The Help

Chapter 5.

"Alas, and did my Savior bleed

And did my Sovereign die?

Would He devote that sacred head

For such a worm as I?”

 
The empty casket mocked her and robbed her of any chance to make peace with what had happened. Hymns were sung by the choir and the pastor spoke about how grateful Hana was, how indebted she felt to the Johnsons. Bilah’s mind was filled with horrible, hateful thoughts. Indebted? They killed her. How dare they stand there and mourn along with the rest of them, she thought. Mrs. Johnson was present, a smug look on her face, not an iota of sadness in her heart. She could care less. To her, the death of Hana was as insignificant as dusting dirt off her dress. It meant a reduced amount of money spent, less mouths to feedand less wages paid. 

The arms of her mother comforted her the whole time. Everyone understood what they were going through, knowing how close their families were. When Bilah told Hana’s mother the truth, what prompted her to leave in the first place, she wept. Now, she did the same—the heartbreak clear as day on her face. 

Thoughts of what she could have done for her constantly crossed Bilah’s mind. She felt as though she’d failed her best friend. At the time she was needed the most. The more she thought about it, the more she understood that Hana had no choice. She’d have done the exact same thing. During that time, the overwhelming need for escape Bilah felt everyday must have come over Hana. The need to break out of the cage that held them. 

Mrs. Johnson cleared her throat. “This has been a difficult day for many of you. We respect and understand your pain but unfortunately, we have a plantation to run and time cannot be wasted. You’ll all have to get back to work immediately.”

Silence fell over the room. A pin could have been dropped and  everyone would have heard it. Bilah shared incredulous looks with everyone in the room, shocked to hear what had just been said. 

“Well, honey, maybe we could give them the day off. I mean a girl just died.”

Mrs Johnson just scoffed. “And I just said, we have a plantation to run. I won’t have any of it, Richard. We don’t pay them to sit around and mope.”

If not for the fact that Hana would not want to be remembered alongside an altercation, nothing would have stopped Bilah from slapping the woman across the face. Instead, she stood there, tight-lipped, and said nothing. 

“Change and get back to work. We have a long day ahead of us.I can’t have my first son coming back to see little yield from the harvest.”

The walk home was utterly depressing. People walked heavily, distraught to have lost a member of their community. Someone dying felt like losing a loved one. They all had so little but supported themselves through thick and thin. 

Bilah felt numb all over. Her body, her mind and her soul. Her heart broke a million times over, her sadness a dark abyss she was continuously being dragged into. Weary and sympathetic eyes had followed her all day. She hated it, mostly because she wasn’t the one dead. 

By the time the plantation was filled with workers, the time of mourning had passed. They loved Hana but were careful not to end up in the same situation. Bilah worked tiredly all afternoon, her energy completely drained. When she felt a pair of eyes on her, she looked up. This time, however, they weren’t filled with pity or concern but steely determination. The man kept staring at her, his eyes a beautiful shade of brown. 

He gestured with his head for her move to his part of the field and surprisingly, she agreed. 

With his voice dropped to a whisper, he asked: “Do you want to see Hana?”

She couldn’t believe what she had just heard. Couldn’t tell if he was being serious. 

“What you mean?” she asked. 

“I mean, Hana is alive. You gon’ see her or what?”

“Where is she? How she doing?” she asked once again. 

The look the man gave her told her to shut up. “Don’t go shouting! Hell, the whole world be hearing you. We can’t talk here, else people gon’ hear and she gon’ be in bigger trouble. Meet me behind the barn once the sun sets. I gon’ wait for a while and that’s it. After that, I leaving.”

“I gon’ be there. Don’t worry.”

“Good. Now go on, don’t want no gossip about you talking to some man.”

She walked away, feeling considerably lighter. Her work was finished in record time and she walked home quickly. For the next few hours, she could barely contain her excitement. Her mother found it suspicious, asking her why she finished and came home so early. The only response she could give was a shrug. 

A dark reddish pink tint coloured the sky, so she took it as her cue to get going. Her decision to be early stemmed from the fact that this was her last chance to see her friend and she was not going to mess up. The man arrived a few minutes after her. They had started to talk when they heard a loud cough behind them. 

Old Jimmy stood there, a look of disapproval on his face. The position they stood in appeared scandalous, as they needed to whisper and in order to do that their heads had to be close to the other. 

“What you doing here, girl? This the second time I caught you here! With a man!”

“Old Jimmy, it ain’t---”. She was cut off almost immediately. 

“It ain’t like what? After all yo’ mama did for you? You down here with some man.”

“Old Jimm—”

“I gon let you off just this once! Yo’ friend death and all that! Don’t want to see you here no more!”

“Of course!”

Oh Jimmy, if only you knew, she thought.

 
***************************************************************
“Oh my god, Hana!”

“Bilah? Bilah?”. Tears formed in both their eyes. “What you doing here girl?”

“What you mean ‘what I doing here? ’What I supposed to do? When you be off disappearing like that. What happened?”

Hana smiled, clearly missing her friend. “Well, the night you left, some men come to Baker. They say they gon’ free me and take me to Pennsylvania. They done stop they slavery. I good.”

“Oh, Hana. You been through so much. Yo’ mama miss you a lot.”

“I miss her too,” Hana said, the tears forming again in her eyes. “You got to tell her that I’m alive. That I love her. So much. I never woulda left if I wasn’t in trouble.”

“I gon’ do that. No worries.” Hana smiled at her. Just then, an older man came into the room and informed us that it was time for Hana to move. The two girls embraced themselves, desperate to hang onto this moment forever.

“I gon’ miss you girl. More than anything,” Bilah said.

“I gon miss you too. I love you.”

“Take care of yo’ self. Write as much as you can.”

“I will.”

They stared into each other’s eyes for one final moment. Probably the last time they’d see themselves.

“Bye!”

“Bye, girl.”

A/N: OK so Hana isn't dead. But then we'll probably never see her again. Not sure what's worse🤔. Hope you guys enjoy the chapter. I had fun writing it.