Fantasyhumor Stories

Politics is a cutthroat game, but when you're dead, it doesn't matter what they cut. And it is a dirty game, filled with the kind of people that think nothing of ruining an opponent's life, but few go so far as throwing their counterparts through windows. When Balmy Bymeadow is improbably murdered, his son, Myld, is forced to carry on his father's legacy, but, in order to do so, he must take the unprecedented course of keeping his dead father around. Aided by Finella, a uniquely talented taxidermist, her sister, Flinda, a self-appointed Fairly Gods-Mother, and Phibber Monkshot, a wily and incredibly competent civil servant, in his corner, Myld must navigate the torrid waters of politics, deal with his surprisingly mobile dead father, avoid several near-death experiences and learn what it requires to get elected in a city where politics is quite literally a life or death struggle. With a pinch of 'Yes, Minister', a dash of 'The Walking Dead', and a heaped spoonful of 'Discworld'.

An epic road trip featuring such things as: murder, complex solutions to simple problems (ie: murder), committing crimes (including, but not limited to: murder), team building activities (murder), a thirty litre bottle of soda, and several epic fights for justice (resulting in murder). In this adventure I am joined by a retired detective obsessed with beavers, a mechanic with significant insight into the supernatural, a young gamer with paralysed hands, and my wife.

Part 1 - Embracing the Light Who would have thought Kat's life would be thrown into chaos because of a book? As an object, it was so unassuming. The cover certainly did nothing to advertise the events that would follow after she happily received it. Now all she could think of was how she wanted to destroy the blasted thing. But did she really? Because in the chaos she discovered something precious. Part 2 - Chasing the Dark Kai and Kat return to the place of their stories beginning when trouble brews in the six realms. They begin a journey of discovery, friendship, adventure, and scariest of all, love.

💧 REBORN AS A SLIME HERO Book One: From Blob to Legend He died in front of his PC. Now he's squishy, squelchy... and possibly the world's last hope. Jin didn't expect to wake up as a blob of goo in a monster-infested dungeon. No hands. No sword. Just "Absorb," "Squelch," and way too much sarcasm. He thought this would be a bad isekai. Instead, he: Accidentally impresses a demon lord Gets adopted by his dangerously stabby daughter Builds a slime-themed empire And discovers he might be a reincarnated piece of a forgotten god. Now the world wants him dead, worshipped... or both. And all Jin wants is to survive long enough to find snacks and avoid turning evil.

Kai Morita is minding his own business-specifically, a cup of instant noodles-when a blinding circle of magic yoinks him into a throne room full of expectations. The royal appraisal declares him talentless, the court hands him a pouch of pity gold, and the "chosen" heroes move on without him. Which is fine by Kai. He'd rather find a quiet bed, a cheap breakfast, and a rooftop with a sunset. It's a good plan-at least until life decides otherwise.

**Finalist of The Mages Guild Award for Creative Writing** ***** The King is dead. The country has descended into chaos. Sir Ambrose once had his choice of the greatest heroes to command. What he has been lumbered with are: a wizard with no control over his ability to make fire, a thief with broken hands, and the Duchess of Danefield who is clearly an orc in a dress. Thankfully, Sir Ambrose has a plan. He just can't remember what it was. Map by: https://www.reddit.com/u/chevellure/s/vwmCvHDndr

Zara was just trying to procrastinate. Instead, she summoned a demon boyfriend using ketchup and sarcasm. Now Asmodeus is burning her toast, flirting with her professors, and threatening to curse her entire town if she breaks his heart. Love wasn't part of the plan. But neither was eternal pigeon divorce. A rom-com one-shot with supernatural spice, snarky banter, and a demon who just wants to make breakfast.

After the extermination of the entire royal family by terrible monsters, only the newborn heir to the throne miraculously survives. But the evil fate still overtakes the already impoverished 14-year-old mute boy from the gloomy Middle Ages, mercilessly dumping him into the seething spring river. His almost lifeless body is now inhabited by a successful businessman and a martial arts champion who has long abandoned his career. Lethal fights, cruel rulers, treacherous enemies and loyal friends, as well as the newfound reckless youth and incredible abilities, are just the few things that await our contemporary in the body of a skinny, universally persecuted mute teenager from a very poor family, who is making ends meet... "Very interesting book! Read it in one sitting» I caught adrenaline, as if I climbed this arena! Thank you very much!" «The fights, moves and monologues of Koti are described beautifully. The text is easy to read, the actions of the heroes are vividly presented. Very interesting!" "Bravo! Undoubtedly, this is an amazing book! I have no other opinion! I can not give any other rating than the highest. Super author!"

He smirked at her, 'you never really were one to curse. Even now, you still refuse to do so.' as he said this, he creeped closer to Hermione, making her step backwards and into the wall. He was so close to her, she could feel his hot yet icy breath on her skin. 'I think we both know what I'm gonna do to you right now.' Hermione, with her gaping mouth and wide eyes, was unresponsive. 'Since you clearly don't know, I'll just tell you.' he brought the wand to her face, 'I don't want you telling anyone of what you saw or did last night with me.' *** The rules in Hogwarts changed during the beginning of the Golden trio's fifth year. Such as, there can only be one prefect per house. Either a girl or a boy can be voted per house. Ron and Hermione go head on toe to win that prefects badge, befriending each other. But what happens when Malfoy gets in the way of everything that Hermione worked so hard for to rebuild her friendships? Or will she just have to make new ones? BEWARE! You're about to read a bad ass story right here. Just know that I don't take hate. Mainly because I don't care. Bad words, bad content, and bad grammar are exclusive, so if you're not up for it... well bye This story takes place in the golden trios fifth year and migrates from one character POV to the next. But don't worry, it's amazing and you're gonna love it. P.S. Most of the characters belong to ma gurl J.K. Rowling... But I also make up some names as I write. Also, the plot is mine.

