dance performance - an abby grange fan fiction [ clare siobhan ]

trust | 08

cw: mentions of abuse, homophobia & fat shaming.

「 indigo's pov 」

i sort of hesitated to follow abby to the dining area. i suppose i felt a bit - rejected. perhaps because she didn't trust me enough to share her pain.

grange had a rough childhood and home life. she was adopted at the age of 4, and her caretakers/parents weren't what you would call suited guardians for her.

i was there when she was going through it. the undetected hatred.. homophobia and no acceptance. in fact we met around that time.

it's an understatement to describe myself as unhelpful when i found out about her situation for the first time.

i felt useless. i had no experience, let alone advice to give her for it.

all i wanted was to help her, but i didn't even know when to start.

sometimes i compromised that maybe if i weren't so selfish about opening about my own problems, maybe she wouldn't think so low of me and choose to be quiet.

faith explained to me that i shouldn't blame myself for whatever im going through but i..

'indie? yo? are you okay?' violet nudged me with her fork, causing me to snap out of my thoughts.

everyone was looking at me with some worried expressions except abby, who was rather focusing on her food.

i suppose my thoughts went deep into my 'soul' or whatever — not like it exists — and showed my true feelings.

swatting away vio's utensil, i respond;
'im.. fine. i just overthought some things i suppose.'

'i've seen you upset a lot recently, are you doing alright, bubs?' my older sister questioned.

come to think of it.

im not aware of what my mental state is. i have been miserable on a recent note, like faith mentioned but usually for no reason.

my eating habits are getting.. worse. i find myself leaving behind partially full meals with no will to eat it entirely. i don't even remember the last time i had a complete meal.

with no other answer to give, i leave the table hastily. not aware that abby was following me.

my siblings and kaiden exchange looks and start discussing, while im heading towards my room.

suddenly i feel another touch on my hand and a voice.

'im sorry for blowing you off like that. i don't think so straight after these dreams.'

my head turns to face ms grange, who seemed serious.

'indie.. it's been 2 years, i trust you the most out of this entire world.. i just find it a bit difficult to open up about some of my issues..' she continues.

'abby..'

'im ready to talk about it. i can't hide forever, i'll only damage myself more.'

'all im asking you is to give me time.'

silence fills the hallway, and i give her weak smile.

'i'll give you all the time in the world.'

the ginger smiles at me back, and keeps my hand in her grasp as she drags me to another area.

at that moment, i felt some sort of, tingling sensation in my stomach.

never have been in touch with my feelings so i wasn't quite capable of identifying what it was. all i know is that it felt nice.

being around her just felt nice.

we enter her room and sit on her bed. i watched as she took some breaths and then sighed.

'my parents became pretty abusive after i came out.. they didn't like that i was gay. i recall how they'd call me slurs and belittle me for it. they were usually emotionally abusive,

until they became physical. '

my jaw dropped in shock.

she was always reluctant to talk about her parents as well their job as guardians.

and now i see why.

abby then explained that her mother was fat shaming her whilst her father was beating her numb.

she had to cut ties with me at some point because they were suspicious of me for being her girlfriend — although, it does explains why abby mysteriously disappeared for a short period of time.

'..it also came to the point where they wanted to kick me out of the residence, and that's when i took the matter into my own hands.'

my hand reached in for her hand but rejected my gesture.

'i.. presume you gained haphephobia in the process.'

she nodded in confirmation.

i felt my heart rate increase. this was terrifying and heartbreaking to hear from her. the fact that she didn't dare say a word because she was ashamed of herself made it worse.

i offered abby a tissue as she wiped her tears, while i was thinking of words to say.

'i am literally speechless at the moment.

but i want to acknowledge.. that i am so so proud of you for having the courage to open up about such a topic to me.'

a bit teary and doubtful, my friend reached in for a hug whilst i patted her back.

'i can't thank you and your family enough for everything.' she whispered into my ear, 'i hope i don't sound intrusive but.

how are you doing, indie?'

——-
WOOHOO YOU GET FLUFF, YOU GET FLUFF, EVERYONE GETS ✨fluff✨.
i am aware this is an emotional chapter, i hope i portrayed abby's and indie's situation well enough. chapters might change povs and be long in the future!
bid you all a good day, i'll attempt to update my other works, adios!

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words: 909