Her First Love

ELEVEN

Nicole shivered as she entered her room at the boarding house, and then quickly closed the door, locking it. Her panicked mind created ways for her to get out of town. However, with the snowstorm, she wouldn't be going anywhere soon.

She moved to the small hearth and quickly started a fire. As heat began to fill the room, she rubbed her hands together. As she stared into the fire, tears filled her eyes. She didn't know what she was more frustrated over. Was it that Edward had somehow found her? Or was it because she'd finally found love, only to lose it.

This wasn't fair at all. Why had her life turned out so terrible? Most of it she blamed on her father. If he hadn't kept her from men... If he hadn't kept her from meeting new people... If he hadn't lost his mind, he would have remembered about those people he was stealing money from when they thought they were making donations to the church.

If only she had given it back to the congregation.

Her father's sermons about thou shalt not steal came to mind. She'd pretty much kept the ten commandments, only breaking two of them. Besides stealing, she wasn't honoring her father. How could she after learning what he'd done and all the people he'd made mad? If not for his bad choices, she wouldn't have had to leave.

At least she hadn't killed anyone while trying to escape, even though she'd injured Edward Patterson. She hadn't meant to harm him, but at the time, she'd been fighting for her life and what she'd thought was hers.

A sob sprang from her throat, and she fell on the bed, slamming her fist against the mattress. Something dropped underneath the bed, startling her as she raised her legs on top of the bed. She listened for any other sounds like the squeak of a rat or mouse, but nothing was detected. Cautiously, she set her feet on the floor and crouched down. Under the bed lay a book, but not just any book.

Intrigue grew inside Nicole and she picked up a journal and flipped to the first page. This had belonged to Brenda!

Nicole hopped back on the bed and leaned back against the wall, skimming through the pages of her cousin's life. Brenda seemed to enjoy working at the saloon, and had made great friends with the others. In some of the journal entries, Brenda had written about men who paid for her favors, and that although Brenda didn't like it, the money was good.

Nicole's face heated profusely. She couldn't understand why the girls would choose to ruin themselves like that instead of saving themselves for their husband. Did they not want to fall in love and marry?

She wasn't sure how much time had passed as she became engrossed in her cousin's sinful life, but then Nicole stumbled upon a name... a man's name that jumped out from the pages.

Today I kissed my boss, Caleb West. It wasn't supposed to happen. He'd attended the hanging of one of his brothers and was in a bad way. Perhaps it was the alcohol Caleb West had consumed so much of, or maybe it was meant to happen. Either way, I think I'm falling in love with him. He's such a sweet man, and he strives to make not only his employees happy, but his patrons, as well.

Nicole's chest tightened, and knots formed in her stomach. Caleb had told her that he never kissed any of the other girls, which meant... He lied!

Groaning, she fell to her side and curled in a ball. More tears came as her heart began to break. There was nothing for her here in Stumptown. Not any longer. Yet, where else could she go? Returning to Billings would be a huge mistake. She was sure she had other family, but she'd never met any of her other cousins or aunts and uncles. It wasn't as if she could just show up on their doorstep and introduce herself, expecting them to welcome her with open arms.

Never had she felt more desolate as she did at this moment. Truly, she was alone in the world, and she couldn't rely on anyone. She couldn't trust anyone, either.