It's been a long time since I saw you my love. I'm sorry because I didn't fight for you, I'm such a Coward. I'm sorry because you suffered because of me. I'm really really sorry hun.... I hope you're happy there.
I hope you already forgive me. I want you to know that I loved you andI still love until now. You made me happy like no one did. You gave me hope, strength and my happiness. And specially, you gave me all your love. You gave me the all you just to made me happy. I'm so thankful that I had you in my life love. I love so much my love.
Mom, who is she? Is she your friend? My daughter ask me while looking at the picture.
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She's the love of my life baby I told to my daughter while smiling.
But daddy is the love of your life. My daughter told me while pouting and crossing her arms.
Baby, I love your dad, but I love her more. I explained to my daughter.
How about daddy, are you going to leave him, us for her? My daughter questioned me.
No baby,I'm not because I promised to her that once I have a child, I will take care of you and love you like how much I love her. I told her and wiped my tears. I missed her so much.
Then where is she mommy? She asked me that make me cry even more.
She already left me baby, because mommy was a coward to fight for her. I told her while crying
Why you need to fight for her mom? And you're not a coward mommy, you can beat daddy up. I smiled at my daughter while wiping my tears.
Baby we used to love each other before. But in our generation, they can't accept the girl to girl relationship like now. Before I met your dad, we used to love each other. Kissed each other. And she made mommy happy very much. But when the time came, when your grandpa knew about us. He can't accept her as my love, as my girlfriend. Your grandpa told me that if I didn't break up with her, he will hurt her. You know your grandpa, he's very strict and powerful. And here I am the Coward, can't do anything to fight for her. She told me for many times that she will protect me and just trust her. But I didn't, and broke her heart. Mommy cheated on her with ur dad. And when she found it, she didn't cussed at me or shouted at me. But she smiled at me and told me 'You already made a choice, pls be happy my love. Always remember that I'm always here for u. I love you so much hun. Until we meet again. ’ I will not forgot those words baby, because that words made me regret everything I did. I said to my daughter while sobbing and remembering what happened to us.
Mommy please don't cry. Where is she now mommy? What was the promised you made for her? She asked me while wiping my tears. I smiled and told her..
She's gone now baby, she's very far that I will never chase and visit her. After a month of what happened, I heard that she diagnosed in leukemia stage 4. I was hesitating to visit her because I'm afraid,and I can't face her after what happened. But your auntie chu and chaeng convinced me. So I visited her, when I walked inside where her room is, I cried to see her suffering and laying in the bed lifeless. She noticed me and smiled at me. I cried and about to walked out, but she called me. I came to her side and hold her hand while sobbing. I kept saying sorry to her and telling her to forgive me. But she stops me, and told me that I'm already forgiven. After a minute of silence, she talked and told me that she loves me very very much. And she told me that if I have my own family, 'please if your child is a girl, name her Ella. And please love and protect her’. She told me that. That name of yours was our dream name to our own child. And after she told me that, she smiled sweetly at me even tho she's already struggling. And told me ' pls be happy OK, and don't blame yourself on what happened to me. It's not your fault baby. Always remember that I love you very much. Until we meet again hun’. And that was the last because after she said that, she gave up, she left me, us immediately. I think she just wait for me to come. Like what I promised to her, I will love you more than myself baby. I said to her while sobbing. I still longing for her. I missed her, so much.
Mommy I love you too. Promised I will take care of you, like how she took care of you. Me and daddy are always here for u mom. She told me and hugged me tight.
Sleep now baby, goodnight and mommy loves you so much.
I love you too mommy, goodnight. My daughter kissed my cheek then lie down. While my daughter is already sleeping, I took out her picture
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Goodnight my love, I hope you're happy where you are. Pls protect me, us always. And I hope when we meet each other again, I hope no one will be against us. You are the only one in my heart, and I will love you until my last breath like you used too. Forgive me my love. I love you so much.
You're my happiness, strength, hope and my half. You're the only one who can me feel safe and love. I love you so much my love, poopoo, boo, lili, hun.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LALISA MANOBAN TILL WE MEET AGAIN.
-JENNIE KIM-
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . I'm crying when I wrote this one. Its hurts to imagine those. 😢
This is a long chapter and my eyes hurt from crying 🙂
Anyways, I'm broke. I have no money, so no access HAHAHAHA. To those who have access, SANA OL.
