Bride by Design

C H A P T E R 10

WHERE LOVE WON'T STAY

Helena

My ears survived damage last night but I wasn't so sure it would at this nightclub. Andrei secured this gig for Lauren to gauge the quality of her music and what people, drunk raving adults, were into. I was not certain how these bunch of inebriated carefree patrons could contribute. A variety of liquors had already dulled their senses and it was only their bodies dancing to the disc jockey's rhythm like coordinated puppets tied to strings. I doubt they'd be able to comprehend or even compliment a masterpiece and if they could, how reliable would it be?

It was a Friday and was a good excuse for Lauren to give it another shot at playing cupid. She asked Karyssa to come and of course, urged me to join 'in the hopes I could be her producer or, at least, introduce her to my connections'. Lauren was a frightening liar-she lies with the truth; I was already her producer and Andrei was already at her disposal. It was only I who was scared of her act being discovered and my manipulations would again send Karyssa packing.

'... You don't need to play the hero. I don't need you anymore.'

Soon, she'd get her wish. Six out of seven, I only had less than twenty-seven hours free before I had to return to my routine and get back in the saddle-my new normal, without her. The two days passed into nothing and I had come to accept another truth: a woman that could love at such a degree could also hate with the same flaming passion. Even as it was just us in the VIP lounge, Karyssa couldn't bear to look at me without contempt coloring her eyes.

"Was she any good?" I asked though I already knew, "you think it would be worth it to help her?"

"Yes."

Succinct answers. She's been throwing one or two words at most, like an expensive telegram. All the while, she had her attention to where Lauren and her band were preparing to take the live stage.

The sea of sounds and dancing was getting too hyped up to my liking. It was already loud enough in my head but if it wasn't for the deal I made, I wouldn't stand hanging another minute in this bludgeoning club. The party scene was something I tolerated for minutes but we've been here for hours. A start of a wild headache was making my temples throb and a nauseating bile was rising from my stomach that I couldn't take another sip from my drink without compromising my dignity by puking it all out.

Karyssa shouldn't notice my clammy shaking hands or the beads of perspiration forming on my forehead so I took off my coat, laid it on my lap for cover, pushed my back against the leather seat and waited until the establishment's poor cooling system could squelch the burning sensation. I was under invisible fire.

I closed my eyes to hide and said, "If you say so, I'll set her up and give her a go."

I needed to get out before I made a fool of myself.

"See for yourself and for once, lend your ears."

I couldn't tell her I already did and there were many things I heard for the first time and too much I couldn't unhear.

"Why did you love me, Karyssa."

The use of the past tense was fitting as it was all in the past.

Even without seeing her face, I knew she was livid. Here I was thoughtlessly ramming at her heart and taking out a backhoe to exhume the casket of our relationship she'd already grieved over and worked so hard to bury.

"How do you manage to say the most insensitive things at the most inopportune moments?" she half-shouted so I could hear her over the noise.

"Was your fuse always this short?" We were answering questions with questions because honesty hurt and telling the truth was like pulling tooth with pliers without anesthesia. "Where did that patience of a saint go?"