LikeBrary (KhaiThird)

A Letter For Khai

Ai khuwai,

You know what? You are the most dumbest person alive in this entire earth. No, not earth. Entire universe. Calling you dumb will be an insult to a real dumb person. You are lower than that.

Sometimes, I feel like you are not only dumb but also blind. Mentally blind. You can never understand what the fuck is happening in your surroundings. You always act so cool, so understanding about everything yet you are always oblivious about me. You can see everything then why can't you see me? I am here, I am always here standing right beside you. Everyone can see it but not you.

You know, it's been 3 years. 3 fucking years. Yet, I am still here, stuck with a dumbass like you. I have always felt so guilty and the feeling I have for you, slowly kills me inside every time I see you with someone else who is not me. I feel so stupid waiting for you every time at the same place when I know that you will never come. And as always, I go home getting hurt because you ditch me for some random girl. Do I mean nothing to you?

Am I this mere to you than some random chick? Remember, you ditched me and lied to me that you are going out to have dinner with your family because you wanted to watch a movie with your girlfriend? I felt awful when I saw you outside the movie theater. I felt so empty, my heart shattered into millions of pieces when I realise I trusted you and your lies like blind, I even fought with others as they told me that you lied to me. I didn't believe them when they told me you that you ditched me. But in the end, I am still the biggest fool who is still in love with you.

You know, I tried to confess to you. I gathered up my all remaining courage just to confess to you. I thought, maybe there is a 0.0001% chance that you may consider me and think about us. I never dreamt about us being together but at the same time I want to be only with you. Maybe, I am the dumb one here. I watched uncountable romantic movies to think about how should I confess to you, how should I make our moment special. I was so excited. I was awake the whole night before confessing to you. But I forgot, you are an idiot. You didn't even understand that I was confessing to you. Did you even see the shine in my eyes after confessing to you? You just stood there like a stupid and thought I was trying to help you get back with your ex.

Maybe, I shouldn't blame you. You never thought me more than a friend. You can never even imagine it in you wildest dreams that I like you. I should have never expected something from you.

I am sorry. I am sorry my dear friend. I am sorry for loving you. It is my fault that I fell in love with you and expected to get loved back when you just think of me as your friend and nothing more than that. I am sorry my friend, my love, my world for thinking about our future together.

I hate you. No, actually I hate myself. I hate myself for loving you when I always get hurt whenever I am with you. I guess, I shouldn't have confessed to you and suppressed this stupid feelings till the very end. I hope these feelings will fade away for forever. I am sorry my dear friend. I can't afford to lose you as a friend even if I kill myself inside for the feelings I feel for you.

Your loving friend,

3

Ps. I wish, I could give my half brain to you. Because brains are not sold in markets.

A/N : ''Khuwai'' means idiot in Thai. I am actually not sure if it's right or not. 😅 I heard this word in Theory of love's ep 9 as Two called Khai an idiot in hospital after he said that he kissed Third while he was asleep. Correct me if I am wrong. 💚