Sarcasm Stories

A gremlin in a cafe... do I have to say more? A/N: I do NOT permit any kind uf usage of my story for podcasts, youtube or any other kind...as well as Translations. This is a my hero accademia fanstory hope you enjoy! Please also feel free to correct my bad writing. Rights on the pictures go to the artist. I do not own my hero accademia , rights to the owner.

Thalia Kennedy is a positive ball of sunshine, she likes dirty jokes and smiling whenever. When she meets a man, the complete opposite of her she immediately takes a liking to him and wants to be the one to teach him how to enjoy the little things is life. Heath Jackson was a complicated man in many ways, from his complicated past to his guaranteed complicated future, he was never able to run away from his silent fears he'd face alone. He was closed off and hated the thought of even interacting with people, until someone was heavenly brought in to save him. --------------------------- "I'm thinking" He tells me and I frown. Is it really that hard to think about something nice about me? "I like your lips" He finally answers with a sly smirk on his face thinking he did something. "Which ones?" I ask before I could stop myself and bite my lip. "Don't you dare answer that" I point my finger at him, the smirk still on his face. ----------------------- #3 in cold 7/11/22 #1 in sarcasm 8/10/22

Jessica Stanley had a plan. That plan involved finishing her junior year in Austin, finding a college with a reputable journalism program, and maintaining a tan that didn't look like it came out of a bottle. What the plan did not involve was her father's cliché mid-life crisis, her mother's subsequent transformation into a Zillow-obsessed man-hater, and a one-way ticket to the rainiest armpit of the Pacific Northwest. Now, instead of South Congress and breakfast tacos, Jessica is facing a town that looks like the "Before" picture in a Prozac commercial. Her mother is on a crusade to eliminate the "male gaze" from their lives, her wardrobe is woefully unprepared for 365 days of drizzle, and the local high school population appears to be composed entirely of people who think flannel is a personality trait. But Forks has secrets that even a cynical Texan can't explain away. Between the weirdly pale, suspiciously attractive siblings who treat the cafeteria like a runway and the brooding local boys who seem to have a personal vendetta against shirts, Jessica finds herself at the center of a narrative she never signed up for. Armed with a razor-sharp wit, a dwindling supply of dry shampoo, and a complete lack of patience for small-town nonsense, Jessica is determined to survive senior year. But in a town where the sun never truly rises, she's about to find out that some shadows are a lot more dangerous than a cheating ex-husband. Or: The one where Jessica Stanley is the Main Character, the Cullens are weird, and she's going to write a very scathing exposé about all of it.

"Wait, let me get this straight," she says, her voice rising. "You want me to get fat?" Alexander's face remains impassive. "Pregnant. So, yeah." Cara stares at him, searching for signs of a head injury or a hidden camera crew. Finding neither, she decides this must be his twisted form of revenge. "You're going crazy," she announces, grabbing her bag. "I'm leaving." She's halfway to the door when his words stop her cold. "Half a million dollars," Alexander says calmly. "Use it for your mom's treatment. The rest? I don't care what you do with it." Cara stops to she process his words. ~~~ What happens when the billionaire meets one of the craziest girl on the planet? Well, for sure there's gonna be; Publicity stunts, hilarious arguments, forced proximity, Fake relationships, and many more. But is there gonna be love? There's only one way to find out..... I assure you 100% humor,100% romance,100% crazy. WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS MATURE THEMES AND GRAPHIC LANGUAGES, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! Cover by: @quirksofchole

I am by far no one should actually dare to harm.... 3 simple reasons... 1) My mom 2) My mom 3) My mom HAHAHA did you expect something else? All the heroes are scared of my mom but they should be scared of her son more than her.... for she has trained me. I am just as unstoppable and insane as she is. Fight me... and you lose. A/N: I do NOT permit any kind uf usage of my story for podcasts, youtube or any other kind...as well as Translations. This is a my hero accademia fanstory hope you enjoy! Please also feel free to correct my bad writing. Rights on the pictures go to the artist. I do not own my hero accademia , rights to the owner.

