𝙍𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡 ⇨ 𝙅𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙅𝙖𝙚𝙝𝙮𝙪𝙣 𝙁𝙁

𝐒𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍 : 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐲

√𝐉𝐀𝐄𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍:

The sky is cloudy and dark. It's a perfectly good day to be inside. However, I find myself stalling. Home is the last place I want to go right now. Especially knowing that Yeonhwa should be there soon.

I've been rejected before, but never in the way Yeonhwa did to me.

I feel a light tap on my shoulder and I turn around to see one of my best friends, Mark.

He looked hesitant to ask and gave me an awkward smile. "So...", he drawled out. "She said no?"

My expression lightened up a bit, but internally this was baffling me. "Well I didn't expect her to say yes, but I also didn't expect her to say what she did."

Mark leans in with curiosity and I instantly step back a bit. "And she said what exactly?"

My eyes roll and I think of her immediately after doing so. Her eye rolls. It pains me but I try to ignore it. "Well she said she didn't like me back. I expected things to end there but then she said we have tutoring today. I would've expected her to not want to see me at all. That's so unlike her."

Another hesitant look from Mark, but this time he doesn't wait to ask, "do you think she thinks it's weird because she's your tutor?"

"We're literally partners. Before she was my tutor, she was my classmate. It's not like she's being paid to tutor me. If she was, I'm sure she'd have to be more professional about it and so would I. Other than that she's just my classmate who happens to teach me too."

Mark puts his arm over my shoulder, shaking me a little before saying,  "then what do you think it is?"

My body doesn't move. I just stand there as I let my mind wander off into thought. I gather up something to say while my brain continues to be puzzled on this matter.  "I don't know but she did tell me that I seemed unsure. I mean, I couldn't answer some stuff she asked and I don't know why. I think I like her a lot though."

I'm brought closer to Mark with a sudden swing over the shoulder.  "Well what do you like about her then?"

Now this, I could answer without having to think. I let Mark know that's it's, "her sassy remarks. The way she teaches. She's really good at that. She somehow always makes things comfortable. Her attitude is everywhere but she's put together at the same time. And she's really pretty too."

"Jaehyun, don't you think that maybe you like her more for her company than you do in a romantic way?"

There was a pause. I had to think about that and I wouldn't be able to answer now. Mark continues to say, "sounds like you enjoy her as a friend. Just because certain aspects of her make you gravitate towards her doesn't instantly mean you have feelings for her. Just saying."

With that, Mark pats me on the back as he starts walking away. Which then makes me walk right behind him as I decide to head home. My mind becomes more confused than ever.

By the time my house comes into sight, it had started raining. There on the porch stands a lightly soaked and trembling Yeonhwa. My heart pounds at the sight of her. My body moved without giving me proper time to think about it. I'm running towards her and I don't even give her time to speak. My hand grabs the keys out of my pocket and I open the door. I open the door wide and let her walk in first.

Once my eyes have Yeonhwa in sight, I feel a sense of anger. A feeling I instantly shake off as I'm not comfortable scolding Yeonhwa. It's not my place anyways. As I walk in, I tell her, "you should use the spare key next time. I wouldn't mind if you did use it, you know."

She shrugs, not really caring and says, "well the porch offered me protection and I also didn't just want to walk in like that."

"Well it didn't protect you from the cold," I say rolling my eyes, realizing that I may be catching her habits.

"Look at you Jaehyun. I know I'm a little wet but you're drenched," she says looking at me up and down.

It takes me a minute but I look down at my clothes and she's right. I'm dripping wet. I guess I was too busy with my thoughts to notice just how wet I was getting.

"Go shower, you'll catch a cold," she says sternly.

"You should shower too, Yeonhwa."

She gives me a dead-ass look whilst saying,  "I will when I get home."

"That's unacceptable," I say.

She does her world famous eye roll and shrugs it off by saying, "well accept it."

"You'll get sick."

"Who cares," she tells me as she really makes it clear she's unbothered by her wet clothes.

"Well obviously me."

Yeonhwa looks ay me dead in the yes and gives me a really sarcastic looking smile. "Thank you for looking after me but I'm fine. It's just the outer layer of my clothes. I'll just take it off and I should be fine. You however should shower. I'll wait for you here and we can start our lesson right after."

"Fine."

I head to go shower and I leave her alone as I notice she starts to take her jacket off. Being in the shower, I tried everything to distract myself. Being alone with my thoughts clearly hasn't helped me today.

No matter what I try to shift my mind to, or whatever song I try to sing, there's always Mark's words haunting me regardless.

As I head back to the living room, I see Yeonhwa sitting in the couch.

There was something about how the slight dampness of her hair made it frizzy now that it had dried or maybe how adorable she looks with her baby hairs standing up that just amazed me.

She takes notice of me and motions me to walk closer.

I sit next to her and she starts pointing to a calendar she had laid out on the coffee table. "Okay so while you were gone, I calculated how much more material we need to cover and converted that into how many tutoring sessions should be left. So we'll be done in about a month and a half. Does that sound good?"

I smile at her. I wasn't paying attention but all I heard was her question. "Yeah, sounds good."

As the tutoring session went on, I tried to act normal but I couldn't say my regular remarks of usual. I just stared when she wasn't paying attention and I did my work when she was. I only talked when I had to and when I didn't, I was quiet. I guess this normal was too abnormal and strange for me.

When she left, my heart sank.

What if I don't like her? What if it's just the way she is that pulls me towards her? What if I only like her energy and presence?

I stand in the kitchen with hunger and I think about making myself a sandwich. The kind I made for her.

As I take a bite into my sandwich, I feel sadness. It doesn't taste the same.

I couldn't understand because I did everything right.

The last bite of the sandwich went into my mouth and realization hit me.

The only thing that was missing here was Yeonhwa.

I can't understand my feelings well yet nor do I know what it is that I actually feel.

But it's clear.

One thing I do understand is that I certainly did enjoy her company, and it was hitting me hard right now.

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