Lonely Shade of Blue

TEN: In Breakable Heaven

TEN

'In Breakable Heaven'

The silence in Carmen's house was long, heavy, laced with discomfort, and pregnant with thoughts, misconceptions, the words hanging over their heads. Carmen felt her heart constrict – and she thought that this couldn't be, that there must be an explanation, that she's just making a bad situation become worse, but the pain bit at her, gnawed at her insides until she felt weak. She felt her knees buckle, and she feared that at any time, her legs might give in.

She looked at Ariel who was staring at her pleadingly – asking her without words to listen, and Lord knew she wanted to, but she couldn't do that now. Not when she was too angry to look at things objectively.

It was probably lucky that her Ate Laura was her, because she sprang into action, trying to diffuse the situation between Gab and Ariel. Carmen didn't think she could even be in the same room at the moment.

"Gab," Ate Laura said in her commanding voice, making the two men snap their attention at her. Gab was still agitated, but his expression softened at the warning look on Laura's face. Laura turned to Ariel, murmuring quietly, "I think it's best if you leave for now."

Ariel looked at Laura and shook his head, "I just want to –," he began but Ate Laura held her hand up.

"I know," she said knowingly, nodding slowly. "But look at her, she's not in a good state. She needs a minute."

She needed more than a minute (and perhaps, an entire bottle of Merlot), but still Carmen bristled at anyone speaking for her – even if it was her sister-in-law (whom she loved very much), and even if she was right – so she squared her shoulders and breathed deeply, looking at Ariel straight in the eye.

"Ate's right," she told him, noting that her voice was shaky. She cleared her throat and tried to look and be stronger than she felt. "I need to process this."

"Carmen," he said, beseechingly, looking at her with wide eyes, and she wanted to melt, wanted to give in now, afford him the benefit of the doubt, but the thought of him betraying her after everything they had shared inched its way to her mind and she felt anger taking over, and she couldn't – she couldn't right now.

"I'll talk to you later, Ariel, please," she begged in return, and he must have seen the sheer desperation in her eyes, for he nodded, acquiescing. He bid his goodbye before walking out of her house, shutting the door softly behind him.

This day had started out so fucking well.

How did it go so wrong?

Where did they go so wrong?

It's Ate Laura's arms that wrapped around her body just as she felt her body give in, her legs caving. The weight of today's revelation found her drowning, sinking into the depth of the lies she hadn't even seen. She felt her heart breaking and a tear made its way down her cheeks.

She didn't want to cry in front of her brother, but it wasn't like she had a choice here.

"I'm fine," she told her sister-in-law, as she tried to stand up straight, brushing her tears away and trying to not show how much pain she was in at the moment. Her hands clenched into fists as she tried to buoy herself. "I just need a moment."

Then before either of them could see her breakdown, she went up the stairs to her bedroom, closing the door behind her gently before she collapsed on the floor.