[a/n: there are probably some major triggers in the beginning of the chapter. Please don't read if you are triggered easily. But then again I probably should have put warnings in most of my other chapters too….Mentions of: Pills, self hate, attempted suicide, mental illness ect. (probably...)]
“Shit…” you sigh. You splash your face a few more times and look back up to see your reflection. But it wasn't just you in the mirror. She was there too.
“No no no no no no no no no no no no!” you silently chant to yourself grabbing the sides of your head, “You're not real!”
“How long do you think you're going to keep running Y/n?” she taunts with a sick smile twisted on her face. But it was your face. You hadn’t seen your ‘other’ you in almost a month… things were going well up until now.
“How bad do you think you just hurt him?” she spits. You turn around to face her. As you turn around her face is only centimeters away from yours. “You know that he doesn't need you..the only reason he’s still here is because he pities you.” she snarls. You know it's not real… You know that; yet, it seems so real. You can feel her warmth and you can feel her messy hair touch you as she closes in.
“N-no! I-... He doesn't-” you start, but she interrupts.
“He what!? He needs you to, right? Don't lie to yourself! Look at you,” she backs away and gestured with her hands, “your hideous. You don't actually think he likes you right? He’s lying to you. Everyone is always lying to you. You don't deserve his help...you don't deserve any kindness,” her words hit you like bullets.
“No…” you can feel the tears swelling up in your eyes. You lower yourself to the ground, and cover your ears. But you can still hear her perfectly. Her voice cuts through your mind like a razor.
“You worthless piece of shit. You do this for attention right? You like the situation you're in, right!?” you shake your head at her words.
“NO! You're wrong! I didn't mean to!” she gets down to your level and makes you face her, by grabbing your chin and pulling it up.
“Your mother should have killed you at any chance she had. You should've killed yourself. You garbage. You're a worthless piece of trash that gets in the way. nobody would ever love you.” her words are venom, as tears roll down your face. You open your mouth to say something but nothing comes out, “You just a nobody… you are nothing but a burden. Go slice up your arms again. Maybe try something new, yeah?” she looked over to the cabinet. And looks back at you with an evil smile. “Open the cabinet.”
“No…” you cry, trembling in fear, “please no…” you whimper. She helps you up and slowly runs her finger tips alon your arm, from your shoulder to your wrist.
“Shhhh...it ok,” she mockingly soothes, “It won't hurt,” she guides your hand to the cabinet door, and you end up opening it. You see all the pill bottles that are lined up on the small and shelves.
“I don't want to!” you whimper out in a sob. “You little bitch. Do you have any idea how much pain you have caused? Do you have any clue how many people want you gone!? You being selfish. Do it! Do it! Do it!” she hisses out at you. Your shaky hand reaches for the first bottle, popping it open and poring the pills into your palm.
“They all want you gone, nobody loves you, they’re better off without you! You ruined their lives!” she screams. Her voice rings in your ears as you can't make it go away.
“Jin….” you softly whimper, “I promised Jin that-”
“Do you actually think he cares? You idiot. He feels bad for you. You’re holding him back!” and with that; you put the pills in your mouth and start running the faucet, catching the water and using it to down the pills easier. You sob as you reach for the next bottle and pop it open, letting the empty one hit the floor with a hollow thud, as you repeat your last action. You swallow mre pills, then some more, and more, and more, while sobbing as the other you continues to tell you hateful and awful things, until you hear a knock on the door.
YOU ARE READING
Broken To Fixed Kiri X Reader(fem)
FanfictionY/n is a student at UA, and shes a good one. She's smart, kind, and practically a model student. She doesnt have a friend group, she likes to do her own thing, but she's so sweet and helpful when people come to her. She has crush on Kirishima but sh...
