We have all heard that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. This phrase is meant to illustrate the subjective nature of beauty. Beauty is subjective, but I think we can all agree that it should describe something good. A better line would be, beauty is in the heart of the beholder. The word beautiful should be used in the context of beauty as an experience. It should refer to something not just seen, but also felt. Webster’s defines the word as, “Any of those attributes of form, sound, color, execution, character, behavior, etcetera which give pleasure and gratification to the senses or to the mind (“Beauty”). That is my favorite definition, because it entails more than just sight. It allows for more of the experience I am talking about. You feel beauty. Ideally, the word should involve the senses and the mind.
Beautiful applies best as a combination of feelings. What is more beautiful, a picture of a sunset or that same sunset experienced? Obviously the experienced sunset. What makes the sunset enjoyable? If you have been out in the sun all day, you would appreciate the cooling temperature. Maybe you had a productive day. The sunset would feel almost like a reward. Maybe you are sharing it with someone you love. All of these feelings would combine to enrich the experience. It would be beautiful for many reasons. You could alter the circumstances of that example. You could be alone and experience that same sunset, and it could be beautiful. There would just be a different combination of feelings involved. Maybe you had an uneventful day, and you’d been feeling down. The simple visual stimulation of the sunset could lead to feelings of nostalgia. You might find yourself remembering pleasant memories, which could lead to a feeling of comfort. In that moment perhaps you have a realization, that no matter how bad it gets, feelings of peace always seem to return. This could make you more hopeful for the future. All this could combine to having a feeling of serenity. This is how beauty works.
People can be beautiful. Physical appearance can be a part of that. That is something that is subjective. I think we should try to reserve beautiful for people we personally know. If we don’t know the person, we are simply basing our opinion and feelings on their looks. Our feelings are stronger and clearer if we know the person. An example would be a daughter. Say it’s her wedding day, and she is walking down the aisle, smiling warmly. Her father (or mother) would obviously find her beautiful in that moment. Part of the reasoning would be the presentation. Brides tend to fuss over their hair, their dress, makeup, and whatever else. It’s a special day, and they want to look their best. There is nothing wrong with that. Maybe the bride is a pig-nosed troll. Maybe she is very attractive. This is a subjective thing. What makes her beautiful is partly the love the father has for her. He knows her qualities. He sees the best in her. He is happy for her. He sees her happiness. The event is probably surreal to them both. He probably can’t help but remember her as a little girl. There is something special about these moments, where time comes together. We see a deeper meaning, a bigger picture. The father doesn’t need all these circumstances to find his daughter beautiful, but sometimes we take beauty for granted. Special occasions can remind us, they can also emphasize that beauty. You can’t argue the use of beautiful there. The bride is beautiful in that moment. The occasion is beautiful. Compare that to the use of beautiful for someone you don’t know, maybe an anonymous half-naked model. Maybe you see her at a photo shoot. She might be the most attractive woman you’ve ever seen. Maybe she could be considered beautiful by some. Maybe her boyfriend finds her beautiful, but it would be for more than just her looks. There would have to be more feeling involved. Not knowing her yourself, your feelings would not be well based. Maybe you would develop a crush. Attractive people do make us feel certain ways. There could be feelings involved, but they would be based on a visual bias alone. You would just be projecting qualities onto the model that she may or may not have. We see an attractive girl and we want to like them. We want them to be likeable, so we imagine they are interesting or kind. Maybe they are not though.
As it is, beautiful is too often used in regards to appearance. This can have a very negative effect. “At its worst, beauty discriminates. Studies suggest attractive people make more money, get called on more often in class, receive lighter court sentences, and are perceived as friendlier. We do judge a book by its cover” (Newman). It’s easy to see that this isn’t fair. It’s easy to see how this fact could make people angry. It could justifiably be considered a handicap to be born “ugly”. The way we view others and ourselves can affect our psychology. It must be hard for “ugly” people to realize they are not the image of “beauty”. They see that looks do matter. This can obviously cause pain, and with that comes anger. Being viewed as “ugly” can affect a person’s self-esteem. Confidence is one of the most important things to have in life. It is an attractive quality in itself. Insecurity and anger are not attractive characteristics. As you can see, it can really be an uphill battle for people born “ugly”.
Beauty should not discriminate. That’s why the word beautiful should not be used lightly. Using it casually, or incorrectly, cheapens it. The definition that I like, includes many attributes aside from physical attraction. This allows for it to be used as a unique description of something or someone. There are similar words, like divine or lovely. Divine has religious connotations though. Divine also sounds snooty to me. Lovely has love connotations. Lovely is also used sarcastically a lot these days. The Victoria’s Secret model may be considered beautiful, but isn’t sexy a better word for her? Cute, pretty, and handsome can be used for basic descriptions of physical appearance. Scenic can be used for a post card of a waterfall. Using more consideration for how we define words, might make us more considerate of our values too.
