Happiness is a Warm Gun | AaronHotchnerxReader

I

Chapter One - Mr Grumpy

You stood at the rear of the Lecture Theatre with your back against the wall, smiling slightly as you looked down at the group of guest lecturers who were wrapping up their presentation. It had been a very interesting lecture, holding the attention of the students much better then you ever could, but you supposed the topics covered were slightly different. Serial killers, differential equations. Potato, potatoe.

As the lecture ended the students started to file out through the door next to you, some barely acknowledging you as you leant with your foot up against the wall and your arms folded across your chest. A few of the bolder boys looked you up and down slightly, but you were used to that by now. If there was one thing that was always certain, it was that college kids were horny motherfuckers.

As the room emptied the guest lecturers at the bottom started to clump together, smiling as they spoke. Ceasing the opportunity as it was just them and Professor Chinakoe left in the theatre, you made your way down the steps and called out as you casually descended to the stage.

'Well if it isn't FBI Technical Analyst and general hot-stuff Penelope Garcia!' You called as she turned to look at you, her brief surprise at seeing you quickly giving way to a massive smile as she bounded towards you as quickly as she could in her kitten heels which clicked against the wooden floor as she moved.

'Y/N!' She called, wrapping you in a tight hug. Pulling away, she smiled at you with her signature cat-eye glasses balanced on the end of her nose.'You came!'

'Of course I came- I couldn't miss you giving your big speech Professor Garcia!' You smiled at her as she shied away slightly- you knew she hated speaking publicly but you had convinced her she could do it when she had rang a couple of weeks prior to tell you her team had been asked to speak at your College. 'You were amazing by the way.' You spoke kindly as she blushed slightly, pulling away from you a bit so you could see her team behind her.

'Thankyou sugar!' She said jokingly, however you knew her well enough to know that what you said had meant a lot to her. Turning around to draw the attention of her team, she spoke with her signature bounce. 'Guys, this is Y/N. She's a Professor here.
Y/N, this is...'

'Wait, let me guess.' You interrupt her, walking further onto the stage with her so that you were standing across from her team. Looking at them one by one, you put descriptions to faces. Indicating the youngest man, you smiled at him. 'You must be the kid-genius.' He nodded and you just smiled back, not attempting to shake his hand as you remembered he didn't like that. 'Nice to meet you Doctor.' You said to him before looking to a petite lady with long blonde hair and a welcoming smile. 'You're super-mum.' You smiled as you took her hand, her laughing at Garcia as she appreciated the nickname. Turning to the only other woman who had dark bobbed hair, you take her hand too. 'You're the resident bad-ass.'

'That I am.' She laughed as she shook your hand.

'Ah.' You laughed as you turned to a tall black man with a very pretty face and a slightly cocky grin who was subtly checking you out. 'Chocolate Thunder indeed.' You said as you took his hand and he laughed.

'What's my Baby-Girl been saying about me?'

'Oh only bad things I assure you.' You replied as he laughed, Garcia immediately denying it. 'I only have good things to say about my boy.' She scorned you jokingly as you turned to the next team member, one of the most Italian-American looking people you had ever seen.

'Italian Stallion?' You inquired as you took his hand, his grip firm as he smiled and nodded in response.

'I thought I was the pasta-king?' He asked Garcia who looked more timid than usual- he was her superior, you remembered, and she was probably less comfortable joking around him.

'Oh you're both. I'm just a big Rocky fan.' You regained his attention as he laughed heartily, the team nodding along and agreeing with his nicknames. 'I'm a big fan by the way. It's always easier to get a good, quiet nights sleep after reading a couple of chapters about cannibals murdering young women in the night to use their toes for garnish.'

'Hmm I'm not sure I remember that case.' He replied chuckling as the team laughed.

'And that must make you the boss-man.' You said to the last team-member, taking his hand as you looked him over with slightly more attention than you paid the others, him apparently doing the same. Turning to Garcia, you grinned cheekily. 'Now you told me about the playboy bunny but you never said that Mr Grumpy was cute.' You half-joked, indicating between the Agents you knew as Morgan and Hotch, the latter who was blushing slightly uncharacteristically according to what you'd heard.

Choosing to just glance at you with a slight smirk before turning to Penelope, Hotch spoke with a low baritone. 'Mr Grumpy?'

'Sir, I didn't...' Penelope tried to reply only to be cut off by Rossi.

'I thought he was Jack Frost?' Rossi the famous author interrupted, a genuine questioning tone in his voice.

'Ooh I like that one.' The young blonde, JJ, laughed as the other woman, Emily, nodded along. Hotch fained annoyance to cover a chuckle.

'Professor Y/L/N. I didn't realise you knew our guests?' A voice called from behind as Professor Chinakoe approached you with an extended hand, placing the other on your upper arm affectionately as he shook your hand. You had known eachother for a long time now and whilst your relationship remained strictly professional you had always gotten on well.

'Me and Miss Quantico here went to CalTech together.' You spoke kindly as you indicated to Penelope with a nod of your head.

'Oh wow how interesting.' He replied with a smile before turning to Rossi, slightly nervous to address the group as a whole. 'Once again, thankyou so much for coming down.'

'Of course Professor.' He replied warmly as the team moved slightly to pick up their notes from their respective lecture rheas.

'Now I hate to rush off but I have a meeting to get to. I'm sure Professor Y/L/N here will show you out.' He spoke with a slight question in his voice as you nodded at him kindly. Everyone knew that Professor Chinakoe was one of the busiest lecturers and regularly took on more than he could chew so you were happy to help. 'And thankyou to all of you once again.' He spoke kindly before rushing off. Knowing him, each team member would be getting a thousand-word email thanking them for coming down the next morning.

'So what're you guys planning on doing for the rest of the day?' You addressed the group as you were left alone in the room.

'Not much.' Emily replied honestly. It was already quite late in fairness, just approaching four, but something told you that you wanted to get to know Penelope's team better... or one team member in particular who hadn't seemed to take his eyes off you the entire time you were talking to Professor Chinakoe. Not that you minded.

'Well I know a bar nearby if you fancy?' You addressed the group as they let out a general acknowledgment of agreement, Penelope grabbing your arm with a huge smile on her face. Showing them the way out, you walked to the car park where two back SUVs were parked next to your car. Agreeing to follow you there, Hotch and Emily drove behind you with the other team members as Penelope caught a lift with you.

'So you think Hotch is cute?' Penelope asked through a giggle as you drove.

'Oh honey come on, you know he's just my type.' You smiled back as you responded, taking your eyes off the road briefly to catch her eyeline. Having a thing for the talk, dark and handsome FBI boss Mr Darcy-type. Oh how very clique.

Hey! Hope you enjoyed the first chapter and any votes and comments are much appreciated! I have also made a Spotify Playlist inspired by our fave FBI SSA dilf, check out 'Aaron Hotchner' by madipscott if you're interested (very inventive name I know). See you in the next chapter!