue. Give this story a chance and find out all by yourself ❤️

A noble's wife has many roles to play: a status symbol of her husband, a negotiating asset for the family, a decorative piece to complete the household. And yet, when Duke Martin the Second of Donau acquires Mary, a woman from a neighboring conquered nation... well, he gets far more than he bargained for. The story is already completed on AO3.

Eighteen-year-old Feenix DeSuza has a secret. Inside his hidden terrarium, he's discovered something that could doom his entire colony: Earth's oxygen will run out by winter. But when Feenix tries to warn them, nobody listens. Instead, his colony turns against him, and he's exiled into a world where every breath could be his last. His only hope is the one person he should never trust-a sworn enemy feared as a cannibal fiend. Gidget. Forced to follow her deep into the dead air in pursuit of a mysterious signal, Feenix expects betrayal, bloodshed, and probably to end up as dinner. What he doesn't expect is to discover that there's far more to Gidget than the monster he's been taught to fear. Together they are humanity's last hope. And its final breath.

(new chapter every Monday!) New mission. Same chaos. Worse dress code. It's been exactly three days since Tony-a perfectly ordinary, slightly awkward high school guy-accidentally unlocked a power system fueled by raw, unhinged human emotion. When he transforms, he doesn't just put on a costume; he undergoes a complete biological shift into Pink, a petite, hyper-protective, hammer-wielding magical girl who happens to be his own louder, sassier subconscious. In less than seventy-two hours, Tony and his squad of beautifully traumatized teammates have shattered localized physics, leveled a neighborhood diner, and accidentally rewritten the multiversal rulebook. Naturally, the corporate overlords took notice. Slammed face-first into the interdimensional hub of The Sparkle Syndicate, Team 7-A is about to face their most terrifying threat yet: a mandatory corporate onboarding. The Syndicate treats saving the universe like a competitive 9-to-5 desk job, tracks emotional magic on a standardized spreadsheet, and issues corporate life insurance in case a teammate goes missing on a mission. Even worse? Because Tony's raw, boundless power completely breaks their clinical scanning metrics, the Syndicate's computers registered him as having zero baseline magic. And according to strict corporate protocol, the Syndicate always thrusts the absolute weakest, most useless lightweight into the leadership role to force them to grow. Now, a teenage boy who biologically transforms into a magical girl...who also happens to look like she could headline a glittery pop concert... is the official corporate-appointed CEO of a squad of absolute freaks. The Syndicate thinks they can manage them, balance their stats, and force them to clock in. They have absolutely no idea what they just signed up for.

Stuck in the same boring routine, (Name) (Last Name) is depressed. Wake up, school (in which she faces endless bullying), go back, study, again and again. The only thing keeping her sane, is her favorite anime, My Hero Academia. But, alas, you can't have everything, so weekends aren't great either. (Name)'s parents either fight and scream at each other, or just ignore everyone. Her older brother? Drowned in the work of high school and friends to busy to even say a word to her. So when (Name) just simply...vanishes from her bed one night after making a wish, she realizes, she's got a new chance. Bakugo x fem! nerdish! Reader

No one came to bury the old woman. No one mourned her. But when two drunken gravediggers decide to rob the grave of a wealthy woman buried a year earlier, they soon discover that some treasures are better left underground. A string of pearls. A forgotten sin.

All Serena Sedna wanted was to earn enough to leave the fish-scented docks of Salmon Port behind for a new life in Aarman City. But when a train breakdown stranding her, and adding a problem in the form of Neyon-a mysterious, socially awkward outsider with high-tech gear and a quiet, heavy guilt, leading her to unwanted adventure underwater

Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy, Isekai, Magic, Sci-Fi, Shounen, Supernatural Synopsis: An ordinary man in his 20s died trying to save someone, only to end up dead. When he woke up, he found that he had become a girl, a character from the Light Novel he was familiar with. Disclaimer: I do not own the game/story of Honkai: Star Rail and A Certain Magical Index. All credits to the original owners, HoyoVerse and Kamachi Kazuma I also do not own the pictures and illustrations that I will be using in the story. All credits go to the original Artist.

Four friends. One remote forest road. And a 2005 hatchback that decides to die at the worst possible moment. When Aarav, Rohan, Kabir, and Priya get stranded near an eerie, isolated mansion, they step inside just to escape the midnight chill. But sitting in the foyer is an old woman in a white saree with a terrifying message: this land is cursed. Before they can even process her warning, the old woman levitates five feet into the air with jet-black eyes and a demonic roar. Naturally, the boys scream, sprint two miles without looking back, and vow never to return. There's just one tiny problem... When they finally send a driver to tow the "broken" car back, the engine starts on the very first try. What really happened inside that mansion? A dark comedy short story about four grown adults scaring themselves half to death over an old lady drinking tea

This is a zombie AU of Spy School by Stuart Gibbs. In this, Erica, Ben and Mike have to figure out who/what infected Zoe. Then, they have to figure out how to convert Zoe back without either killing her, nor infecting them. I changed Zoe's personality a little. Though, the changes are because of the virus. Stuart Gibbs owns all of the characters, and I just made the plot. Zoe named it Triple Z because it wasn't meant to have a name. This is in Zoe's POV. This is my first time ever writing in Zoe's Point of View. There won't be that much gore. Mainly zombie jokes and some just are a little creepy. People will still get infected. Though, if you are scared easily when it comes to reading stuff like this, don't read. This kind of takes place after book eight, so spoilers if you haven't read that. And I did think out the zombie rules if you have any questions. Not heavy romance. Mostly physiological horror.

