Loving You Still

Laurel

It's the two year anniversary of his death and I still feel like it was yesterday that he waved at me through the car window and mouthed the words "I love you". Mom came into my room to make sure I was ready for the small service his family was putting on. I looked ready but mentally I was far from it. The neck less he got me might as well be tattooed on my neck since i haven't taken it off. It was a present he got me for our sixth month anniversary, it's silver with the letter "T" in the middle for "Tate". Even the thought of his name throws me off the path of control. Mom and I had left the house after we ate a quick breakfast. As soon as we arrived Tate's sister ran up to me and as usual was very happy to see me. Her name was Sam, short for Samantha. She had short auburn curly hair with piercing blue eyes and she was nine years old. I could tell she missed her brother but she was strong for how young she was, especially since her mother was a big mess with Tate being gone and their father never being in the picture. We had small talk about school and how its been at home but then the service started, the priest said a few words and then people were allowed to go up and share stories. That's when I noticed Tate's best friend John as he made his way up to the front of the room. He tried to say something but he was just as torn as I would be if I tried anything like that. At the end of the service I went to go talk to John. He started rambling as soon as I approached him, "I thought I could do it Laurel, I really did but I'm not ready to share how I feel without completely losing it." As I handed him a tissue I said "There's nothing wrong with how you reacted up there, I would have been the same way." We hugged and then I said my goodbyes to everyone else and mom and I drove home.