Eve

Part II

One week has passed since Father Roberto's demise. Eve and Kathrin were inside the chapel, arranging the altar for the funeral, which was to take place in the afternoon. Other Sisters were in the far back, lingeringly going from bench to bench, placing the prayer booklet on each one. Once the long white cloth on the altar was pressed smooth, Eve lifted her eyes and looked Him, her eyes filled with tears. She gazed at Him a moment when Kathrin grabbed her shoulder gently, rousing her out from adoration. She slowly turned her head and looked at her friend.
-It is a sad day. But he is in a better place now Evie. He does not suffer anymore; he bathes in Our Lord's divine light. Kathrin said softly, sadly.
Eve turned her pale blue eyes away, tears escaping from them.
-I wish only to be in this light as well Katy. The sweet of His divine presence...Eve started before lifting her eyes to her friend, seeing her concerned eyes upon her.
-Evie, you know very well self-destruction it is an act of blasphemy in the eyes of God. Kathrin reprimanded her silently as loud footsteps made their way up to them. Don't speak about it any longer.
Eve remained silent, looking down at the altar as another nun approached them rapidly.
-I heard Mother Superior talking with the Archbishop. The new arrival whispered with hint bliss in her voice. The Cardinal appointed a new priest to the convent. He'll be arriving this afternoon.
Eve raised her eyes and looked at her with a mix of interest and slight anger.
-Sister Gabriella, you know it is frowned upon to gossip. Kathrin said sternly. What if Mother Superior heard you?
-We have not even buried Father Roberto and they are already speaking of replacing him. Eve griped with rage as Kathrin turned to look at her.
-Until they tell us, all this is hear-say. Prattle. She said sternly before turning once more to look at Gabriella. Go now Sister Gabriella, return to your tasks before Mother Superior catches us talking and reprimands us.
Imperceptible, Gabriella gave a rapid, spiteful glace in Eve's direction before departing. Eve could not shake the feeling that what Gabriella had said was true. They surely would replace Father Roberto, a congregation could not exist without a priest. But it was so soon. He had been gone for only one week, they had not even buried him yet, and already they found someone to fill his position. She looked up at Him with angry eyes, searching strength inside herself to overcome this feeling.
-Best we continue our tasks as well. She whispered inaudibly, walking away from the altar and up to a small, round pine table filled with piles of prayers booklets.
Kathrin followed her, looking at her.
-Evie, do not be upset. Gabriella's eavesdropping reports may not be true. Kathrin said softly as Eve took some of the booklets in her hands, turned and walked up to the first bench.
Kathrin imitated her friend in her task.
-I am no fool Katy. I know very well they will need to replace him in times. I just thought that they would let us lament his loss. Eve replied. For a moment, at least.
-Even if they replace him today, Evie, you heart can grieve in silence. We all mourn his loss in silence. Kathrin said mutely.
Eve turned and looked at her.
-You are right Katy. Eve conceded silently and they continued distribution the booklets quietly.

That afternoon, the convent reunited inside the cathedral, sat quietly. Eve looked down at her pale hands, her skin as white as snow, holding back tears. Soon after, the small wooden door of the sacristy opened and Mother Superior walked into the vast room and up to the altar. She spoke solemnly.
-Rise up my Sisters, for on this day, we are to bid our farewells to Father Roberto. The nun spoke seriously, standing before the rising crowd. Cardinal Feliciano was gracious enough to bless us with a new leader to our congregation. Please welcome Father David to our parish.
Eve kept her eyes down, looking at her black shoes as the priest, a man with pale blue-green eyes, dark salt and mostly pepper hair, and a roughly cut beard and moustache, approached the altar. All eyes were on him, all except Eve's. She gazed down at her black robe, sobbing silently. It had been true; Gabriella had not lied. They had not even buried him that the Cardinal had before long appointed his replacement. Eve shook her head with desolation, her eyes remaining on her habit.
-I am much honored to be part of your congregation. The newly appointed friar spoke somberly, his voice a low, deep voice. Though I did not have the honor of knowing Father Roberto myself, I have heard only virtuous words about him. He was a great man of grand generosity, kindness and benevolence. All will surely miss him.
Eve sighed silently, melancholically as tears streamed down her face. She turned her head slowly to look at Kathrin who was standing next to her.
-Katy, I cannot be here now. Eve whimpered mutely, Kathrin turning to look back at her. Too upset I am.
Gabriella turned to glare at them.
-Have some respect for the new Father Sister Eve. She said with sympathy, silently. I understand that you are upset but I am certain you do not want him to feel unwelcomed.
Eve turned to look at her before noticing Mother Superior glaring at her. She kept silent, posing her eyes on her robe once more. Docile and disciplined, she thought, and God would give her the strength to overcome all obstacles. She would be resilient to face the challenge He had set in her path. She would prove to Him that she was worthy of His sublime embrace. She would bathe in His holy light; she was his loyal servant. She raised her eyes passed the new priest standing before them, passed the altar, to Him. He was beautiful; His glory embraced her completely. Nothing this world could be as magnificent as His compassion. Eve's eyes filled with worship, grief slowly melting away. Kathrin gazed at her a moment before turning and looking at the holy man standing before them, an indistinguishable smile on her face.
-I would like us to reflect upon the words of God. Please take your Bibles and read from Psalm 23 with me. The man spoke seriously as the convent before him obeyed him.
Eve looked down at the black words printed on the white, fragile sheet as the man started reading.
-The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for His name's sake. The pastor read gravely as Eve at last lifted her eyes to look at him.
The pastor's gaze swept across the room slowly, intensity on his handsome features. Then their eyes met.
-Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. He recited solemnly, his gaze remaining on Eve. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
-Surely, your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Eve murmured quietly, her beautiful blue eyes remaining on the man before the congregation.
His charms were triumphant; he was handsome, very handsome. Never in her lifetime had she seen a man as striking. She gawked at him as he continued his sermon. Softy, Kathrin nudged her elbow, pulling her out of her reverie. Eve turned her eyes to her, suddenly feeling tremendous shame and self-loathing.
-I must leave. She whispered silently, handing her Bible over to her friend.
-They will entomb Father Roberto Evie; you must attend the burial. You were his pupil. He loved you dearly. Kathrin replied silently.
Eve's eyes remained on her a moment as she nodded in agreement. For the funerals she stayed, her eyes remaining on her robe, never rising to the man before them. Quaintly, she pinched the thin skin between her thumb and her index harshly, inflicting pain upon herself.