I woke up expecting my plain white ceiling. Instead, I got a medieval roof full of creepy runes, a missing pillow... and a dangerously attractive, one-eyed man with fangs calling me "author." Somehow, I've been dropped inside my own fantasy novel - the one where the hero is supposed to die to save the world. Except my so-called "Chosen One," Arion Vale, refuses. Now, with three days before the entire kingdom turns to stone, I have to convince my stubborn hero to complete the ritual... or I'll be trapped in my own story forever. Oh, and the villain I created? He's here too - and he knows exactly how much trouble I'm in. It's my plot. My world. My characters. ...So why does it feel like I'm the one about to lose?

Flash fiction contest hosted by @LayethTheSmackdown along with @flashfic and @Ooorah.

[Complete.] A fairy tale retelling of Grimm's Joringel and Jorinda crossed with the Golden Goose, the tale of a young man on a quest to rescue his lady is turned on its head when two sprites show up to "help."

Festivus time is here! By golly! After an avoidably unfortunate incident involving an unnecessarily large cat, with an odd way of choosing its prey, a lazy ogre, and a decision against getting knees cold, a set of brothers, long since thought gone from the world, set out to bring their itinerant feline home before things get really, really messy. Unfortunately, the Festive Boys can't stop themselves from following their Festivus instincts and the village of Drippings on the Lea have no understanding of what's coming. With a reluctant queen, an even more reluctant witch, who isn't really a witch at all, a permanently confused farmer with a rabid fear of thinking, and a reindeer called Civilolph, who has no idea why he's pulling a haywain, the villagers of Drippings on the Lea attempt to get in on a little Festivus miracle, even if they have to fight for it. Deck the halls, not your neighbours!

"Wilkynn Geodonna believed everything she heard. Every fragment of lie, every grain of truth, and every joking exaggeration. She was surrounded by truth, and nothing in between. No grey area. Not even black and white. Only white. Only perfection." Wilky's life is perfect until her wealthy family is kidnapped to be sold into slavery, and Wilky's fiancee, Destin is torn away from her. Out in an unforgiving world on her own, Wilky must find her way to the land of Lorea, which seems like a lonely and impossible journey until she meets the eccentric, go-lucky wizard, Casey Caster, the grumpy and mysterious (yet beautiful) Thea, and the wanted mercenary, Helewis Bronsky. This story will be updated on Tuesdays and Fridays with a new chapter! I also have a fantasy short story, called Death's Waterfall, and a collection of poems!

A heartwarming comedy about life, love, and a ghost with unfinished business. College was supposed to be Ethan Hale's fresh start, but between failing grades and the pressure to make his family proud, he's slowly falling apart. Then he meets Iryne-a carefree, mischievous girl who always knows exactly when he needs a break. The catch? She's a ghost. As Ethan grows closer to her, he starts to uncover the truth about her past. But some mysteries are harder to face than others, and finding the truth might just change everything.🤔

[ONC 2024 Longlister] The heir to the kingdom has been kidnapped! Many great and powerful adventurers have tried to find him and bring him back to the loving arms of his father. Unfortunately, though great and powerful, they are also very much pitiful failures. When Luthiriensis, an elven tourist, and Mott, a perpetually aggrieved dwarf, are recruited by a mysterious patron to find the child, they soon find themselves in far more trouble than they could ever have imagined. Also, their recruiter is a dragon. So there's that to deal with too. An ONC novella based upon Prompt 21 - A dragon, an elf, and a dwarf embark on a quest to find the lost heir to the kingdom. Formerly "A Tale of Three". Cover created in Canva, using an AI generated picture and text through Logokit.

Destiny- Lvl 32 Knight. the size of a toddler. not litertally but it seems like it. she's short. Lovable and nice, her favorite thing is kisses. she would kiss anyone. Except a hive of bees? Josh- Lvl 31 Healer. a good guy. He's really nice and really excitable, with a literal heart of gold. cut him open if you want man, it's fuckin there and it's FUCKIN WILD. Marley- Lvl 30 Summoner- Who is she. Honestly. A real meme, says "Bees?" A lot and thinks it's hilarious. optimistic even though her favorite thing to say is "When will death claim me." A trio of adventurers on a quest to get to the wishing star, a place where they can make one wish. one chance to make their dreams come true. Of course, it's never gonna happen because their daily lives consist of; Almost dying, getting eaten by various monsters (mostly Dess), fighting 200 bees, Eating an entire jar of mayo for 20 gold, Falling off of cliffs on purpose, and constantly asking stupid questions ("Bees?" LMAO).

In a world where mythical creatures go to high school, Luna Tanggol, a 17-year-old girl from a long line of manananggals, is trying to survive two things: being half-monster and passing senior year. She's never actually hunted anyone (she's vegan-kind of), hates flying because of motion sickness, and is terrified of blood. Worse, she's supposed to learn the "ancient art of torso-separation" before her 18th birthday or lose her family's powers forever. With a talking pet tiktik, a TikTok-famous kapre, and a best friend who's a half-duwende barista, Luna's about to find out that being supernatural doesn't make high school any easier-especially when a mysterious boy who hunts aswang enrolls as the new transfer student.