One night, Jean x Reader

The Night Before...

"I'm ready to let loose!" Hange yells as slamming open the door to our dorm.

She's always so loud. I wish she would calm down sometimes, but I love her.

"I know right I'd love to go partying" I replied sarcastically back to her, while laying back on my bed stretching out my legs. She knew I was lying, I'm a homebody. The frat boys down the street are always throwing parties. I don't usually go because... he's always there.

"Tomorrow night Connie is throwing a party, we should totally go. Levi told me he would give us a ride" Hange yelled in excitement.

I didn't usually like parties but... this time I was feeling like leaving the house. She always persuades me..I don't know how but she manages to.

"Who do you think will be there" I asked already knowing the answer.

"The usual" we both said at the same time.

Hange loves partying, she's so out there... I look up to her for that. I'm so introverted, but she's such a party animal. I need her to teach how to break loose from my shell.

Oh great as soon as I was about to ask Hange something—....

"HEYYYYY GIRLLL" screams Petra

She's such a loud ass. As much as they both get on my nerves, I wouldn't want anyone else to be my roommates.

But they make me feel sorta life an outcast. Hange and Levi have been hooking up ever since senior year of high school and now we're juniors in college. Petra... she just goes with anyone honestly. She does her own thing. She's always out with some random hooking up or using them to go out to a nice place to eat. She's living the life, they both are, but then there's me. But that's going to change tomorrow night.

It was already really late once Hange and Petra settled down and fell asleep. It's 12am now. I usually stay up way later then them anyways but tonight was different.. for some reason I was feeling anxiety about going to a party. Probably because it has been so long since I got to let loose and go to a party. As I was scrolling through Instagram with my eyes barely opened a notification on my phone went off.

"Hey, I was wondering if you were going tomorrow night"

Why did he have to text me?.... Why now?....

....

.......

Why am I still awake it's 3 in the morning. So many thoughts are running through my head. I opened my phone up and started scrolling through Instagram when I see he posted a story. Fuck it was posted 3 minutes ago he's going to know I'm awake. I'm such an idiot. I'll just text him back.

"Lol, yeah I am"

Was that to bland? He's going to think I'm being dry. Damn it should I double text. No I shouldn't I'm overthinking again. Now we wait for a reply....

It's been 5 minutes and I've checked to see if he read it every 10 seconds. I started typing when I seen he finally read it.

"Good haha... what you doing up this late"

Of course he had to make me crack a smile. He knows I hate him but these feelings I'm getting from just him texting me...after we haven't talked in months.

"Just stuff on my mind, why are you up"

I shouldn't of said that back, he's definitely going to ask me what's on my mind. But I want him to ask. I seen Hange start to roll over in her bed and open her eyes. I faked sleep because I didn't want her to know I was awake, she always has to wake up at the worst times. Thank god she's just going to the bathroom and will probably go back to sleep.

After Hange laid back down I opened my phone and seen he texted back.

"Lol same, why do you think I texted you?"

I can't handle this right now. Why do I feel this warm fuzzy feeling right now...I miss him but he's just toying with me. He knows I'm wrapped around his finger. But ever since that happened I don't know if I'll ever be the same.

Some nights I just miss his touch. The way he made me laugh and gave me those butterflies. I haven't been with anyone ever since we broke it off for good. No sex ever since either which I clearly miss. Sometimes I find myself touching myself while thinking about the faces and things he used to say to me. I need to stop, I know but... I can't. He was a apart of me I don't want to let go but I promised myself I would. Why did he text me anyways??

"I don't know...why did you text me??"

He's going to think I'm playing stupid, which I am but I also really want to know..just why??