The Yandere inside me

The beginning of something (part 1)

On the first day, I was escorted into a classroom, room 615 to be exact. The door was colorful and decorated like a pony had taken a fat shit on it. I walked up to the door and took three deep breaths and eventually, I walked in.

"you must be the new student. Have a seat over there next to Kayla." I take my seat.

Not that it matters but Kayla went to my elementary school but she was nothing to me. Well, nothing more than an ugly bitch who used to pick on me as a kid.

"RING RING" Everyone grabs their belongings and rushes to their next class but sadly I was interrupted by the one and only WHATEVER HER NAME WAS... "Allison i- I think you're in the wrong class."

I was furious for a person who was actually diagnosed with anxiety. It was tough for me to walk into a classroom full of strangers the first time, but now I have to do it again.

I went straight down to the main office to find out what I had to do. They gave me a classroom number and floor number. I went to the second floor and the class they told me...class 611.

Once I walked in it was like I was the only worm in a pack of birds. All eyes were on me. I started to shake uncontrollably it's like I was thrown in a freezer, taken out, and being shaken around like a rattle. "Allison right? Have a seat over there." I head to my seat and look around at all the students then, my eyes land on one person.

He was perfect to stare at, but I had to look away from him before he thought I was weird, But I couldn't. All of these girls were around him but it was like they disappeared and only she and he were in the room. Of course, the "she" was me.

For the next few days, all I could think about was him. All I wanted to think about was him. All I could dream about was him. All of my attention was on him. Slowly my staring turning into watching and my watching turned into stalking. I didn't care all I wanted to do was be with him, my heart ached for him. I knew I was stalking him. I really did but I just didn't mind. He was and still is everything to me.

Even after 2 years...

I've had crushes besides him but he will always be my number one. Throughout the years I wondered what was wrong with me no it wasn't that it was,

Why was I obsessed with this boy who has never spoken to me?

Why was I willing to sacrifice my time to learn and waste it all on him?.

I was confused. I never felt this way before and it was too late to stop myself. I was in love. So in love that every time I saw him with another girl I would burst into tears and my tears turned into rage.

The rage caused me to feel like I had to hurt this girl for her to get her away from him. Like I had to kill this girl to get her away from him. To get her away from MY senpai but I was too late he was in love. She didn't love him but he loved her. I ran to the bathroom trying to figure out WHAT THE FUCK was wrong with me. Why did I feel like killing an innocent girl because the guy I love likes her? But still, him having a little crush did hurt me but wasn't the problem. The problem was me.

Once the bell for the last period rang I ran home right after I watched him walk home with his friends. I opened my computer and searched for the question that I've been waiting for an answer to. "What does it mean when you love someone so much that you would go as far as killing everyone around them just so they can love you and only you?" The answer I got was " This usually indicates that you are a Yandere: A character, usually, a girl, who fits the archetype of being genuinely kind, loving, or gentle, as well as obsessed with their love interest, sometimes demonstrating this through violent behavior."

I smiled then started to cry and mumbled with a soft and slightly depressing tone.

"Fuck....."