Back To Me || Iwaoi Oneshot

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3 years.

In those three years, I shed tears.

I missed him.

Yes, we talked almost every day but thousands of miles separated us.

What we could've been.

It was 3 years ago that we started dating again,

We picked things back up where we left them from.

I already knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this man.

Iwaizumi Hajime.

In those 3 years, many things changed.

You could see how it took an effect on both of us, all I wanted was for him to come back home to me.

New year after new year I would spend it alone, wishing I was in the comfort of my lover's arms.

I knew he would come back.

I hoped he would come back.

I just wish I knew when.

I wish I knew when I would get to hold him again when I could get to do the things that tons of miles and a stupid computer screen were separating us from doing.

I was happy that he was still here, I just wanted more.

Some people may call it selfish,

But what's selfish about being with the one you wanted to be with the most?

Love isn't selfish, love is what we had.

Love is when I woke up every day in his arms.

Love is when, even though we got into several, sometimes petty fights, it never caused my mind to love him any less.

Love is how much trust I put into him, some people may call it sketchy or even have doubts when their partner has to be gone for along time.

But I love him enough to come back to me.

In those 3 years, I wanted him to come back to me.

Continous nights spending my time on facetime, wishing I could see his smile up close.

But I knew if this is what it had to be, then let it be.

Every single night I would wear on a smile, but every single night I was drowning in sorrow.

Was he gonna be there to save me?

Like all those times he did before?

Was he gonna be there when I went back into my slumping state of depression?

Was he gonna be there, when I had nightmares?

When I went through panic attacks?

When I would overthink?

Would he be there when I drowned myself deeper and deeper and deeper in fear that he would leave me?

Was he gonna be there when these thoughts continuously drowned into my mind?

Monophobia
The fear of being alone.

But was I really alone?

Or was it just my thoughts.

But when these things came into my mind I would always remind myself,

He loves me.

He loves me even when I could be annoying.