5 Things I Want to Say

1. You shine. You're Beautiful

  The sound of my alarm clock woke me up. It was a sunny day. A great day to be at the park or at the beach or just outside. I took a peak outside my window. I saw children running, couples walking. I wish I could also enjoy the day too.

  As I look at my phone and saw the date, I realized that the day has come. The day that I hate every year.

~

 12 years ago, I was at school. We had a basketball game practice that day. I remember how happy I was. But then, the day I was accepted at the varsity, that was also the same day I was diagnosed with an acute cancer of the blood. Funny right?

  I was scared. I never really know what to do. I am afraid of leaving my parents, I am afraid of not being able to reach my dreams. And most of it all, I am afraid of dying. I refused to believe it was true. Until my doctor advised me to get admitted to the hospital and start the treatment. My parents were able to keep it as a secret from our relatives. 

  Thinking of being alone in a hospital room sucks. I hate being in the hospital. I hate everything about hospitals. It makes you feel hopeless. Unfortunately, I have no choice but to agree since I still want to reach my dreams.

  That day, mom left me inside my hospital room and went back to work. And I was just there, lying on my bed, looking at the white surroundings doing nothing. It was soooo boring. The nurse would just come from time to time just to check on me.

  It was a miracle that I fell asleep despite of my worries staying there. I never realized that the door was left open that someone entered my room. I didn't bother opening my eyes just to see who it was. Until she dropped something.

"Sorry! I'm really sorry!" The girl said.

I managed to sit and glared at her.

"What brings you here? Who are you?" 

"I'm Aina." She said with a smile.

"I am asking you why are you here." I asked.

"Sorry for barging in, I just saw that you're alone here, and you haven't eaten anything." I rolled my eyes.

"As if you care." I said as I was about to lie down.

"I just came here to give you food. My dad is on the next room. I just want you to have this."

The girl handed me a lunch box.

"I was about to eat it but I noticed you were alone. Don't worry, it's nutritious. Eat it."

She said and walked away.

I really hate it when people asks me to do things I don't want to do. I ignored that lunch box. But she was too persistent. Days passed and she continues to to the same thing.

"When will you get tired doing these things?" I asked as she again left a lunch box on the table.

"Hm. Until you get out of the hospital?" She smiled.

A week passed and I still need to stay at the hospital. It was really boring. I asked the nurse if I can stay near the hospital garden. And she willingly said yes.

I closed my eyes and tried to listen to whatever sound I could hear on my surroundings.

And then I heard someone singing. Every word from that song made me cry. I was reminded of my situation, my dreams and my family. I could not control myself at that time. I cried it all out loud until someone wiped my tears away. I  slowly opened my eyes and saw this annoying girl.

This time, her presence didn't annoy me.

She gave me a warm smile and said. "I know it's hard. But everything will be alright."

And that was the start of how my emotions towards her changed. That moment, it feels like she was shinning.

"Hold my hand and I'll be with you on this journey."