Tylers POV
“They’re dead”
Dead? How can they be dead? My sister isn’t dead! My sister can’t be dead! No, no, no, no not that little girl that would take the last ice-block or I would help with homework. Not that teenage girl that would keep secrets from me but then come to me for boy advice.
“What?” I say, confused. “That has to be a joke! Right?” I look around the room for some sort of condolence.
“Tyler…” Troye whispers, slowly shaking his head. “I am so so sorry.” He comes over and holds me in his arms tightly.
And just like that lying in his arms, I released it true. And a tsunami of tragic emotions fell down upon me. It was an indescribable pain. My adorable little sister was dead. Like a candle, she burned out. It just couldn’t be. She has to keep burning. SHE SHOULD’VE HADMORETIME, more time. She shouldn’t have – she didn’t deserve – to be extinguished. And then here come the sobs, heartfelt, body wrecking things that come out like a drastic cry for help. One after the other they flow, like a hurricane from my eyes. Troye just stays there, slowly kissing my neck and rubbing my back in a comforting fashion. Than hurt I felt was tremendous. Imagine your heart being wrenched from your body. Or worse yet, your first love breaking up with you and your best friend that you now have become strangers with and that time you failed the most important test mixed in with 3 of your worst memories multiplied by being turned down twice. Maybe that’s a moderate fractions of it. You never expect the ones you love to just, die. You expect them to live with you, stay with. The human mind placing you in such denial death is unfathomable if you love the person. It just shows how wrong your thoughts can be.
“She didn’t want to tell you” Zoe mutters with struggle. I barely look up to acknowledge her.
“Tell him what?” Troye asks, communicating for me.
“That she…” She says, dejectedly. “That she was pregnant.”
“What?” Troye asks. I barely shrug a shoulder at this news, nothing will ever compare to the burden on me.
“We did sort of assume...” Troye continues. I give a slight nod of affirmation at this.
“Listen guys” Troye murmurs. “I’m Tyler to bed, Alf you should take Zoe as well okay?” I see Troye pull Alfie to the side.
“Okay man, we have to be strong for them. We can mourn in our own time, but imagine the pain they’re going through, yeah we’re the ones they rely on” He whispers then turns to me and speaker, louder however. “Come on ty” He lifts me up carefully. “Let’s get you to bed.”
As he carries me I feel sick. My t-shirt covered with salty tears and my face stained. The sobs haven’t subsided, just gotten quieter. As he lays me down, he softly sings Lullabies by All Time Low, wraps his arms around me and sings me to sleep.
*3 Days Later*
Today is the day of their funeral. Zoe, Alfie, Troye and I all sit –gloomily in black- near the front, close to the two caskets. Behind us, our families, and behind them, the rest of our group. Many other people have arrived, including people from school turned up to mourn. I tune out most of it, trying to keep myself together. I focus on Troye’s hand attached to mine. His soft thumb circling small motions on the top of my hand. Soon enough it’s my turn – to go up and speak I mean. Shakily I stand up and walk towards the podium, feeling everyone’s sympathetic eyes on me.
“Ella and Joe were a couple no one could forget. They were happy, carefree and most importantly in love. Through their humour, idiotic smart wit and kindness they made the world a better place.” I started with the typical bullshit everyone expects a funeral, to make themselves feel better I think.
“But more importantly than that” I continue, my voice growing louder and stronger. “They were loved, they are loved. Look besides you, these are your loved ones. You expect them to live with you for your entire life. Our never expect that on a day like this, the fates could change and you could end up stranded with a gaping hole in your heart. I expected my little sister to see my wedding day, I expected to see her walk down the aisle in a pretty white dress and a genuine smile etched upon her face. I always expected her to be standing here, old and grey reading at my funeral. Know I know it’s stupid to dream of the future while we stand here and their caskets are right there but the futures all we got. Ella and Joe were so happy for the time they had here and we, the ones gathered here today, were most and utterly grateful for them. But we still took every day for granted. The future is just so precious. We can’t expect a thing without it. You’re always thinking of the future. Always. What you’re going to have for dinner tonight is the future. We just always visioned ours with them. But now we don’t have them!” I feel the tears started to stack up in my eyes, but I plough on. “So now we have to change it, isn’t of dreaming we have to remember, remember what it was like with them, remember what it could have been. We will never forget them. I will always have my little sister. She’s never going to leave my side. And Zoë” She looks up at me, wide eyes and a sad thing f a smile “Joe is never going to leave yours. He’s always going to tell you when you look bad and embarrass you in front of our friends and tell you look beautiful and threaten Alfie to death if he hurts you.
So know they’re physical forms have departed. We still love them, we won’t stop loving them but now we have to increase our love. Spread our love to everyone around us. “I look directly at Troye with loving eyes and a delicate smile. “Treat each day as if it’s your last. Dance in the rain, sing in the shower, and kiss the one you love till you need air. We need to continue each day as we were; glad to have it. But now we just have to be more careful with our time. The fates aren’t going to help us – Ella and Joe were pregnant together for Jesus’ sake! – Something like this could happen to anyone of us, even our most treasured. Do not ignore the chance to scream, smile or laugh. To dance or sing or act. To kiss or hug or play. To climb or to fly. To decorate, to dress up. Do not ignore the chance to love. Do not forget. Ella and Joe were loved, are loved and will continue to be loved.” And with that I took a last shaky breath and stepped off the podium. As I walked back people no longer looked at me with sympathy but now with awe and newfound ideas. I gently sat down and Troye wrapped his arm around my waist.
“That was seriously beautiful Ty” He whispered lovingly.
“Thanks, every word, I really did mean” I reply in the same tone. After a moment he says
“I will always love you. If we join Joe and Ella tomorrow I will love you furiously till then, whether its next week or next month or in 70 years, I will love you with so much passion till then. Tyler Oakley my future is with you. I know it. I love you, and I mean it in the full extent of those words. I Fucking Love You”
“I love you too Troye, and I mean that. I love you and I will not stop loving you. Since the day I found you in the park till now my love for you has grown and it will continue to grow till it can grow no more and then some. I Love You”
__________________________________- Authors Note-____________________________
Heeeeellllllllllloooooooooo
This has been an absolutely fabulous adventure.
This story is one of my highest achievement s ever.
Do not fret! There is more in the works! Two stories coming I have for you beauties.
Thankyou so much for reading my story! I legit love all of you.
Please enjoy your futures and I’ll see you then! *cue the tears* *I’m sorry I’m crying rn*
With eternal love, and for the final time in Darling You’ll be Okay.
Baiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii – Caitie xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxxooxoxxox
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Darling You'll Be Okay -A Troyler Fanfiction
Fanfiction*-* Warning: May Be Triggering *-* - Troyler Alternative Universe Troye is spiralling down into that dark chasm until one day, he might do something irreversible. Can a certain pastel haired boy save him from his own destruction? - May Contain Trac...
