[M] Say My Name [TF2 BL]

Part 7

Alexis POV

Chk. Phoomp. Chk. Phoomp. The entire aspect of fire never siezed to amaze me, no matter the cause or size of the flames. I caught myself playing with one of my lighters late again, glaring at the clock on wall across the room. It was 2:17 in the morning, but I wasn't the only one up. Tarry, Bill and Cole were chilling outside joking, laughing and gossiping about, having a grand ol' time; those wasted motherfuckers were part of reason I was awake still, as well as a few of the other mercs.

I closed my lighter, the metal giving away yet another satisfying click. I sighed and stowed it into a drawer on the nightstand and walked into the bathroom. I gazed into the mirror for a long while, staring at the burns, scars and freckles littering my body. Raven black hair tied into a long messy braid hung over a shoulder. Petrifying green eyes looked straight back at me after studying the marks and traits of my body. I dug my nails against kerosene counter, I was irritated and pissed. Why couldn't I let the others know about me and who I was under that heavy suit; the announcer was a bitch, it's not like they would care- they're all men.

I was beautiful before I took this hell job; The fucking goggles in the suit fucked with my head, I wasn't such a damn nutcase. Worries of my brother and mom back at home flooded my nerves like a river. I had no more tears to shed after today, anxiety gets the better of me, especially nowadays. This place sucks. It wouldn't matter anywho, the contract deadlines were archived due to the cart malfunction drama. I stared into the slightly cracked mirror at the formerly normal woman, watching my soul shatter, shaking and twitching.

Lost in the deep forest of thought and dread, there was an abrupt knocking on the door that nearly made my soil myself, admittingly. "Oi Alexis, you in there? I wanna discuss a thing wit' ya mate," Laurence called from the other side of the door. "Shit shit shit SHIT." I repeated, putting on my fireproof suit sloppily. I unlocked the door and removed the chair underneath the handle. "Hmm?" "Hey there! I need a favor from ya, only if ya think you can handle it." I put a hnd on my hip and nodded, cocking my head.

"Well, uh, another thing or two." The Blu sniper muttered, shooting a thumb behind him, pointing to Ned. I sighed and tried to say, "Just come in and we'll talk about it," gesturing to the inside of my room. The sniper and medic glanced at each other and walked into the messy, cramped space. I closed the door and turned to the two, shrugging. "Well, ve'd like to interest you in a recovery mission, jah?" Ned gawked. Laurence smiled and said, "We think that Randy might be an, um, an alien." Oh no, not this again. These two, of all the mercs pissed me off the most. Ask favors then not talk to me for weeks on end. This time they were making up some dumb excuse to get me to do something dumb. I groaned, itching away a pinching piece of my suit, then subtly flipped them off.

I tried to yell at them, but only angry muffles were heard outside the suit. "There's a difference between being retarded and being insane!" Laurence threw his hands up and sighed, "Ok criky, it's about a dumb tape that Ned wants for some reason." I was tired of not being heard, too tired to make an effort to communicate when nobody could hear me. I unzipped the suit so the sleeves fell to my hips and prying off the gas mask, dropping it, which made the two mercs gasp. "Stop coming to me for favors and then ghosting me when I'm useless, you bags of fuckpaste! I'm not gonna just do it because you tell me to you fucking uggos, that's what prostitution is you fucking assholes!" I scorned.

I longed to say those words to these fuckwads, the moment gave me a rare sense of clarity, only until Laurence spoke again. "You're a bloody girl?! A mean one at that," he shrieked. Ned was itching his head and staring at a random corner, as if doing the math on how I was female. "Um, this is overwhelming. I have for once lost words." I spat more insults and ranted at the two for another good ten minutes. Ned finally said something. "I get it, we haven't treated you, well,-" "Like a runt?! Like a piece of shit?! Sounds like a pretty accurate description, professor!" I growled. Laurence grabbed me by the shoulders, but I jerked his weary hands off and scoffed. "Bloody hell lady! What do you wat us to do? We were just asking a favor and now you're dumping all these grudges you've held on us over our heads?!" Laurence grumbled.

"Maybe start with treating me like a fucking human being. Sounds like a fantastic start, cunt." I snarled. I'm not putting my guard down for another person, let alone two, ever again. Ned pushed up his glasses and sighed, "I was just following along with Laurence's anatics, if I'm honest enough. Nobody knew you took it offensively, hell, nobody else here knows you're female. I would've never guessed."  Laurence squinted an eye. "Mate, nobody here would've guessed. Huh. Afterall, why are you hiding it?" I crossed my arms and scrunched my burnt nose. "Some bullshit the admin set up. I made my own damn flamethrower with more than one function, it was clearly enough for the bitch to hire me. Or at least that's that she calls it."

Laurence raised an eyebrow. "That's just creepy, why did she do, well, whatever she did?" Hmm, maybe the sniper wasn't as nosey as I suspected. I only shrugged and sighed, "Look, if you couldn't tell before I took off my suit, I have a temper. You can't tell anybody else about who I am. The bitch will hand it to me if she finds out I revealed myself. She might do it to you too if she gets pissed enough." The ex-doctor took a step and looked at the rather older-looking scortch that lined the left of my neck. "Is she burning you?" I shook my head, biting at my lip. Who said I had to tell them everything? "Vell, either way I can keep your secret, on a condition." "Uuuugh, lemme guess. Do the fucking favor. Lemme forsee why you need that dumb tape, has something to do with your gay soldier friend and perhaps his boyfriend."

"Shit. She's good," Laurence whispered to the medic. "Jah, how'd you know?" I gathered some litter on the floor and kicked it to a corner. "There's a thing called stealth. By the way, why you so obsessive over the mercs fuckin'?" Ned snickered at the retort. "Obsessive? Hypocrite, with your dumb flicker things, uh..." I picked up an emptied lighter from and handed it to him. "It's called a lighter, Einstein. My point standing, at least I'm not recording people having their alone time," I smirked, then glaring at Laurence. The sniper yawned and chuckled, "Ah piss, it's super late. Can we go now?" Ned exhaled a nosey breath. "Jah, but does anyone except the admin know?" I rasped, "Yeah, Miss Pauling knows. She handles all of us afterall." He nodded.

"Alvight, uh, I'll look at those burns and see what I can do if you vish." I raised an eyebrow. "Sounds neat. I'll get the damn tape anyway, again, temper." Laurence rolled his eyes and waved a fairwell; forget his stupid ass, Ned was more pleasing to talk to. Didn't wanna have a bitch-off at the moment anyway. "Laurence's wife is cheating on him, he isn't doing too well," he breathed. "He has a funny way of showing it. He looks like he's gonna go to war with a random hate group because he's bored." The worn doctor shrugged and yawned as well. "I should get some rest." "Am I stoppin' ya?" I teased. The exhausted ex-doctor glared at me and sighed, "Good night vhen." As he walked out of my dirty room, I yawned as well, "Alright, safe travels." I locked my door again and plopped onto my bed. I kicked my suit off my ankles to the floor and squeezed the stiff pillow. Sleep soon embraced me, and I fell to the slumberous land of make-believe.