How many people do you know who have died and come back to life? You're about to meet one. My name is Kelly. On the morning of October 3rd, I hit Send on what I thought was just another slightly snarky work email. I never got to see if they replied. The next thing I knew... I woke up restrained to a hospital bed in the ICU. Everyone kept telling me I was a miracle. I had no idea why. This isn't a self-help book. This isn't an inspirational memoir. It's the story of what actually happened... Told by the person who had to wake up and live it. Apparently, I died. This is the part nobody tells you about.

After being given a new name and body, Jax is welcomed into an incredible world of h̶o̶r̶r̶o̶r̶ wonder, where anything can happen! As he adjusts to his changed life, he starts searching for a̶n̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶t̶ new friends in this fantastic, colorful, digital circus!

The 1st Episode of the Haunted Mystery Series. Can you solve the puzzle before the book does? A haunted clock. A stolen hour. A family secret that should have stayed buried. When Wednesday Santora and her sister Frigsday awaken an impossible antique clock, they discover spirits trapped between its ticks and a mystery stretching through generations of their own family. To free the dead, Wednesday must solve the one question nobody has dared ask: Who really cursed the Haunted Clock? But some doors were locked for a reason. And Wednesday has always had a weakness for opening them. 🕰️🕷️

The Deveau triplets step into Azeroth's brewing storm........ Phoenix, armed with dangerous secrets and a growing messiah complex, knowingly drags her sisters to Theramore - one of Azeroth's coming tragedies - as Queen Azshara's arcane core grows stronger inside her and drains her with it........ Cassandra's steel sharpens with every crack in her trust of her sister, her unanswered letters to Flynn carving a deeper wound - leading her life to an irrevocable change........ Belinda, ever the quiet one, begins to awaken a power that could rival even Phoenix's........ And as spies circle from every shadow, Nyxxeldra's forces swell by the day. The war over Pandaria is coming. And so is the Hour of Midnight........ This is Volume Two of a five-volume story-one continuous narrative, divided for readability.

Humans... always trying to speedrun their downfall. They tore the world apart, then acted shocked when there was nothing left. The apocalypse came and went. No glory in it. Just ash, blood, and fools dying confused. Then they rebuilt it. Because they never learn. Now the world stands again, but, you know... it's real dodgy. Yeah. It's dark. Rotten from the inside. Evil... everywhere. Real dick for brains, motherfuckers running around doing heinous things. Real bottom-tier pieces of human shit. Not hidden either. It walks openly, smiling. But even rot knows fear, and there's a dude that scares the absolute fuck out of every last one of those sadistic bastards. Abram Karasu. If that psychopath decides you're on the menu, your fate was signed, sealed, and notarized before you even heard his footsteps. So don't embarrass yourself by begging. Seriously. It doesn't make him merciful... it just pisses him the fuck off. He doesn't give speeches. He gives brutal honesty. And every lesson comes delivered with all the warmth of a goddamn kunai straight to the face. The guilty know him for the way he kills. Slow when it needs to be slow. Painful when pain is deserved. Accurate. Unmoved. Brutal. He tears evil apart piece by piece, making sure nothing crawls back afterward. No loose ends. No second chances. When retribution moves through him, doors don't matter. Walls don't matter. Your just fucked. Still... he isn't devoid of emotion. God, no. Don't get that twisted. Under all that carnage and maniacal euphoria, there's a normal guy who's just trying to live his fucking life. He's a rare kind of person. Hard to find. The innocent see it. A hand offered. Protection given without a word. He's no hero. Heroes care about being seen. Karasu is just a guy with insane power that chose to use it to do remarkable shit. People say his methods are... Unorthodox. Yeah, that's the word...

In a world where everything is a power play, every life a pawn, and every movement observed, what will happen when two of them clash? Ritika Singhania, the Queen to whom his demons bow. She was never the person you'd go to for emotional support or advice. Because for her they didn't exist. Trauma? Choice? Betrayal? Deceit? Nobody knew what caused it. But what everyone did know was that she was the only person who'd kill you for one wrong breath. Veer Choudhary, the Devil who can kill and be killed for her. He was ruthless, feared, and calculated. But he prioritized his family and Kingdom over anything else. He stopped believing in love. WHY? No one asked that. Sparks fly, but not the warm ones, the ones which can set the world on fire. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Love is a battlefield. Literally. To the rest of the world, Alice is the flawless, smiling idol of her high school. To herself, she's a burnt-out teenager desperately wishing for the end of the world just so she can skip class. She gets her wish when the sky tears open, unleashing an alien horde upon the city. Enter the Magical Girls of War-unstoppable warriors wielding cosmic power. Yet, behind the frills, ribbons, and massive weapons lies a darker truth: their magic is fueled by the rawest, most volatile human defects. Chief among them is a terrifyingly hyper-protective pink warrior driven by a dangerous, unhinged obsession to keep Alice safe at all costs... even if Alice has absolutely no idea who they are. Amidst explosions, flying debris, and broken hearts, a war of toxic emotions has begun. I am also now publishing this story on royal road!!

(Contains spoilers for all chapters) [Version A] Kris, for the past 2 days, haven't had their autonomy for quite some time. Their soul had been making choices for them that they'd rather have not been made. However, after the Queen's battle, wake up in the overworld, confused and disorientated, but.... with free will, again? They would be happy, but it's cut short when they realize that what they hoped for came with a strange price. A price that they hope they can get rid of soon before things go awry.