For my first day of school I chose my favourite pair of dark wash jeans and paired it with my grey Ed hardy V-neck singlet and finished it off with my black fake leather jacket. I never wore real leather even the thought of wearing animal skin made my skin crawl.
Yuck!
"Come on stop hogging the bathroom!" Belle banged on the door repeatedly unfortunately we shared a bathroom as well as a bedroom; it was torture. What I imagined hell to be like although I think I'd rather be tortured by Satan if I had the option.
"Just wait a minute will you?" I finished applying the last layer of black mascara and eye liner. It was bold but not over the top. It was just perfect and made my blue eyes stand out against my dark hair.
"I've been waiting for half an hour!" Belle snapped and banged on the door one last time like it would make me rush when in fact it had the opposite effect.
Silly girl! It was like she didn't know me at all.
"You are such a brat." I spat back before I applied my vanilla scented lip gloss. My look was now complete. Derek would be impressed for sure not that all the fuss was just for Derek although I did want him to see me at my best.
"There you go your majesty." I opened the door and bowed before she pushed past me and slammed the door closed. I couldn't help but laugh. She was such a drama queen and I wondered if I was the same when I was ten years old.
"Must you tease your sister like that?" I heard my mother yell from the kitchen and I ignored her as I walked across the hall into my shared room and packed my writing books and writing utensils into my black shoulder bag. I was ready to go but I still had to wait for Belle so I decided to play some music to help pass the time.
I tuned into the radio and Blink 182- Stay together for the kids played through the speakers and my heart sank. My wounds were still fresh but they had finally stopped bleeding and started to scab over. Yet the lyrics had ripped them open, it had robbed me of my progress and I jumped to my feet and quickly shut off my iPod dock.
Focus just focus. I guided myself as I closed my eyes.
I'm strong; stronger than most of the people I know. I'm going to be fine. I'm going to be better than fine. I coached myself as I took deep breaths in and exhaled.
"What are you doing?" Belle asked and I opened my eyes. She was standing in the door way dressed and ready to go with her strawberry blonde hair separated into two plats, and I let out a sigh of relief.
"Nothing," How long had my eyes been closed for? Belle always had half an hour showers at least it seemed to run in the family. We were lucky our hot water also seemed to last forever.
Thank god.
"Well come on than we don't want to be late for our first day." Belle prompted me and I made sure not to show how grateful I was to be free from my thoughts.
I wasn't nervous or worried about starting over at a new school but I did miss my old friends and my father... A lot but I had a feeling Derek was going to be able to distract my thoughts, and I hoped he was going to be in a couple of my classes at the very least.
I imagined him as the mischievous bad boy with many female admirers and the thought practically extinguished the smile that had risen to my lips. Why would he pick me? I was already imagining all the competition that would be more beautiful than I was.
Oh come on don't go getting all insecure now. My inner voice instructed me and I listened besides I was getting worked up for no reason he probably had a girlfriend anyway; it's not like we talked that much.