Haven = a poetic note to finding safety and love amid chaos Valentina Romano was the first girl born in the Romano family since decades. Everybody was over the moon when they heard about the little girl, that was the light in their dark world. Valentina lived carefree with her family until one day when she was four everything changed. Kidnapped by a someone she doesn't remember and left at an orphanage, she was now alone and left to take care for herself. Still remembering her family, she tried to stay positiv every day and keep hoping that they will find her. Unluckily she gets adopted by some couple, that later turn out as drug addicts and only adopted her for the extra money they get, not caring about the girl, Valentina was yet left alone to take for herself. Meanwhile the Romanos lost their light. The once so happy family lost all their happiness with the disappearance of their little girl. They are determined to find Valentina and bring her back home. What sounded easy at the beginning, turned into 12 years of not knowing the whereabouts of their bambina. Will Valentina ever get the chance to go back to her family? And will the Romano's finally get their light back? What happens when she finds out about the mafia?

An LGBT novel. THE ROAR OF THE CHEERING CROWD. Val Wash is one her school's best soccer players. She's charming, smooth talking and can get out of trouble with ease. At least that's how it was in the past, but now her heart's affection refuses to release its target, her straight best friend. THE ENCHANTING SUMMON OF THE DESIRED. Naomi Johnson has always loved men. Lately, certain passions have risen that muddle her love for her boyfriend and lead her down a path she has never tread. IT'S THEIR FINAL YEAR AND THEIR FRIENDSHIP GROWS UNSTABLE. What will happen when the girls appeal to their innermost wishes? Can their friendship last through the chaos that accompanies their senior year? Copyright © edanmorez, all rights reserved. Do not reproduce. (If you are reading this story on any other platform other than Wattpad you are very likely to be at risk of a malware attack. If you wish to read this story in it's original, safe, form, please go to (https://www.wattpad.com/user/edanmorez))

❝ your heart and my heart are very, very old friends.❞ ~ Hafiz - ✨A collection of short stories waiting to be read✨ Grab onto your popcorn buckets and strap in for the ride! -

Veronica Scott thought she had it all - a career on the edge, a husband who was her calm. Until she discovered the truth. The man she loved was living a lie. Now, with secrets unravelled and trust shattered, Daniel's gotta fight to prove he's more than his shadows. Can he earn back the trust of the one person he never meant to hurt?

̗̀➛ "aw man, boys that spontaneously combust really aren't my type..." anaya zheng didn't want to be a demigod. in her ideal world, she's invisible. a typical face in the millions. but after getting her head bashed in by crazed wind spirits trying to murder her on the grand canyon, her ideal world becomes a myth. and myths become her reality. tossed into a quest with her three "sort of friends", adjusting to being the daughter of a god definitely isn't easy. it isn't all bad. she's got leo valdez. he's the only one that really makes sense to her, mostly after a few near death experiences with him. maybe, she thinks, this demigod thing isn't so grim after all. the odds are impossible. the path is unforgiving. and failure isn't an option, unless anaya wants to eat dirt for the rest of her life. (stupid dirt lady...) eight half-bloods must answer the call. -not all canon (relating to plot) -currently in-editing/worked on constantly! the original chapters are slowly being rewritten. -essentially a heroes of olympus rewrite. different ending -slow burn -fem!oc x canon -major character deaths The Lost Hero ✅ The Mark of Athena ✅ The House of Hades ✅ The Blood of Olympus ✅ RATINGS: #1 PJO - 03/03/26 #1 Frank Zhang 03/09/26 #1 Rick Riordan 03/10/26 #1 Heroes of Olympus 04/06/26 #1 Fire 04/09/26 #1 Leo Valdez 04/26/26 #1 Jason Grace 05/01/26

A team of experts going through life with missions marked as "impossible," still surviving them like cockroaches. Where is one cockroach there are usually more nearby, and impossible to get rid off. Multi crossover fanfiction story with a lot of sarcasm and chosen family love.

"If you want to make the world a better place take a look at yourself and make a change." "Um, I'm pretty sure that's Michael Jackson." ---- The problem with stealing priceless artifacts was that everyone expected thieves to be graceful. They weren't. Not these ones anyway. Which is funny because considering what they're pulling off at the moment, everyone watching the news that next morning would think they were.

One house. Two roommates. Except one of them is a street-hardened Indie cat who doesn't pay rent and thinks he's the landlord.

Under a rain-heavy London sky, two strangers collide-not by chance, but by consequence. He is-a global icon and the reluctant heir to a legacy that taught him everything about success and nothing about staying. She is-a quietly ambitious designer who believes in effort, timing, and never asking twice to be chosen. Their first meeting? Reckless, miscalculated, and ends with both of them running from a mistake neither fully owns. No names exchanged. No promises made. Elegant, witty, and emotionally charged, this enemies-to-lovers romance unfolds through razor-sharp banter, quiet longing, and the undeniable pull of something that keeps returning- no matter how far they run.

