I don't know if it was your words
I don't really know if it was because I was desperate
I don't really understand why it had to happen
Now I'm not allowed to have the freedom I wished to touch
I'm stuck in the room where it began and ended
I'm stuck in the same mindset
Yet somehow I miss the comfort of my sadness
How being content felt forced or something mustered out
I wish I could stop trying but I don't want to at the same time
The blood gushes out of my arms
The sand pours out my mouth
The spiders crawl out of my fingertips
And oil spills from my eyes
I'm tired of screaming
And I'm hurt by the violation I felt
And the fact I can't be open about it
