Drowning in an Endless Sky

Drowning

"How many people can honestly say that they've been in love?"

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Namjoon! We are not doing this today!" Jimin shouted, exasperated.

Namjoon was drunk.

That much was obvious to his two friends on this wonderful Friday night. As the clock wound down, so too, did the number of shot glasses empty. They sat around the restaurant table, chicken wings and beer glasses aplenty. Namjoon reached for a fry, holding it between his fingers like it was a cigarette.

"No... no! Hear me out." He squinted his eyes at Jimin and Taehyung sitting opposite him. In his haze, he could see Jimin giving him a glare of disapproval. With an easy smile, Taehyung swung his arm around Jimin's shoulder, as if telling him to let Namjoon continue.

"A lot of people say 'I love you', but how many of them actually mean it? You take those people out of the equation of the people who have been in love, and then you're left with the people who think that they mean it, but actually don't." He nibbled on a fry, taking another one and gesturing broadly. "Then you're left with the people that say it, mean it, but then start doubting themselves. What are you left with then? Everyone doubts themselves—'s only natural." He blinked twice, trying his hardest to steel his gaze. "How many of them can completely, honestly say that they've been in love?"

Taehyung started laughing, his hand slamming down against the table, causing a few glasses of beer to be knocked out of position but, thankfully, not spilled. "Namjoon! Did you know that you are hilarious when drunk!"

But Taehyung was drunk too, arguably even more so. His head tilting and spinning, he found himself languishing on Jimin's lap, already starting to nod off. Jimin, the only sober one at the table, slapped him lightly on the back of his neck as if telling him to snap out of it.

"I think that's enough for you two. We're going home."

Not in their right minds to object, Jimin paid the bill in full and led them by their drunk asses to his car.

Namjoon clambered into the backseat, his usual position whenever he went out with this small friend group. Taehyung and Jimin were roommates, so it was only natural that the one with the separate apartment should have a seat reserved in the back.

He stared at Jimin, who had taken position in the front seat, the engine revving as he plunged his keys into the car. He was always so reliable, that one, always taking care of everyone else around him.

The car rolled through the streets, red, yellow, and green all blurring together in Namjoon's vision. Acutely, he could feel each dip in the road, could feel the cold glass of the window bumping against his temple, but his eyes were focused on the driver.

Jimin was beautiful—always had been—but Namjoon found this thought grip his heart tighter than it had in a while.

Jimin was beautiful.

The first time he truly believed this fact was when he was in the college classroom, packing up his bags full of notebooks and assigned reading material. The professor had let the students out a little early this time, so that he could go pick up his daughters from the local high school. Namjoon was the only one still hanging around, left to wander the empty halls, but he'd decided that he'd much rather sit in silence and take in the grand size of the lecture hall he was privy to. He was just about ready to leave when a boy with bright pink hair rushed up to him, clutching that week's edition of the university newspaper.

"Are you Kim Namjoon?!" The boy said, with stars in his eyes.

He was cute, too cute for Namjoon to even fathom. Dressed in a graphic t-shirt two sizes too large and wearing a backpack that completely covered the back portion of his torso, the boy introduced himself as Park Jimin, the underclassmen from next door who had obsessively read every single one of Namjoon's published short stories in the final section of the newspaper. He was Namjoon's self-proclaimed "biggest fan".