Stronger Than You Think

Lonely?

{-Sabre's POV-}

I was thinking, thinking way too hard about this. My headache was now a migraine. A very very very bad migraine but I didn't care because I needed to figure out. Why we are having these headaches and who is this person that is doing this. Why they always have fire involved with them and so much more. Just thinking about it made my head hurt more. I leaned forward putting my hands on my head and on my desk. I closed my eyes and just thought.

I sighed and then Lucas came in and looked at me. I leaned back and looked at Lucas. He looks sad and confused.

"Colleen told me that you are feeling empty. But what kind of empty." Lucas asked
I looked at him and was shocked I sighed.
"I don't know to be exact Lucas. I just feel empty and I'll be fine." I said
"I know you're not fine Sabre. I've known you for too long and you know that." Lucas explained
"I know Lucas it's just hard. Yeah know." I replied
"Maybe it's because you're alone Sabre. You've lived alone for so many years." Lucas said
"I know that Lucas. But you know why I live alone." I told Lucas
"I know but they died years ago you can't still blame yourself for that Sabre." Lucas replied 
"I-I I don't know Lucas. I-I I just-." I couldn't speak but I tried too
"Sabre it's ok. Your adopted mom died because of a sickness you couldn't do anything about that. And your adopted brother may have killed himself but you did nothing wrong." Lucas said while walking over to me
I stayed quiet because I didn't know what to say. The memories were too much and too sad for me even if they happened years ago I still can't get over it. Lucas was right in front of me by now. I took a step towards him and we hugged each other.

{Time skip to after they are done working for the day Sabre goes home to his house}

I got out of my car and went to my front door. I got my keys from my pockets and opened the door and went inside. I put down my bag by the door and went into my kitchen to make myself some dinner. When I got to the kitchen I opened my fridge and grabbed ingredients to make a sandwich because I didn't feel like making anything else. I didn't feel like making anything else because of what Lucas said to me. It just stuck to me.

"Me feeling lonely. I never thought about it." I mummer while sighing sitting down thinking about this
"Maybe I should call Lucas. No not Lucas Spency he works with kids everyday. Maybe I can adopt a kid or foster one. Yeah Imma call Spency." I said my thoughts aloud because I do that a lot

I got up from my chair and went to go grab my bag. I got to my bag and got my phone out of it then I dialed Spency. He picked up his phone in seconds because I heard.

"Hello." Spency said
"Hey Spency I have a few questions for you if that's ok." I asked
"Umm yeah Sabre that's fine just a second I'm going to go into a different room so Colleen can't hear us." Spency replied 
"Ok and thanks." I said
"No problem man, I'm always happy to help you." Spency said
There was silence for a little while but I could hear Spency walking then talking to Colleen because I could hear Colleen asking where are you going or something on the line like that. But what Spency said was what I assumed was none of your business Colleen this is between me and someone else not you. I was happy he didn't say my name but I knew he wouldn't say my name because Spency can keep secrets and can keep them well. He also is very overprotective of me when I just want to talk to him or if there is anything I want to talk about with him. He doesn't let anyone come between our conversations and I'm glad about that.
"Hey I'm in my room so Colleen can't hear us and sorry it took so long Colleen wouldn't let me go because you know how noisey my Little sister is." Spency told me
"You're fine Spency I'm just glad I could talk to you because this is really bothering me I guess." I replied
"Ok then. What's wrong Sabre." Spency said in a worried tone
"I wanted to know what it feels like to have children around you." I asked
"Umm ok I ummm didn't expect this but may I ask why and what you mean like when you said having children around you." Spency asked very shocked
"I thought you may ask that. I well... It happened at work ok. I was feeling this empty feeling and Lucas said it probably is because I'm lonely. I haven't let anyone in my house ever since my adopted mom died and I just guess I didn't notice until now and I wanted to try to foster a kid. To see if it really is because I'm lonely or if it's something else Man." I explained to Spency 
"Ok then Sabre. Well let me tell you this it really does depend and what I mean by that is. Some kids can be very happy and they are just a bunch of joy. Some can be trouble makers, they are still fun to be around, they just cause a lot of trouble. Lastly some can be very sad because they have a lot of trama's or bad memories you will have to work with those kids but once they trust you they don't really want to leave you." Spency explained to me
"Oh ok thanks Spency that helps a lot. Now I have to go and finish my song that someone asked me to make." I said
"Oh yeah man see ya can't wait to hear it!" Spency said
"Yeah see ya and I'll send it to you when I finish it." I said
"Ok I'll wait and listen to it right away when I get it. Colleen will also listen to it." Spency says
"Thanks man see ya and thanks again." I say
"No problem bye." Spency says
"Bye." I said and hung up the phone

I sighed and then went upstairs to my room so I could finish up the song I was writing. This song was going to be about someone not knowing what their heart wants or something like Somehow without a heart. This song is supposed to be somewhat about me and the topic being sad and confused. So this song asks a lot of questions and tells people to Stop being kind or telling them to do something to them. Because they are too confused on what to feel or on what is happening with them.

A few hours later I finally finished the song I called it kokoronashi (That's the real name of the song BTW) the song is not in english because the person that asked me to make this song asked if it could be in a different language and I said sure because I can speak more than one language. I recorded it and when I finished recording it I sent it to Spency because I said I would. When I sent it. I got a message saying.

"I'm listening to it right now and grabbing Colleen. I can't wait to hear it Sabre! I know it will be amazing. Also do you remember Ash? From Highschool she is over at my house she is going to listen to it too! Hope you don't mind!" Spency said in the text message I received.
I replied back with "Of course she can and yeah I remember her. How's she doing? I haven't seen her since High school. It's been like 5 years. Also I forgot to tell you the song is called kokoronashi and it's not in English just to let you know. And hey do you mind if you came over tomorrow?" I texted
Spency replied "Yeah I can come over tomorrow. Also Ash is doing great she says."
I replied with "Thanks Man and I'm glad. Well imma go to sleep now bye! And come around 12:30!"
Spency texted "Alright man be there at 12:30 and Goodnight."
I texted "Goodnight."
I plugged in my phone by my desk, got dressed to go to bed and went to sleep. 

(1449 words)

Hey guys sorry for the wait TwT haha hope you enjoyed this chapter! Sorry for any spelling errors! And hope you are having a fantastic Day or Night!
-ItzFnaf Moosey