Watch The Sparks Fly

It's Not Stealing If It's Yours

NOTES: Canonical timeline | Year 0, late autumn | third person

incomplete

———

"I'm half sure this is illegal."

Wiz laughs breezily, his hat lopsided in the evening wind. Breaking into houses was never his specialty, but you do what you need to do. And Wiz needs to survive.

"Acacia, dear, there is no set concept of right and wrong. Everything's in that weird shade of grey morality!" he says, flinging his back leg over one side of the fence and carefully avoiding the barbed wire. "It might seem bad for the owner of this mansion, but it sure will be good for me!"

"You're just saying that to get me to help you."

Oof, ouch, he can feel her unimpressed stare from all the way up here. "Of course I am," he says, and after a moment, adds, "is it working?"

"Try harder."

He gives her his best smile and promptly topples over the fence. There is a dull thud, quickly followed by a groan. Wiz wonders if he can provoke enough sympathy in the minimal amount of noise.

Turns out he can.

Acacia sighs and scales the wall soon after him. She will question her life decisions later, when this Sparkless problem on legs gets what he wants. She drops to the ground on the other side and fixes her gaze on Wiz, who managed to tangle himself in a hedge thorn.

Wiz manages to reach a new level of annoying. "Why, hello there, Council-member! Haven't expected to see you here," Wiz beams and then shifts so she could untangle him.

"Don't antagonize me," Acacia says, and claws through the thorns a little too close to Wiz's pelt. He rewards her with a half-offended, half-amused look. She changes the topic before he can open his mouth and whine some more. "Why are you doing this, anyway?"

"You mean, why are we doing this," Wiz says slyly and dodges a flick. "No, no, don't deny it, now you're part of it, too."

"Keep talking and soon I won't be."

He stands up, free out of the hedge's clutches. Wiz adjusts his hat. "I'd say it's because the homeowner has something that I don't... Heads down."

They both duck in time to avoid the spotlight. Acacia raises wary eyes to check their surroundings.

"All clear."

The duo crawls through the undergrowth to a basement window. It's surprisingly pristine, and as they drop inside, Wiz notices there is no dust around.

Acacia frowns. "It's too clean," she announces and pulls Wiz out of the basement before he could lick anything.

They stumble into a narrow hallway and promptly scare the soul out of an elderly maid, who faints with a dull thud. Wiz curses under his breath. They have no time for this. At least, not now.

"So much for being undercover," Acacia says.

He throws her a dirty look, mixed with fond exasperation. "Doesn't matter — they'll figure it's me anyway. We're not exactly," Wiz gestures at their lack of any protective gear, "being all secretive. The plan is to get in and get out before anyone catches us. We're going to get a hell lot louder soon."

"Why didn't you at least get gloves?"

"Because I don't have the budget for these, dear."

"Oh, is that why we're here? You 'don't have the budget' for something so you steal it instead?" Her voice contained enough edge to let Wiz know she is this close from giving him out.

"No, no, no," he says hurriedly, as they exit the hallway and duck into a side staircase, "you see, it doesn't count as stealing when it's originally yours."

"Oh my god."