Soon, they put Father Roberto's remains in the ground behind the cathedral. While all departed, walking back to the convent, Eve remained at the burial site, her head bowed, soundlessly crying.
-Miss you dearly I will Father. May God have your soul, may you be content in His glorious light. Eve said mutely, tears in her eyes as she kneeled down and took some of the freshly stirred earth in her pale hand. How I will miss you...
She broke down completely, letting floods of tears run down her cheeks, her shoulders shrugging up and down at every sob.
-Oh how I wish to be in that light. She whimpered voicelessly. I am lost without your guidance Father. I can feel the darkness slowly surrounding me...
Suddenly, she heard the fallen leaves of the end of autumn behind her crinkle underneath footsteps and in the air, the smell of burnt tobacco floated. She turned her head slightly, noticing the new friar walking to her, holding a cigarette between his fingers. She rose up rapidly, wiping the tears from her face quickly with the long sleeves of her habit.
-You should come inside now Sister. The funeral has finishes several hours ago. The friar said softly, looking at her as he raised the cigarette and took a drag on it leisurely.
Eve remained silent, bowing her eyes to avoid his eyes. Expelling the smoke from his lungs, the priest threw the cigarette to the ground and crushed it with the heel of his shoe.
-Repulsive habit. He said calmly, lifting his eyes to look at Eve.
Gently, the priest slid his fingers under her chin and lifted her head to make her look at him. He smiled at her with warmth.
-It is a time of melancholy and grief. However, when losing someone close to us, we must also remember to look outside ourselves and rejoice for them as they ascend to a better place. The priest said tenderly, gazing at Eve. With Our Lord he is now.
Eve nodded silently, tears forming in her eyes once more. The friar drew her in closer, wrapping his arms around her to hug her. Eve remained of stone, paralyzed with dread.
-I understand the sadness Sister. I myself have lost my mother last spring to dementia. He continued silently, holding the nun in his arms. Time is necessary to heal. However, as time passes, we learn to accept their departure and woe dwindles gradually.
Timidly, Eve pulled away from his embrace.
-I must go now Father. Your words are kindness, but I must leave. Eve said voicelessly before walking away from the holy man swiftly.
-Sister Eve! The friar exclaimed with incomprehension as the nun continued her way towards the convent.

Later that evening, Eve was inside her small, grey stone room once more, kneeling down on the stone floor, praying to the God on the crucifix before her.
-Forgive me my Lord for I am but a sinner. Eve prayed silently, remorse in her eyes as she gazed at Jesus on his cross. Lord, please help me repel these immoral feelings I...
Suddenly, she heard something stirring behind her, crawling, slithering across the floor. She detached her eyes from the crucifix and turned to see a white scaled snake with glowing red eyes creeping towards her. She rapidly stood up and moved up to her cottage bed, her fearful eyes never leaving the creature.
-Stand down devil. I banish you. Eve exclaimed panicked, grabbing her bible and frantically when through it, her eyes going back and forth from the snake to the book until she found the Psalm she searched. Protect me Lord, from the power of the wicked; keep me safe from violent people who plot my downfall. The proud have set a trap for me; they have laid their snares, and along the path, they have set traps to catch me.
The snake crawled lingeringly towards her cottage bed, the small slits of its bright red eyes glaring at her. She coward in the far corner of her bed, pulling her legs close to her body, her terrorized eyes remaining on the beast, holding her bible tightly.
-Please benevolent Lord, I beg of you to take this tempter away from me. I will repent; I will sanction myself in your name. I will heed to thy laws, as you command. I will bow to your feet and bathe in your rapture. Oh my Lord, I beg of you. Eve insisted as tears formed in her eyes. I am profoundly apologetic for my sins. I know I have been disobedient; I should not have gazed at Father David in that manner. I am deeply regretful. Please forgive me my Lord.
The snake contoured her bed slowly, and then turned away and creeped towards the large wooden door. Eve watched it as it slid under the door, to be seen no more. She let go of her legs and sighed out of relief. She turned and posed her grateful eyes on Jesus once more.
-Thank you my Lord. She whispered with gratitude, as she slid to the edge of her bed and seized a slim, wooden branch resting on the side of a large, brown chest next to her cot.
She stood up slowly, put down the branch on her bed, undid the buttons from her long, black robe, and slid the garment off, leaving her standing in her immaculate white chiffon under slip. She seized the branch again, kneeling down before the crucifix. Bowing her head low, she began flagellating herself harshly, the branch leaving thin, bloody lacerations on the pale, white skin of her back.
-I repent my Lord, for I am but a feeble sinner. Eve spoke soundlessly, wincing at every painful lashing. I repent my Lord, for I am but a feeble sinner.