I rested my head back onto the ratty old chair and closed my eyes. The needle was sticking out of my now limp hand, and the white powder was sitting on the glass table. This was the only way i could forget about my pain. The one and only way. I've tried going to rehab, I honestly have, but none was good to me. It was as if every time I was able to resist the urge it would be able to find me and completely take over my whole body.
To be honest, I was never like this. I used to be a kind, holy church kinda girl but after all we have to change to something else sooner or later. Even though my eyesight was a little fuzzy I was still able to make out the abandoned warehouse that I had called home, and it's messy qualities. Ever since I had decided to run away from home I had learnt to take care of myself, and by that I meant avoid the cops or any social workers.
A hand slammed down onto the table and shook me out of my daze. "Where's the money?" A gruff voice asked. I lazily rolled my head to the left and was greeted by a bearded face with a musky scent. This must've been the new dealer Cal told me about before he decided to retire and propose to his pregnant girlfriend, Becky.
I tried to get up, but my body was so numb I couldn't feel anything. But I didn't mind. The voice got more impatient, "Well, where is it? I have others to sell to y'know?" God. Would he never shut up?! I reached into the dirty blazer pocket and pulled out my wallet. "How much is it?" My voice had come out hoarse and lazy.
"50" What?! "How? All I asked for was coke and heroine." I frowned strongly, then handed him the needed money. Before leaving, he counted up the money and picked up his satchel. That was it. I didn't ask him to have coffee with me or watch a movie, because all he was there for was for money and to provide me with type A drugs.
Now that my body was regaining its normal posture, I stood up and decided to have a hot bath. Maybe for one hour.
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After securely wrapping the cotton onto my body I made my way to the small wardrobe and bought out a oversized band shirt, black leggings and worn out Ugg boots and got dressed.
Grabbing the packet of smokes off the counter I took out an unlit one, put it in my lips then put my brown hair into a high ponytail. I was ready to go. When I opened the wooden door I was hit in the face with fresh air and Sun. I hated it. Stepping outside, I lit the smoke to keep me warm then made my way to the garden.
The garden was the only place I felt at peace with, the one place that wouldn't argue with me or make me feel worthless. Pushing open the massive black gates, the colourful sight of lilies, roses, lavender and all sorts were arranged in either colourful batches or rows. I took a long drag from the cigarette then breathed out softly, suffocating the air around me. The cigarette didn't help so I took it out of my lips, threw it on the floor and stamped on it.
I needed something else but not right now.
Taking in the marvelous sight, I took a seat on a rainbow patterned bench. I remember having a garden like this back home, one that I would always run to after school ended and play about in. But that was before. This is now.
Suddenly an excited laugh came from the group of teens three benches away. "Oh my gosh! Stop it Brandon, that tickles!" I looked over there and saw a redhead sitting on a blond guy's (her boyfriend maybe?) lap. Rolling my eyes I stood up and walked out of the garden, ready for my next high.
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I held the black bag in my hand and opened the warehouse door with my free one. When I got in I retrieved the beer and smokes from the black bag, put them onto the glass table then removed my boots and leggings.As I walked over to the CD player I took my hair out of the ponytail and inserted an old DVD into the player, allowing the rock music to enter my head.
I sat crossed leg in front of the table allowing the small orange container of pills, coke, beer and smoke to be in my view. Firstly, I took a smoke lit it and took one drag from it then put it onto the table. Next, I popped opened the container lid and inserted three white pills into my mouth and to wash it down I drank the beer after.
Nearly there.
Now the coke. Putting my hair to the side, I bent down onto the white paper and snorted the drug in twice. Ahh. I stood up straight and smiled lazily whilst bobbing my head to the now distorted music that was playing through me. Everywhere seemed to be getting blurry now and bending about.
The music was the last thing I heard, before my eyes leisurely drifted close.
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Hey guys! Sooo... Was this good good or good bad?? Comment whatever you guys wanna, heck I don't even mind if you correct me as long as it's subtle and not too harsh. Vote pleasse!
Xxx
