A train to life...

16

Sidharth felt restless after coming back from theatre. He wandered around his room while biting his nails. This was something new for him, completely new. Of course, he had felt attracted towards certain women, but this one was different. It was something which was beyond his control. As the days were passing, he was getting more and more curious about her. He just wanted to know everything about her, everything! and didn't wanted to share her with anyone.

He sat on the chair and took the whiskey bottle in his hand. Pouring some of it into the glass, he took it near his chest. Leaving a sigh, he took a gulp of the liquor. Sitting there for an hour and having a half bottle of whiskey didn't helped him much. Rather it worsened his pain. He wanted her badly. May she could be his heal. With a half closed eyes he searched for his phone around. Seeing it lying on the bed, he walked over to there after placing the glass on the table. Taking the phone in his hand, he lied on the bed with a smile.

Ooh my sweetie!

He whispered in a drunken voice and searched for her name in his phone. Finding her name, he grinned widely and dialed her number.

...

Shehnaaz was in deep sleep, when she got disturbed by the call. Her eyes opened widely seeing the the called id.

Sidharth!! iss time pe??

She got up from the bed in a jerk and attended the call.

Hello..Sidharth?? kya hua??

She asked in panic.

Haa...meim...meim hu...Why did you left me ?? Why mamma??

He was completely lost in alcohol by now.

She narrowed her eyes and looked at the caller id again. She was shocked to see that it was really him itself. 

Mammaa.... Why didn't you wait for me mammaa... I didn't knew! I didn't knew anything.... Why didn't you stopped me that day?? if....if you had.... I know, I am really bad..really.....

There were no more words from his side. after waiting for a minute, she wispered.

Sidharth?? Are you there?

Without getting any reply back, she assumed that he must be asleep. She had no clue, why her eyes were becoming teary. Her heart ached feeling the pain in his voice. She never in her dreams thought that he had so much of pain inside him. But the reason was still unknown to her. One thing was sure, He miss his mother so much and he feel guilty for something. The rest of the night was a sleepless one for her, on the other hand the reason of her sleepless night, slept on his bed still having the phone near to his ear.

.......

The next morning Sidharth opened his eyes, while holding his head with one hand.

AAh!! Sidharth! What did you do last night??

He scolded himself as he remembered nothing from last night. Seeing the condition of the room and almost empty wiskey bottle, He could guess what happened last night. He shook his head and walked towards the washroom to fresh up.

He directly went under the shower and turned on the tap. The cold water flew over his body. He closed his eyes and tears flew down along with the water. He couldn't go back to the past and correct his mistakes. Only he could do was to feel guilty for the rest of the life. He was not there for her, when she needed him the most. He was in the path that shown by his father. Completely lost in himself. And the rest of the life he was trying to be lost in himself, on which he was failing miserably. 

You are not this Sid!!

His heart mocked him many times. But, he didn't wanted to hear that. He didn't deserved a peaceful life. It is his punishment for leaving her alone.