Finding You Series - Book 2 "Oh, so you're Scott's girl," he says with dark humor. Hunter doesn't respond, but his grip on my hand tightens as the boy lets out a short laugh. "Well, this just got a hell of a lot more fun," he continues, looking at Hunter, who's anger is now hanging by just a thread. He looks me up and down one more time, before walking away, leaving me feeling violated and incredibly confused. Who the hell was that? And how does he know Hunter?" *** It's senior year, and Hunter and Mia are back to school, back together, and stronger now than ever before. But staying that way becomes increasingly difficult when they both have to make important decisions about their future which threatens to put a strain on their relationship. On top of all that, Hunter's former high school merges with Northwest Academy, causing old mistakes and old enemies to resurface, and it soon becomes apparent that Mia might not know as much about him as she thinks. What happens when Hunter's past comes back to haunt him? And by association, Mia? Can the boy who once saved her from her world, protect her from his? Even he's not sure, but he's sure as hell going to try.

⊱ 𝓝𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓲𝓷 𝓪 𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝔂𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓼 ⊰ Olivia Carver, the hopeless romantic, who denies it and tries to hide away the cracking shadows of her past trauma with smiles and laughter. Aiden Parker, who has his own load of shit in his past to deal with too, but he copes a different way- the more violent way by getting in trouble almost every single day. They despise each other. After 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 day, Olivia and Aiden both already try to avoid each other as much as possible in school. But how much can that help when Aiden is forced to give her basketball lessons they need to do for their grade and she cannot refuse because she completely sucks in sports? What will happen when the line of 'just a month of tolerating each other' blur and they can actually stand each other? Maybe even more than that. 𝓢𝓽𝓪𝓻𝓽𝓮𝓭: ᴀᴘʀɪʟ 2025

A princess by day. A hero by night. A villain who refuses to stop talking during fights. And a relationship neither of them can name... but both keep coming back to. But then one day the villian's task is to assasinate the princess.

Alix Moreau crossed an ocean at seventeen to train under the most demanding coach in figure skating. After three years of practice, small successes and a career-threatening injury, she's back on the rink with one goal: qualify for the Olympics. Roman Rozhenov knows some victories cost more than they're worth. A former world-class skater who gave everything to the sport, he's spent the last decade turning talent into champions and hoping Alix Moreau never has to sacrifice the parts of herself he loves most. Roman can pinpoint the exact moment every athlete under his care landed their first triple Axel, the angle of their blade, even the look on their face when they realised they were capable of more. He can't pinpoint when Alix became the rare thing he stopped trying to explain and simply hoped never to lose. ~ I finish tightening the laces on my skates and push to my feet. "You're limping again," Roman says the way other people might point out it's raining. "That's a very serious accusation." He reaches into his pocket and drops two painkillers into my palm before handing me his water bottle. I stare at them. Roman can't take painkillers; he's allergic. Which means he's been carrying them around for me. Again. "Why do you always do this?" His gaze finds mine. I've seen those eyes reduce national champions to tears. I've never once been afraid of them. "Because after three years, zanoza," he says, "the things that hurt you tend to get my attention." ~

Amira Sharpe is a girl with fingers practically stained with ink and a heart too big for the superficial world around her. She survives the crowded hallways of Westbridge High by burying herself in library stacks, her bag overflowing with good rom-coms and messy notebooks. A hopeless romantic in the purest, most dangerous sense of the phrase, Amira believes love should mean something. She believes in yearning glances, accidental hand touches, the kind of confessions that leave your chest aching for days afterward. To her, romance is an art form- and most people are doing it wrong. Especially boys like Kieran Seth. See, Kieran is the absolute antithesis of a fairytale hero or the male lead in a beautiful romance. He doesn't do grand gestures, he doesn't have a brooding, poetic soul, and he certainly doesn't fit into any of her favorite fictional tropes. Quite the contrary, he makes fun of that 'mushy-feely stuff'. He doesn't believe in love, let alone see the point of it. And worst of all, he acts like people who do believe in love are simply naïve- like Amira herself. Now, that is practically an insult to anyone with a heart. In other words: he is the absolute opposite of everything Amira has ever wanted. Which is exactly why he should have been irrelevant to her story. But what happens when senior year comes along and Amira's counting down the days until she gets out of Westbridge High forever, only to be met with the biggest project of the year, and the only person in the world she'd stab twice in the chest tied to her for it?