Arms Of A Stranger

night without sleep

Niall's POV

As Harper touched my lips I had no idea what to do or to say. When she noticed I didn't kiss her back she leaned back and said nothing.
We sat in an awkward silence until she stood up, and she opened the door as quick as she closed the door.

I sat now alone on my couch and felt nothing. I was surprised that she tried to kiss me, but I was definitely not ready for making out with someone else than Maddison. Maybe it was also the fact that Harper was drunk, and she had no idea what she was doing.

I just wanted to drink some wine I didn't think it would escalate, I thought it was a good idea to ask Harper to stay to have some company and get distracted, but the weird thing is that I really liked Harper's company and her beautiful green eyes that looked at me with worry. I can't forget her laugh when she laughed with me, it felt so natural.

Madi never laughed that much, she cried a lot and honestly I think I was the only reason she cried.
We had not the same humor and sometimes I had to explain my jokes to her, but she was hilarious and made me laugh a lot even if I was sad.

I still heard Madi in my head saying that we're not working together anymore. She took my heart with her when she left my apartment, and she didn't even know.

She was my first love, I met her in Ireland when I was there after the boys, and I went on hiatus.
After being friends for a while I asked her on a date, and then we became more.

We had a great time together, but when I'm thinking about it now it doesn't seem like it to me that she was always happy with me and I don't even know why.

I really loved her, but maybe she did not love me as much as I loved her.
She always hated my job, that I was not home all the time, the paparazzi that followed us everywhere and when I say everywhere I mean everywhere, they even followed us on our first date.

The Press always talked shit about her and me and made her really uncomfortable. Even on social media she received hate.

When I dealt sometimes with panic attacks she couldn't handle them and I'm not mad at her because I can't see people having a panic attack either.
We had always a hard path, but I thought we got better in our relationship, but I think she proofed me wrong.

It was 3:45am I was laying in my bed and I tried to sleep, but couldn't sleep after this day. There were too many thoughts in my head.

I had to calm me down, so I stood up and did what I could do the best to calm me down. Playing guitar, piano and writing a song.

I played a bit on the guitar, but then I sat on my piano and played the first thing I had in mind. First I sang a random melody, but after a time I had lyrics in my head that reminded me of Madi.

"Are you all dressed up but with nowhere to go
Are your tears falling down when the lights are low
Another Friday night tryna put on a show
Do you hate the weekend
'Cause nobody's calling
I've still got so much love hidden beneath this skin.."

I finished the song crying at 5am and then went to bed again and tried to sleep, but Every time I closed my eyes the day repeated in my head.

I woke up at 7am and decided to go for a run to clear my head and get fresh air. I run past my favorite Park and I felt people were looking at me.

I wondered if they already knew about my break up with Madi or if they were just looking because of me. I felt like I saw her everywhere, everywhere I was looking at I saw Madi's face.

I ran past people that were sitting on the grass, kissing, laughing, looking like they were all in love and having fun.
I was standing now on the bridge Madi and I had our first kiss. It felt like it was yesterday, we had so much fun on our first date. We had a picnic in the Park, had a few laughs, and we walked over the bridge while the moonlight was shining at us.

It was just a magical moment and then I kissed her and I felt I was in love for the first time, what was probably true because I had never someone serious in my life, as I looked up from the Bridge I saw Harper miles away running in my direction. When she was almost in my near she saw me and her face had an expression of guilt in it.
I walked a bit closer to her, and she did the same.