He awoke with a gasp, bolting upright, arms flailing. Vision swimming, the man dressed in black was completely disoriented. Panting, he whipped his head to the left, then right.
Where was he? Seconds ago he had been fighting a Praetorian guard as the red screen lining the walls had caught fire, filling the room with ash and embers.
Now he appeared to be in a forest. A thick canopy hung over head, completely obscuring any moonlight there might have been. His back itched, needles from some sort of flowering plant sticking to his shirt from where he had been laying.
Was this some kind of Force-induced vision? It was really an inopportune moment if it was. And the girl--where was the girl? She had just been sliced on her upper arm a moment ago--
It finally dawned on Kylo he had been dreaming. That fight had happened nearly a month ago now. So much had happened since then. Fighting back annoyance, he clenched his right hand into a fist.
He hated dreaming. He couldn't remember the last time he had a happy dream. He would even settle for neutral dreams. But they always came to him as nightmares. Wiping sweat off his brow, he looked at the ground next to him and immediately felt relieved.
Rey was curled up next to him, sound asleep. In her sleep she had inched closer and closer, and he was embarrassed to find her dreaming away right up against him. Edging away carefully, he was happy to find his night terror hadn't woken her.
Her name is Rey, Kylo chided himself.
It was going to be hard for him to not think of her as 'the girl'. A small smile played on his lips. It would be even harder to not think of himself as Kylo Ren--she insisted on calling him Ben.
What are you doing? asked the voice of self-doubt that had plagued him for as long as he could remember.
What was he doing? He had run away from The First Order and immediately to Rey. She hadn't trusted him at first; of course she hadn't. He wouldn't have trusted himself. It wasn't until he let down his mental walls, allowing his true thoughts and emotions wash over her in waves through the Force, did she trust him.
She had started crying and had hugged him. Her response confounded him. Shouldn't she be happy? He had stiffened at her embrace, completely unused to such things. The happiness washing over his senses from her and the hug confused him. People confused him. This was all new and weird. Kylo had wanted to run away. Instead she had held him tighter, as though she knew his compulsion to flee.
And now, as he watched her sleep, he smiled. He knew he had made the right choice. Kylo had found in her a confidante he never had with Snoke. He had found someone who was equally matched in the Force.
He had found peace.
The smile quickly deteriorated.
Careful, Kylo, he thought to himself. Don't be complacent.
It was true. Even now, as they were returning to the remaining fragments of The Resistance, Kylo knew they were in danger. He had shut himself off completely from the Force, too afraid it might become like a beacon the First Order might use to track him. He couldn't go back; they would kill him on sight for his betrayal.
And what would Hux say?
The thought was so sudden Kylo couldn't stop it before he made it. Agitation hit him, and he clenched his fist again.
Who gives a damn what Hux would say? he thought to himself.
Yet even through that last thought, he felt...something. He couldn't pinpoint it. A sort of tightness in his chest. Fear? Anger? Apprehension? The more he explored it the more it confused him. It felt almost like...
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Into the Fray
FanfictionKylo Ren, for a reason unknown to even himself, decides to move to the light. The task proves to be difficult--reuniting with his mother, seeking a seemingly impossible redemption--especially when unwanted and unexpected feelings arise... ~~PLEASE N...