Chapter 12

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There was a strange quality to conversations at night that went beyond explanation or description and made everything feel slightly dreamlike. When Frankie fell into bed with Mollie, crawling up the pillows and smiling, that sensation flowed in her veins and brought her heartbeat to a gentle lull. She wasn’t sure whether it was her own tiredness or the simple fact that she felt so incredibly comfortable beside her best friend, but she suddenly felt like she could say anything and everything in that moment. Her head tipped to the side to look at Mollie, and she found her looking straight back with that little smile on her face that said she knew exactly what Frankie was thinking.

Frankie smiled back without hesitating. “Mollie?”

“Yeah, Frankie,” Mollie replied warmly, and reached up to brush Frankie’s hair away from her forehead with her finger. Her smile was sleepy and content as she let her hand drop between them, eyes threatening to slip shut already.

Biting the inside of her lip to keep from grinning at the sight, Frankie blinked slowly before she asked, “Do you ever miss life before the band? Back when everything was normal and we didn’t have to worry about all of the publicity and everything, and you could stay home all you want and be with your friends without being called away, and you could spend time with your family…” It was a topic they had all discussed several times throughout their journey, but it was something that was weighing on her mind today after spending so much time with the King family.

Mollie had to pause to smother a yawn against the back of her hand. “Do you?” she asked curiously, once she had recovered.

“Sometimes,” Frankie admitted. “Things were far easier back then for me, between the two bands. I lived in my house and worked in a shop and I loved my family and friends, and yes, I occasionally sung passionately into my shower head.”

The blonde girl grinned. “And you don’t do that now?”

“I do, but things are different now, you know that. It doesn’t feel right to think that seeing my family is a special occasion for me, that talking to my mum is a rare thing to happen, or that we have to drive all this way so you can visit your family.”

“I know,” Mollie said sympathetically. “Sometimes it’s hard, and sometimes it just sucks outright being so far away. Believe me, I know, but there are good things. There’s performing on a big stage in front of thousands of people and getting to buy my family dozens of Christmas presents each. That’s a lot of fun.”

“Would you change anything?”

“Like if I could go back, would I do it differently?” she asked quizzically, and Frankie nodded. Mollie paused, tilting her head thoughtfully for a few seconds before she shook it from side to side. “No, I wouldn’t change a thing. I know what you’re thinking, and no, not even the accident.”

That had been what Frankie was thinking of saying, but she hadn’t expected that answer from her. After the entire struggle that Mollie had been going through in trying to get her memory back to normal, she would have easily expected her to try and go back instantly. Anyone else would have; Frankie should have remembered that Mollie wasn’t anyone, though.

“Why not?” she asked softly.

It took a moment for Mollie to put her thoughts into words. “Because… I died,” she answered finally, and gave a tiny shrug. Her blue eyes were focussed on Frankie’s face as she spoke, her hands brought up beneath her pillow. “I don’t know that I can really talk about anyone else here, or what people say about near death experiences, but I do know that I feel different than I did before. Knowing that I died makes more of a difference than I thought it would, and whenever I actually take the time to consider the idea that I was gone, really gone, even if it was just for a seconds… it makes me feel even luckier to be alive than I did before, and I love it.

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