( DISCONTINUED)

{25}

Ten POV:

I headed up the stairs and arrived at our door. I was standing in
front of the door with my hand about to reach onto the door knob. My breath
hitched and I gulped while biting my lip. I inhaled quietly and then opened the door.

I closed the door behind me and then walked towards our bed. I sat down on the bed and got under
the covers. The bathroom door opened and Johnny came out with sweatpants on and damp hair.

Ten: ..whats this about?

Johnny: ...so Ten...

Ten: I'm not cheating on you... or controlling you... I'm not doing any-

Johnny: it isn't me or you.... well maybe its me...

Ten: ... you said you aren't going to break up with me no matter what... now what's this about?

Johnny: ...I'm not ready to adopt him...

There was a long silence between us and I looked up at him a little tears eyed.

Ten: ah... well... why's that dear?

Johnny: I'm scared that I won't have time for him... or I won't
be a good dad and I'll turn out like my dad. Or I'll get so busy that
I'll start avoiding you both and then you'll leave me and I'll-

Ten: fine... I'm not going to force you into anything... and if you aren't
ready then that's ok... and I'll wait until you're ready...

Johnny: ..Ten.. I know you're disappointed but-

Ten: .. John I actually need to get... to uh sleep.. since I, you know need to wake up early...

Johnny: ..yeah.. yeah..

I turned off the light and then laid in bed. Our backs facing each
other and I was having a long conversation in my head...

"Ten tell him you want to adopt!"

"He did tell him but Johnny said he wasn't ready!"

"Right right and if he isn't ready then we aren't"

"The fuck you mean we aren't?! We've been waiting for so long and Johnny is telling us now?!"

"He was probably nervous, lay off!"

"Go to bed stop thinking!"

"I can't I want to cry.."

"DONT CRY OR JOHNNY IS GOING TO FEEL BAD"

" right right then he's going to adopt"

"Which he doesn't want to do"

"...Ten be a good fiancé and do what Johnny wants"

"But why is it always Ten?!"

"Yeah what about Johnny?!"

"Back off, Johnny has done MANY MANY things. He bought us this house! He said he was going to pay the fee to adopt-"

"But why would he offer to pay the fee if he doesn't want to adopt?"

"Obviously to make you happy.."

"Why would he get our hopes up if he was just going to bring it down?"

.    .    .  

I mentally sighed and then cleared my mind. I started focusing on
my breathing and listened closely to calm myself.

"..Tennie... you awake?"