I was never yours

magic of acting?

Y/n pov|
I got my email. I WAS ONE OF THE MAIN CHARACTERS. I was really excited this wasn't my first time in a movie but I was very well excited, my sister had got a part as well in movie it wasn't a big part I suppose? I was really excited to be in a movie with her due to the fact we never really spent much time together growing up, she was either to busy with homework or in rehearsal for some movie or show. I was never really jealous of her movie and show roles because I got good show roles, I was jealous that she was the one to get our parents attention and they would attend to her movie premieres but for me they'd either be to busy? I suppose it's alright I never really wanted them to go because they'd be to judge mentally? Yes I do say I miss my parents but it's hard to say you miss them when they don't ever try to reach out, they tend to forget I exist, I am the oldest I'm supposed to get more attention kinda? Wrong my parents give every little attention to Amber it's fine because she the baby of the family although it would be nice to get a little bit of love once in a while after being the star of the family for about 3 years baby amber came along and she started acting when she was 7. I started acting when I was 3 or 4 I can't recall I always fancied acting or being a movie star. Although love isn't really my thing it would be lovely to fall in love and go on adventures. Sometimes I find myself dreaming about it other times I tend to dread of the idea of falling in love with someone I fell like love is just at some point a waste of time but it is wonderful to spend days with someone and just talking to them not worrying about wether people are snapping photos of you or if there trying to pictures of you. That's one thing I hate about being on movies and shows or being what people call "famous" I wouldn't say I'm a big movie star like Helena Bonham carter, or Johnny Depp, although I'd love to be in such roles as them two. Growing up I loved them in there roles, I loved Helena in Harry Potter as bellatrix loads of people seemed to hate bellatrix while on the other hand I loved her.
<time skip >
I got to the movie set, it was very beautiful I suppose I never really liked using the words beautiful, or pretty I guess it never really fancied me. They walked me up to where everyone else was I saw A bunch of extras and other people who were going be in the movie. David our director was just waiting on our other main character. We were supposed to be here at 9:30 it's almost 10 who does this person think they are. He then walked in as if he owned the place. Enzo Black.
"So sorry I'm late, traffic was horrible." He implied.
"yes traffic was horrible," I mumbled as I scoffed to my self.
He looked at me up and down and walked over
"I'm assuming you're my co-star?" he babbled with a smile
I glanced up at him and mocked him " Assume you're correct"
He chuckled, and said " You're really fun with big words"
We then got called over to get our scripts. Great, more educated and big words that would make me look more of a "know it all"
They talked and explained all of the expectations, what days we come whom are co workers were going to be.
"Ms. SaintClair and Mr. Black may I have a word?" Our director David called out to us.
Wonderful, Let's see what they have to say.
They put us in a room and discussed that there was going to be some sexual scenes. SEXUAL SCENES. lord have mercy, in my past movies I hated filming sexual scenes. Why you may ask? It's not that it's disgusting no not at all, but the idea of having to do it with people recording feels like we're recording a porno. They made us sign and make sure we give our full consent to make sure if anything happens there's proof that we gave consent and made sure we were fine with everything. I was a little bit hesitant about signing but being in this movie could help me build up more then just part time acting and instead become a real life actress who has fans, and has friends and actually become close with there cast members.
They wanted Enzo and I here tomorrow to film the beginning scenes where we met, this scene was the longest in the book the books were interesting but it got sad in the end since Tyler and Bella didn't get there happy ending. Tyler ended up dying leaving Bella broken and having her go through therapy. Later on Bella shared her adventures with Tyler, she shared every moment she spent with him. She made a book sold it ended up marrying but never loving him as much as she loved Tyler.
The book made me believe In some what of love, I wouldn't say it made me believe that there was someone in the world who loved you and wanted to be with you and loved you only. There's always that one person that thinks they love you but really just love that you're giving them somewhat attention, but with Bella and Tyler they loved each other till death, they grew up together. They got sick together, at some points I wonder where the heck is my Tyler? maybe I've found him just don't know.
I got home after I went to the gym to work out, I looked at my clock it marked " 9:53pm" I made me self a quick snack showered changed and get ready for bed because tomorrow we got a movie to shot.
{thoughts while drifting to sleep}
Enzo Black. Why do you have to be so beautiful. Did I just think of ENZO BLACK- omg omg no no I didn't, I tried forgetting what I just did but couldn't I was tossing and turn for about 10-15 minutes and finally I knocked out thinking about modeling.

Authors note|
Ew please this is lowkey cringe so far I finished writing this at 2:23am, I'm hoping to make this a big toxic, love triangle and then ending up with Enzo,  I want it to be like twisted and turned a bit of sexual writing, a bit of degrading stuff, and maybe some abusive stuff? I have a plot and everything just don't know how to you know get it together, the characters are HOT, you're very welcome.
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