utopia

dream

He's eating the sweets quietly. Yoongi plays with the hem of his scarf, counting each thick thread. Most of their times are spent in silence, where both of them sit across from each other. Yoongi usually is the one to talk, except that he doesn't like what he talks about. It's all about the city, the new things they discover, new foods they make, new festivals they celebrate. But that's all he sees, that's all he knows. The man only listens, then wishes Yoongi a good life. It's been a while since Yoongi had stopped talking about his days in the city. He's sick of his life. It suddenly makes him wonder how Seokjin used to be before. Probably much brighter than Yoongi was.

"Seokjin?"

"Yes." he turns to Yoongi and gives him back the bowl. "Thank you for the delights."

Yoongi's cheeks feel warm at the touch of their hands.

He smiles. "And thank you for eating them, finally."

The man hums in response. There's a weary look in his face, but he manages through. Faint and soft, but easy to recognize. It's a forced smile. It should be, because he can't smile. Yoongi tries making out Seokjin's facial features. There are bruises on his necks, small marks on his cheeks. It's almost fading, but still dark due to his complexion.

Something stirs inside his stomach. Yoongi remembers asking what happens when he's not here. Seokjin looked at him, and said that he bears the world's weight.

Maybe he does.

Yoongi turns to shove the bowl in his bag, blinking back his tears. He's hopeless. He doesn't know what to do. The city lights drive him insane. There are colours everywhere, no rest, no sign of staying still. He had already accepted this very place as his own utopia. It's funny, because he's in love with someone who only knows misery.