WOUNDS THAT NEVER HEAL || tommy shelby x reader

chapter ten

"I thought you weren't afraid of me anymore," Tommy spoke calmly. You didn't drop the gun.

"I told you not to get involved," You tried so hard to keep your voice steady, but your anger was making your entire body vibrate. He'd followed you—

He'd ruined everything.

"I had it under control—I was fixing it,"

"No," Your finger twitched on the trigger at his bluntness.

"No?"

"They had men stationed outside. Two out front, one out back, all armed."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. You didn't want to hear it.

"You were surrounded. They just made it seem like you had the upper hand. The Kinsmen don't mess around, Y/N. They're exactly like—,"

"You? Exactly like you?"

He stopped, shooting you a frown. He was wearing the same clothes as this morning, just with his long coat thrown over the top. You'd been in such a rush you hadn't even stopped to think about him following you.

You dropped your arm with the gun, clicking the safety on as it dangled by your side.

"Why did you follow me?" You asked him.

The two seconds before his reply felt like the past two years; long, disappointing, like you were trying to let go of something that you were holding onto for dear life. Tommy had a way with expressions that made him seem like stone; cold and rough and everything the opposite of what you knew him to be, in some instances.

"Instinct," He replied, but it just made your blood boil further.

"Instinct—fucking instinct." You raised your eyes to the ceiling, trying to calm yourself down. "Your instinct has just put me on the radar of every gang in London. Your instinct has compromised the safety of my club, my staff—,"

"Your safety was already hanging on by a fucking thread. They would have taken your business today if it weren't for me—,"

"You didn't have the right!" You screamed, the revolver dropping from your grasp. You wracked your hands through your hair, so tightly that you were close to ripping all of it out. "It wasn't your decision to intervene, Tommy. You took that away from me,"

Tommy huffed defensively.

"Took what from you? The possibility of you being shot by the fucking Kinsmen?"

"The possibility of calling for you myself," You said finally. You were seething, so angry at everything that you didn't even think about telling him this secret. Tommy's eyes only widened. "You were my initial protection, Tommy. But a last resort— one that I wasn't planning on using today, or ever for that matter."

Your chest inhaled and exhaled rapidly, your lungs trying desperately to gain enough air to calm yourself down. You'd just told him the one thing you hadn't told anyone; that you were still willing to rely on the Shelby's; that in putting that kind of trust in them, you still thought about them; they still lived within you.

Tommy stared at you in awe.

"What?" Tommy chided. It sounded like childish confusion—not just a question, but utter shock and concern and fear threaded within it.

"It doesn't matter anymore. You've gone and done it," You found yourself crouching to the floor, your hands instinctively coming up to hide your face. You hadn't sat like this since you were a child, but in that moment, you almost wished you were one again—