Nowhere, Kansas

Part II - Past

"And the old lovers sing

'I thought it'd be me who helped him get home.'

But home was a dream, one I'd never seen

'til you came along."

* * *

Alex isn't one to linger in the past – never has been. It used to be that it made him too pissed off or sad or whatever; now it's just he's too damn busy. Building up a world class peds' department from scratch, parenting twins, being a good husband... it takes up so much of his brain-space he doesn't know what he'd do with nostalgia. So he doesn't really talk about or think about his old life very much. But once a month he doesn't have any choice in the matter: one of the very first things Izzie insisted on after he'd left Seattle was that Alex set up a recurring call with Meredith.

"You need friends," she'd insisted.

"I have friends. I have you."

"You need friends other than me. And Meredith needs you too," she'd said as she programmed the reminder into his phone. "Besides, it's good to have something outside of work and home to look forward to."

He agreed, if for no other reason than he knows it's pointless to argue with Izzie when she sets on to something like that. And it's nice to chat – even though Mer gives him a run for his money for who can be the busiest. But even that isn't a problem; if Mer happens to be occupied during their chat, she passes off the phone to Zola if she's at home or someone from Grey-Sloan if she's at work. It surprised him how good it felt to keep in contact with the old crowd, how these days, thinking about the past doesn't cause him anything but a mild pleasure.

And then, a few months into the calls, the pleasure grew into proper joy. One day he dialed in to the monthly call and saw not only Meredith but Cristina Yang grinning back at him from the screen.

"This is the closest thing I've had to a date in a year," she had snarked after his joyful greeting. "But it's better because I don't have to shave my legs."

The three of them enjoyed that call so much that these days, Yang is on the line as often as Mer. If he's at home during the call, sometimes he'll rope Izzie or the kids into chatting; the twins are forever asking after Mer's kids, and he can't decide if Eli loves Cristina or Meredith more. It's like a mini family reunion once a month, and more often than not, it serves to cement Alex's feeling of completion, his sense that this life was one he was meant to live.

So why is he dreading the call today?

"You look like crap."

Alex rolls his eyes. "Whatever happened to 'good morning'? 'Nice to see you, Alex'?"

"Good morning," Cristina teases. She's in her bed, covers pulled up to her chin, cascades of hair spilling over the pillow under her head. "Or evening, I guess, for you. You look like crap."

He doesn't want to smile, but he does. "Thanks."

"Are you still at work?"

"Yep." He reaches back to lock his office door and wanders over to his desk. "MVC. Two kids in the backseat. They'll make it." He glances down at his watch. "Mer planning on calling in?"

"In a bit. She had to help the kids get to bed. I just hung up with her."

"You've already been on the phone today? What time is it there, six AM?"

"Five."

"When do you sleep, Yang?"

"It's less sleeping and more refueling with coffee or tequila." The screen wavers as she shifts position. "So spill. What's with that face?"